to not want to put my name on the envelope

[beansmum]

Everyone at ds's nursery was given a little note asking for contributions for a xmas presssie for the teachers. In the note it says please place it in an envelope and write your name and your child's name on the front. It was underlined in the note btw. Why do they need to know who gave what? Are they only going to sign the card from your child if you give money? It just seems unnecessary and a bit nosy. AIBU to put my contribution in a plain envelope with no name on it? Will ds be left off the card?

In the office where I work I buy everyone a card on their birthday. I pay for it. I pass it round and everyone else in the office signs it. I do this because I like to do it, if I didn't want to do it, I wouldn't.

In the OPs case, clearly, the people organising the damm thing DO mind.

We try to keep track to work out if most people have given. It isn't fair if lots of people don't donate. However it really isn't a problem if people choose not to. It is just easier to know roughly how much money we will have when trying to decide what to buy. There are 22 in DS's class so we would assume that if everyone gave we would have X amount and we will budget accordingly.

We ask for a certain amount so don't need the amount on the envelope but I know that if the envelopes are being left at reception the receptionist asks people to put the amount on the envelope for security reasons.

the class rep in dd3's year has a good solution to this. she sends home an envelope containing a sticky label. your child writes/draws a message on the sticky label, the label and your contribution are put in the envelope and returned to her. she then turns the money into Boots vouchers or equivalent, sticks the sticky labels in a large Christmas card and puts the card and the labels into an envelope for the teacher.

she could obviously still work out who had given what if she wanted to but I doubt she does. it means the children sign the card without the faff of passing it round everyone and if your child makes a mess of their drawing you can always find another label and they can do it again.

Why isn't it fair if lots of people dont donate? Sorry I am just not getting this at all.

I don't know why anyone takes on the responsibility of collecting-it really is a thankless task!

I'm not annoyed at all. Not even a tiny bit.

I just can't work out why we need to put our names on the envelope, I can't understand why it is SO important that the instruction to do so is underlined and I can't understand why anyone would be bothered if some people who hadn't contributed were on the card. I just don't get the whole thing and I was wondering what would happen if I didn't put my name on the envelope.

Try it and find out beansmum.

In response to the question about not hassling people.
I do the collections for my workplace too. It is a thankless task. We do collections when people leave. I sent an email to everyone with the request, and a date when I would need the money so I could shop for the gift. There hasnt been a single contribution. I know that some people are struggling for money at the moment, though to be fair the people I work with are pretty well paid.
I think that the leaving party is going to be awkward

Ivykaty - it isn't fair if half the parents donate and the gift is given from 'all the parents'. My DS is at a private school and money isn't an issue so if people either want to do their own thing or not do anything - that is fine but I do not feel it is fair to put that it is from everyone.

ok fine - am starting to get it. Seems it would be much easier to do your own thing.

Then no one needs to collect, keep safe, and account for who gave what.

What happens if one person gives £10 and another person give £2 then it will not be fair either.

I have asked my dd if this is done at the infants she went to or the junior she is now at - the answer was no. (I was begining to think I have been missed all this time)

TBH I am glad it isn't done as it sounds a complete PITA,

Ivykaty - my MIL was a receptiona teacher for years and is also a ballet teacher. She ends up with so much STUFF. So I thought that a collection would be better.