..to be slightly miffed in the first case and a little apprehensive in the second...?

[Poshpaws]

1st case: Lovely mum at school gate asks me to give her some ideas for an 8 year old boy's birthday as she has no clue what to do for her son. She takes up the suggestion I give her and invites my DS1 verbally(in front of DS1). Anyway, a week later no invitation is forthcoming, but I hear other mums talking about it and thanking her for the invitation.

Now, she is really lovely and I don't want to put her on the spot by asking her, and DS1 has not even mentioned it. Should I let it go? Am only miffed because I gave her the idea

2nd case: DS2 has been invited to his first pre-school party. However, I only know the host mum and the other mums are great friends with another mum with which I have a long history. I am still going to take DS2, but must admit I am quite nervous about going. Any tips?

1st case you have been invited, turn up if you wnat to or maybe ask if you can bring something or check the time.

2nd case go along and play with your ds or ask if you can help prepare some food, keep busy.

I think its safe to assume you're invited in case one, Mum obviously knows she invited your ds verbally so saw no need to send you the invite. If you're nervous about it, ask her about what present her boy wants or how the ideas are coming along etc. Your mind will be put at rest.
With case two, have a back up plan, ask dh to ring you so you can make a quick exit after a bit if things are hairy. Be nice and pleasant to everyone, offer to help but not too much... I'm sure you'll have a great time both times...

must admit i would be wondering whether in case 1 it was just something she said on the spur of the moment and has either forgotten or didnt really intend to invite your son. i would let it go then if she asks whether you are coming or not you can clarify you werent sure re invitation. re secid case. go along and yes eep yourself busy being a good helper! my dd1 has yet to be invited to a pre school party. wonder why that is so you should feel happy ds2 is invited!!

Thanks for the replies. Have decided to leave case 1 until she says something to me. DS1 does not seem bothered so less money for me to shell out

Re case 2, I will go and be myself. Have never been in a position before where I knew hardly anyone at a child's party, so was a bit worried.

nowwearefour, or course I am happy DS2 was invited, being as he has speech delay and as a result, peer issues , so yes I understand the feeling of wondering if and when your child would be invited to something.