in thinking that sometimes, just sometimes my ds should do as he's asked?

[CatMandu]

Ds is just 6 and honestly he really is a lovely boy with a very sweet nature, but the last few weeks have been a nightmare. I cannot remember the last time that he did something I asked without having to be asked a second or third time. Dh had a chat with him a while ago about it, but tbh nothing changed. I'm consistent with boundaries etc and don't let him get away with it, which is making life very hard work. He's my third dc, so not the first 6 year old I've had, by my goodness he is testing me at the moment.

More of a rant I think, but have just really shouted at him and am feeling that lovely combination of extremely frustrated and guilty.

do as he's asked...

yes, he should do as he is told. But IMO/E (with older kids), children don't do it until they know you REALLY MEAN IT (ie a consequence) or know when you need it done by ('when x is finished do yz' or 'by the time I get to 1, you need to have xyz. 54321')

so totally normal and infruriating is what i am trying to say

Of course you are not being unreasonable - but in my experience, boys have some sort of selective hearing and certain words trigger deafness - words like 'tidy' and 'bedtime'.

All three of mine are very good at looking as if they are listening, and making all the right noises ('yes, mum, I'll tidy my bedroom right now - yes, to your standards, not mine, mum - promise!'), but with the next breath they've totally wiped out whatever it was that I've asked/told them to do, and they go their merry way.

It's a wonder I've got any hair left, the number of times I've felt like tearing it out!

I'm sorry that this isn't more helpful or hopeful, but maybe it will help to know that you are definitely not the only one in this position.