Should I follow through with what I said?

[Fiveplusbump]

They both have a party each to go to on Saturday ,their behaviour has been shocking this week especially this morning and evening.
All dd 2 (7)has done is basically whine and lash out at everyone and all dd 3 (5)has done is whinge ,cry and shout oh and kick a few doors .
I told tham if they carried on at bedtime I would not take them to the parties so should I go through with it ,they have actually given me a headache.
They are not usually like this I think they are a bit snotty and tired but it still is not an excuse for this tonight .

You've said it - You know you have to do it!

You have to go through with your threats, but I guess you know tht anyway.

Is wine an option? Or a nice bath, given the bump status.

I tried a bath ,ended up with both of them screaming at the door . DP has been at work all day and now we are both sniping at each other .

I have just told them I will not change my mind .

I think you should sit them down in the morning and make it very clear what your expectations are for their behaviour tomorrow and Friday if they expect to go to the party. Say you are sad and upset about the way they have been behaving, and that you know they can do better. That way they have the possibility of a reprieve, and you are not back tracking, but you are also not reacting in anger.

Oops. Sorry I thought they were already in bed, not still actively being bad.

You do need to follow through with the punishment, but give them an exit strategy where they can earn their party invites back ...

I would sit them down tomorro when you are all calm (hopefully) and say something along the lines of

"you realise that at the moment neither of you are going to the party becuase of last night. But i do think you would enjoy yourselves at the party so because i am spectacular, extraordinary mother I am giving you another chance to show me today/over the next few days how well behaved you can be. You do that you can go to the party"

If they don't go to the parties then you have to have them with you at home. Couldn't you think of a different threat???

Nagapie's idea is good.

Saturday is quite a long time away. Too long for a really good threat IMOO ... you need something a bit more immediate, surely?

Anyway, good luck!

I agree with those who say give them a chance to earn the parties back. Totally agree with prettyb when she says that using a threat that's days away is just too long away. It is shooting yourself in the foot big time. Kids who have nothing to lose cos they've lost it already have no incentive to behave better!

Turn it to the positive by, as people have suggested, letting them earn it back - and by doing it in a really positive way, and telling them as mumof2 says, you are BRILLIANT and they are lucky to have a mum like you