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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to want to punch this school receptionist!

52 replies

tjacksonpfc · 25/11/2008 12:04

i have a dd and a ds at the same school. my ds had recently been diagnosed with asthma and teh last 2 nights i have been up with him coughing and weezing to the extent he is making himself sick. so i left him in bed this morning he is only 3 and phoned the school at 9 am like we are asked to, to tell them neither dcs would be in as ds is really ill with his asthma and going to see dr today and i wasnt willing to take him out in the cold for a bus journey of 1 hr each way like he is.

her response was ill put a note up on the board but there really isnt any reason that your dd cant come to school today. now aibu to want to punch her for this comment doesnt she reallise for ffs that asthma can be life threatening.

sorry for rant but had to get it off of my chest

OP posts:
cheeset · 25/11/2008 12:37

tjacksonpfc, I would have done the same as you. For goodness sake, I say things like I want to punch someone but I have NEVER done it as it's a way of releiving stress verbally! I would never say it to someones face for instance either.

Aye you lot, leave her alone, you know who you are....

smugmarried · 25/11/2008 12:39

Me? I thought I was being quite nice for once.

VinegarTits · 25/11/2008 12:40

Oh i have often wanted to punch the school receptionist over the years, and the patronising, talk down to you like your a pupil, twunting teachers aswell

I wouldnt have taken a sick 3 yr on and hr bus journey either

Romy7 · 25/11/2008 12:40

i think they just get bored with trying to explain to the rules to people nicely, and end up saying 'well, ok, but jimmy will be marked 'unauthorised absent' today then'. it's not being rude really, it's just not fluffying up the truth of the situation. i'm all for a bit of fluffying up myself (hence my irrational rage at the ridiculousness of punching the perfectly legitimate school receptionist) but i can see why it gets wearing after trying to explain to the tenth mother on the phone that it may seem 'reasonable' to her not to bring dd in today, but it is against the lea policy.
maybe you need to brief the head on your particular circs at the moment if they are likely to be causing some unavoidable disruption?

cheeset · 25/11/2008 12:41

And another thing, I find mumsnet aggressive atm, maybe it's a way of mums releiving themselves of stressful situations. I can always switch off or ignore or be happy in the fact I am not feeling this anger myself? Free country isn't it?

Mercy · 25/11/2008 12:41

I didn't take it literally, I thought the OP was just letting off steam too.

It is very scary watching someone having an asthma attack.

How is your ds now?

cheesesarnie · 25/11/2008 12:41

yabu to want to punch the receptionist yes.

Original poster
tjacksonpfc · 25/11/2008 12:45

thats just it Romy the school no my situation and have said they will be as helpful and supportive as they can and then u get this. and no im not going to punch anyone it will probably hurt me more than them any way i cant hit or toffees and im not into pain. i just needed to vent to someone and i thought mn was the best place to do it.

And no i wasnt rude to the receptionist im not like that well not to her face . i just want to no why receptionist have this type if attitude.

thats the whole reason im learning to drive smug as i dont want to swap the dcs school as we dont no how long we are here for if i could drive i would have taken dd to school today as ds could have been wrapped up warm in the car and one of the mums at the school would have taken dd in for me but it just wasnt an option today.

OP posts:
cheeset · 25/11/2008 12:46

Right now F*k *f !

Just rattles me, gosh isn't life hard enough-- guilty for working/guilty for staying at home, breast/ bottle, he loves me/he's had an affair, interest rates/credit crunch blah blah.

If tjack wants to punch the receptionist only in her mind (not really hard, just a small wee jab) then let her!

VinegarTits · 25/11/2008 12:46

Oh wouldnt it be lovely to never have aggtesive feelings towards those that annoy us, your just so perfect

katsh · 25/11/2008 12:47

OP, I completely understand your upset, i'm sure you'd never punch the receptionist in rl - you're just expressing frustration. As the mother of an asthmatic child I am completely behind you in your decision not to take a child whose asthma is not under control, into the cold. Hopefully your doctor will be able to give you the right stuff to help him. Sometimes we have to make difficult decisions about prioritising our children's needs. And for all those who dismissed asthma as not serious, you are right that in many cases asthma is very mild, but it can be life threatening and it is very frightening to watch a child struggling to breathe. I hope that your son is much better soon.

cheeset · 25/11/2008 12:52

QuintessentialShadow
'I take offence to such violence in headings. It is not normal.'- What is normal?
This is a genuine question. I kind of know where you are coming from and if I had a friend lets say displaying aggressive tendancies, we probably wouldn't be friends.
But mnet is not a real world is it? DYKWIM?

