I don't want "my life back", I want it to be"taken over" again.

[supadoula]

Here I am. 37, 2 children, 1 girl and 1 boy and consensus (husband, family, friends) seem to agree that I should just get on with things and not expect to have another child. "you've done your bit" they say, "time to think of your career", they say, "you are too old now", "you wouldn't survive the sleep deprivation again", "time to move on".
Well, I can't move on. Call me selfish, masochist, whatever you want, but I constantly think about having another baby, growing it inside me, going through another birth (this might sound crazy to some, but the births of my 2 children are the two greatest moments in my life!)... and then, think of the cuddles, breast-feeding, nurturing, smiling and pure love of discovering your new born.
Am I being unreasonable? Or do I need therapy? My broodiness is verging on obsessiveness but nothing else in my life seems to be worth doing. Am I normal???

...

your broody, thats normal. if you like being a mum , then have more , a family is more important and worthwhile than any job,... im feeling like that too, i cant have anymore dh has had the snip!,>>

Are you sure your two children will not suffer if you have a third? I find it interesting that no one no this thread seems to have mentioned this aspect directly. IMO it's not just about the relationship between you and your partner and your new baby - you have two other children to consider.

If you have a baby, are you confident you can give your two dcs the same amount of attention and enough practical support?

For lots of mothers, the answer will be a certain 'yes' to the above. But for me, the answer was 'no'. I felt having a third child would stretch my patience and stamina to its limits and this would impact on my relationship with my older two children. And that's not even taking into account the extra cost and practical complexities!

With two children I think you need to consider their needs, both now and in a few years time. Worst case scenario, if your dh is really against you having a third child and it drives a permanent wedge between you, how will this affect your other children as they grow up?

I went through these types of thoughts in my mind and decided against trying for another child, but admittedly I never felt a huge urge in the first place.

ds is 15 and essentially grew up as an only child. He will probably be off to college and possibly leaving home soon after dd starts school.

DD is 3 and, whilst she and ds adore each other/fight like cat and dog sometimes, I didn't really want her to be growing up without any lose siblings either....

I had dd2 at 38 - had always wanted three children and felt life wouldn't be complete without a third child. I hate the early months but she is still a joy (8 months old), I felt I would be selling myself short if I didn't have a third child but there is no way I would have a fourth .

don't have to explain yourself SantaKLAWs DH is 12 years older than me and i'm really worried about being broody again in the future as the man is already on his last legs

I completely agree it's now or never for me tomorrow, seeing a consultant for IVF.
Everyone seems to think we should be going back to living our lives like single people or a couple do again in the next 5 years but to be perfectly honest, what was so great about that ?

Maybe I am missing out on some fantastic social life, but I never really liked getting pissed.