to make the dd's give up ballet in order for them to have two afternoons a week without any activities?

[emkana]

Dd1 will start playing the violin in the school orchestra now so it was a welcome opportunity for me to suggest stopping ballet because the cost is crippling. Also I feel that it's good for them to have two afternoons a week when there's nothing else on. But dh thinks it's enriching for them to have lots of activities after school. Also they now don't do any physical after school activities.

No, YANBU. At least two afternoons a week free are a minimum, imo.

Cost is one thing to consider seriously but I really think if they enjoy it they should still go. As for how much they do I think kids set their own levels and will tell you if they are doing too much.

I think teh dds should choose

It just seems madness that every minute of their time in the week is taken up by some structured activity or other. Also I feel they miss having that time together.

but if they are enjoying it, and they have been allowed to take it up in thepast, why would you just stop it?

If you can afford it I would let them decide. If you cant afford it, then I think you should choose.

Agree emkana, its good for them to have time to play without structured activities. We've given up 2 activities this term, now down to 2 a week instead of 4. dd was just knackered. She doesn't really seem to miss them although she enjoyed them while she was doing them.

They started it in the past when they weren't doing anything else, but now they are doing Rainbows and Brownies and dd1 is doing orchestra, and they would like to do horse-riding next summer, so something has to give I think.

Maybe you could tell her that ( that she will have to give up something). Maybe she could choose which activity is less important to her but I think ultimatly, it has to be yours and your husband decision. Is ballet her most expensive activity? Is that one of the reason you wish she'd stop (along with wanting to spend more time with her).

Yes ballet is by far the most expensive and also the most time-consuming.

Am really torn on this still.

emkana - do they enjoy ballet? you should give them some level of choice in which activity goes, I think.
(rainbows and brownies should still be quite active, shouldn't they? I know it was a loooong time ago when I was there but I seem to remember a reasonable amount of running around...)

Ask the girls what they would like to do/give up. You are right, it is good for them to have some free time. But don't insist they stop something they might enjoy - let them decide what goes.

Agree, let them choose.

how about a compromise [long shot]
have a look for a fun dance activity (i.e. also cheaper) so that it isn't as time-consuming and costly as the ballet, but they can still enjoy dancing>?
Have just given the same advice to best friend re her dd and gymnastics - four times a week and costing a mint, has now swapped for 'fun' club which has one weekday evening session and one weekend optional fun session, all much happier

I prefer my Dc to have at least a couple of activity free after schools a week. the cost factor is also a big one. I would prefer them to do some physical activity though!

My dcs can each do 2 things if they choose, and I absolutely WILL NOT run around every day.
I think it is very important to have some down time.

I think if you can no longer afford it, and if they are doing it for enjoyment (ie - they are not likely to be famous ballerinas ) then I think its ok to take a term or so off. Is there any way they can do things on the same night or something so that it clears another night??

After school activites are fine, but I don't think the whole family should suffer time wise or financially because of them (unless you child has a talent)