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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

or was this rude of them?

29 replies

mummiesnet · 18/12/2008 20:44

I invited my parents and my brother and SIL round for xmas drinks.

Brother and SIL said that they could not make it, they haven't seen each other much recently and were going to spend the day together.

Fair enough, I though, although was disappointed as they have been weird with us lately.

Anyway, halfway through they turned up saying they wanted to collect some stuff we had in our garage. I had to move the car so they could get it. I asked them if they wanted to stay for a drink, they said no and buggered off.

Half an hour later my brother turned up again, wanted to borrow something as SIL had broke something cleaning. So...they came, interrupted us when they knew we were entertaining, refused to stay for a drink as the were 'busy' then made it known they had just gone home to clean.

Was that a bit rude of them, do you think?

OP posts:
2AdventSevenfoldShoes · 18/12/2008 20:45

rude and odd

2cats2many · 18/12/2008 20:45

Yes. Seems a bit rude. What do you think is going on?

LynetteScavo · 18/12/2008 20:45

They should have at least stayed for a drink.

Original poster
mummiesnet · 18/12/2008 20:46

I don't know, they've been really odd lately. They've always been slightly rude but this was a bit more than that, I thought it was a bit passive-aggressive but didn't know if I was reading too much into it.

OP posts:
purpleduckUnderTheMistletoe · 18/12/2008 20:47

Maybe their "spending the day together" turned into "lets catch up on some jobs"...

a bit odd, and irritating, but maybe they have been busy, and then was the only time they could sort the stuff out...

lilacclaire · 18/12/2008 20:48

They've maybe got problems of their own going on and don't want to make it common knowledge or feel like socialising right now. Think your reading too much into it.

stuffmyturkey · 18/12/2008 20:48

rude

PestoHoHoHoMonster · 18/12/2008 20:48

rude

Original poster
mummiesnet · 18/12/2008 20:49

Thing is, if I turned down an invite somewhere on the basis of being busy I wouldn't turn up at the event twice for something non urgent. IYSWIM?

OP posts:
TimorousWeeBeastie · 18/12/2008 20:49

rude & baffling

SparklyBaubleFeast · 18/12/2008 20:51

did they have to collect their stuff during your drinkies?

SparklyBaubleFeast · 18/12/2008 20:52

were they going away?

TheCrackFox · 18/12/2008 20:53

rude and a bit odd.

Original poster
mummiesnet · 18/12/2008 20:53

Nope. Not going away. Was weird, really. They were quite pissed too, and what they collected, they weren't going to be using then, given the state of them.

OP posts:
MaryMotherOfCheeses · 18/12/2008 20:55

So they were drunk, collected stuff from you and then went home to "do cleaning"???

Exactly what kind of stuff did they collect from your garage?????

Original poster
mummiesnet · 18/12/2008 20:56

Their bicycles, which I have been looking after as they have no garage.

I can't see that they would have been going on a bike ride after a boozy lunch, and they certainly don't use them for anything functional like getting to work.

OP posts:
BlueBumedFly · 18/12/2008 20:58

rude and quite strange

Lemontart · 18/12/2008 20:59

Agree that, from the details you have given, it is really odd behaviour.
Are you sure there are not any other factors you might not have connected - did you have a moan about the clutter to another family member who might have told them you were moaning? or are there any other unresolved arguments lurking?
Just so weird that I can?t help but guess there is more to it. Can you not phone your brother up and ask him if he is ok as you can?t help but feel he is being a little distant with you recently?

whonickedmynickname · 18/12/2008 20:59

rude and I would have told them no I couldn't move my car - on account I'd been drinking!!!!!

SparklyBaubleFeast · 18/12/2008 21:00

odd, perhaps they're selling them?

DoubleBluff · 18/12/2008 21:00

very rude
very odd

Original poster
mummiesnet · 18/12/2008 21:02

I don't know what's going on really.

They could have been having problems, they do argue a lot.

The last time they did something weird I had booked (and paid for) tickets for the theatre for us and them. We waited and waited to meet them at the theatre and they didn't turn up.

We didn't see them at all that night. My brother later said they had had a big argument and that's why they didn't come. If he had texted me or something I could have sold the tickets on, but ended up out of pocket

I do think that my SIL is not a particularly nice person or good influence on him, he never used to be this thoughtless.

OP posts:
onepieceofbrusselssprout · 18/12/2008 21:05

Sounds attention seeking tbh. Were your parents with you - if so what did they make of all this?

Pantofino · 18/12/2008 21:07

Are they on the verge of splitting up or something that means all belongings need to be gathered together? It is definitely weird.

Original poster
mummiesnet · 18/12/2008 21:09

No, not splitting up AFAIK, they are in the process of buying another house and seemed as thick as thieves when we saw them,

Glad I'm not just being paranoid.

OP posts: