Firstly I think you need to talk to your dh again, and ask him directly why it is that he doesn't want to eat with the children. Then you can look at the specific issue and try to find a workable solution.
For what it's worth, I fed the children seperately for years and years - partly because they needed their tea at 5pm-ish if they were going to be ready to go to bed at 7.30pm, and partly because I liked to have that quiet time with dh and to be able to eat my meal in peace. Also dh used to commute to work in London, so he was not usually home until 7.30pm or later, which was far too late for the children to eat.
I did consider eating with them, and leaving him a plateful of food to heat up, but felt that this would not be terribly fair to him.
It did mean that, for a long time, I've been cooking two meals each evening, but as the children have got older, I've been able to plan our menu mainly around meals that we all like and that can be prepared in advance - like casserole, bolognese, curry, shepherds pie, sausages and mash, sausages and roasted veg, lasagne, risotto etc etc - so that I just did one lot of cooking, but then had a bit of extra cooking to do for our tea - ie, heating up the curry or bolognese and cooking some pasta or rice, or bunging a second shepherds pie or lasagne in the oven. Sometimes the boys and we had different things because they like the occasional pizza or burger and I don't - and partly, I have to admit, because I sometimes do them something from the freezer and chips because I'm sooo tired.
Now we've moved, however, dh is coming home at a far more reasonable time and the boys are going to bed later, so can eat later, and so we eat together as a family far more of the time - it's just evolved that way.