To expect my nanny NOT to feed my two year old a McDonalds Happy Meal?

[coolbeans]

I know it's not the end of the world and he is nearly three but I don't think it's unreasonable to expect her to ASK me, at least, before takes him out and stuffs him full of chicken nuggets and chips for lunch.

I'm not against McD's as such, but he's still really little and there's no need to take him there yet - it's not a bloody treat - as she seems to think.

I think that's what has annoyed me most. It's just food, I don't want him associating it with being a "treat" outing.

I don't understand your question. The DSSs' nanny doesn't know my child.

so if was your dp dss nanny - why would that bother your dp, ie not his child?

or have this blonde got herself confused with Acronyms?

dp darling partner - dss darling step son

I don't know how you manage it Anna, once again you've managed to make the point that not only are we inferior parents to the wonderful French, but we're all fat too.

Last time I went to Paris, I went in Galleries LaFyette. It looked much like Woolworths does at the moment (ie not a good look). 99% of the women were terribly badly dressed, and overweight, and 1% was Carla Brunei.

Are you by any chance Grace in "Don't Tell Alfred" by Nancy Mitford?

Galeries Lafayette is for the banlieusards

I'll look that up - I'm thinking it means suburban?

I love you Anna, please don't think I am having a pop at you. Never change, you are hilarious.

I don't think the French are great parents, btw. Too cold and distant for my liking.

Oh I know she is. That's why I think she is exactly like Grace Valhaubert in "Don't Tell Alfred".

Read it, it's v v funny.

Ok Anna, what terrible things is the nanny feeding your DSS?

I worked in Paris for a while btw, and the family ate rubbish (microwave rice fgs!) and the children had formula milk and microwave toddler meals.

Anna8888 HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA You must be a robot, WTF is 'micromanage'

OP - like others have said on here - ditch the nanny and look after your own children

"Ditch the nanny and look after your own children"

Helpful firststeps. Good thing we don't all take that advice - tax revenue down, unemployment up. Brilliant.

firststeps, I think that's really unfair to the OP - Lots of parents use childcare, and they all expect to have some say over what their child is fed, that's quite reasonable. You just can't expect your childcarer to know your wishes unless you tell them.

Should all mothers who have preferences for what their children eat just not go to work then?

if you told the nanny from the outset you hated MCDs then you ANBU but if you never outlined your preferences then why wouldn't do something many people in the universe consider a treat?

I take my DCs to MCDs on occasion - always the drive in tho - I find the resturant manky - they love it as an occasional treat - no different to having chips or chocolate as a treat.
each to their own tho i suppose - you are entitled to hate mcds but don't beat the nanny up for not instinctively knowing your preferences

Anna, if you don't mind me my saying, your dp is one employer who could really benefit from telling your dss' long serving nanny upfront what exactly he regards as good and not-so-good food. Just a small investment in time could clear up this simple issue. Is he paying her a handsome wage to expect the food standards of a skilled childcare professional?

blueshoes - DP is quite clear; however, it is complicated by the fact that while he employs the nanny, his exW manages her - and DP and exW do not see eye-to-eye on childcare...

Poor nanny is in an invidious position then really, as she works for two divorced parents who don't agree on what they expect of her. Hardly fair to hold her up as an example of poor nannying.

That's no excuse for buying children so many cakes at tea time that they then don't have room for a healthy supper.

No it isn't, because it should be obvious that is not on if it is a regular occurance. However it's an issue for your DP and his ex wife to sort out, not you (unless she also gives them to your daughter).

I never talk to DSSs' nanny - though of course I do have to deal with the fall out when the DSSs pitch up for dinner and aren't hungry.

I am not a perfect mum. Nor is anyone else I know. Godsakes, I started by saying this is the only thing I've ever done that's turned out as I planned. Seems to me a freak event too. Everything else was comically not as I thought before les enfants. Ergo, iw as worng about nearly everything.

Surely that gives you some kind of clue?

But are you all actually saying it's somehow jumped up or lahdidah to want to avoid crap food from big multinationals that pay their staff sh** wages?

At home, everything we eat is organic / local and everything is cooked from scratch. However, my children do have the occassional McDonalds for the simple reason that many of the long trips / activities we do would be much more difficult without the possibility of a quick hot meal along the way.

I loathe the middle class prejudice about Macdonalds. The food there is no different in nutritional terms to the bulk of offerings at places like Giraffe, which of course the middle classes flock to. A hamburger and chips is broadly the same wherever it's served. I know a family who never eat with their kids and ban them from Mcdonald's an dyet feed them on a diet of M&S pizza's and ready meals. Insanity.

I have no "middle class prejudice about MacDonalds". Like JaneLumley, I just want to avoid, as far as possible, giving my family crap food from large multinationals that pay their staff shit wages.

A prejudice and a conscious (informed) decision are very different things indeed.