Original poster
tjacksonpfc · 25/11/2008 12:53

thanks for the support on here cheeset lol ill get u later

lol vinegar tits perfect world would be lovely wouldnt it.

thanks for that katsh he is still in the trial and error stage hense why he is back at drs again today ill keep you informed how he goes.

OP posts:
lowenergylightbulb · 25/11/2008 12:54

Well, I must be a really bad mummy because when I've had kids come down with vomiting bugs, tonsillitis, flu type viruses and they have been too ill to leave the house any siblings have had to stay at home too.

It's a no brainer - I'm not going to leave a sick littlie alone, or send another littlie to school unaccompanied, and it wouldn't have killed the school sec. to have been a bit more sympathetic.

YANBU.

VinegarTits · 25/11/2008 12:58

I would have said to the receptionist. well which do you suggest i do?

A - Leave my 3 yr ds home alone
B - Send my 4 yr dd to school alone

Cos you cant be in two place at once can you, and there is no excuse to not send dd to school now is there? the snotty mare.

Romy7 · 25/11/2008 12:59

the only person who mentioned asthma was me, and only to point out that it wasn't a problem for the dd, only the ds.
fwiw i have been very close to casualty twice this week with ds, and wasn't dismissing asthma as not serious. at one point ds spent over a month being nebulised five times a day. no lecture required, thanks.

ach, OP. if you've spoken to the school, then ignore her, she was obviously having a bad morning like you. the head will be aware, so don't stress. (but don't forget to fill the form in/ write a note when you take them back lol - a phone call won't count )

as for driving - it opens up a whole new world of possibilities - remember to get a large plastic bowl so that one can be vomiting whilst you are dropping the other one off.

and no punching.

Original poster
tjacksonpfc · 25/11/2008 13:01

i was thinking of saying vinegar ok ill bring my dd in and when my ds ends up in hospital really ill with asthma it will be a bupa one and ill forward the bill to you that would have shut her up wouldnt it

OP posts:
cupsoftea · 25/11/2008 13:02

yanbu - your 3yr old is sick & seeing the doc so why is it a problem for the school that you can't get your 4yr old to her class. They are unreasonable not you. Hope your ds is better soon xxx

BitOfFun · 25/11/2008 13:08

What are your circumstances? You don't have to tell us, but if you could be in this situation for a year or so, I would look into home ed, or even just withdrawing them as they don't legally need to be in school. I would have thought the stress of that sort of commute for more than a week tops was completely unfeasible, never mind having to deal with sleepless nights and serious illness. Have you tried thinking laterally about the whole issue, because this set-up sounds enormously (and possibly unnecessarily) stressful. If you feel like punching people on a regular basis, perhaps you need to look at the wider problem?

Original poster
tjacksonpfc · 25/11/2008 13:13

no bitoffun i dont fell like punchng people normally honest im to laid back for that normally and lie i said i cant hit people anyway id end up getting hurt more. its emergency accomadation. the reason i havent moved the dcs is because they are settled and i want some normality and routine for them and hopefuly in a few weeks i will be driving wich will make it a lot less stressfull.

ty cupsoftea hopefully when its under control it will be ok but its still early so still trying t get control over it

OP posts:
cheeset · 25/11/2008 13:16

BitOfFun 'If you feel like punching people on a regular basis, perhaps you need to look at the wider problem?'
OMG I am insane then lol How do you class 'regular'? See, for me, it's once a month (in my mind only )- a quick jab to the back of my DH's! lol

BitOfFun · 25/11/2008 13:21

Hehehe, sorry if I sounded patronizing....the whole situation sounds really rough for you, I hope you can get it sorted. Maybe worth asking the lea if they can help finance taxis or something?

Original poster
tjacksonpfc · 25/11/2008 13:22

lol cheeset doe sthat mean that u need sectioning then if its monthly its the first time ive felt like this o i got quite away to go to get to your level then

OP posts:
smugmarried · 25/11/2008 13:26

You only get the urge to punch your DH once a month!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Jeez, I get that nearly every day.

Especially when he's sitting opposite me at tea time ramming the food into his mouth so quickly and forcfully that the fork makes a 'ting' noise on his teeth.

Let all give someone a virtual punch today, yeah!!!

grumblingirl · 25/11/2008 13:31

Jeez - people are so quick to tell people off on here at the moment. It's obvious that the OP is just having a rant, how can you be offended by the choice of her words? Her son is sick, she's obviously having a rough time of it at home and the school woman is winding up an already wound up individual. YANBU.

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