My DS- what do you think?

[honestfriend]

I am always having a moan about my 22 yr old who is back home for a few months post uni.
He is working, btw.

Tonight, I let him in, as he had no key- or rather it was left in the car he is using. (car bought by me so DS and DD could learn to drive as cheaper than lessons for both.)

I asked him to bring key in- security risk leaving it in car overnight- car is in private drive, but it is a 12 yr old car and not fitted with alarms etc.

He thinks this is unreasonable of me- and shouted etc and have me a lecture about how likely - or rather unlikely - it would be to have car nicked- and said if it happened we would just change locks- or rather I would need to faff on changing locks etc at great expense, blah, blah, blah.

Why can't he just do as I ask and stop arguing over every sodding thing, thinking he is right all the time?

We are at home 2night alone as my DH is away on business- id o not want a set of house keys left in the car!

AIBU?

Not at all unreasonable.

I have a 22 year old DD and I've found that I can only stand to live in the same house as her for 8 hours at the most.

Luckily I live in the middle of nowhere with no public transport or night life, so she is extremely unlikely to want to stay over.

I feel for you.

Thanks!

I love him to bits, but this sharing a home after he has been away for 4 yrs is not working at all!

YANBU.

But, I assume before he left for uni he lived at home with you and dh?
I bet (like most mums) you done most of the running of the house and the running around for him.
My point is, he is still learning to become independant and you still have the same role to play in his life....he thinks.....

The more you put your foot down, the more he will eventually catch on.
Even thouth they might like to keep letting you know they are adults now, we know they still have a lot of growing up to do.

It will get better, Honestly.

Tell him to get the keys RIGHT NOW!!

YANBU - I would tell him to do as you have reasonably asked or go and live somewhere else tbh

He is an adult (your darling boy, but still an adult!) its your house - therefore your rules

its a sodding reasonable request!

Oh yes!I forgot!!

Tell him to get the BLOODY KEYS!!!

You still have to put your foot down.

Thanks ladies- done and he's got them- but not without saying he is worried about me s I have such "irrational thoughts and fears" - anyone got a punch bag they can lend me?

I would go with the your house your rules thing.
At 22 he should know better. Hes not a teenager anymore and theres reason for his behaviour.
I was a married homeowner with a baby at 22 ffs there are no excuses for him.

Oh and whos name is the car in because I would be tempted to take it back.

Shame isn't it when all that education doesn't teach them to have any bloody common sense!

Ooooh, that sounds harsh bronze, there's enough kids that try it on with their mum.

Yes he's 22, but I really do think that the male species take a little longer to mature than us ladeeeezzzzz.

Thanks ladies- bronze - the car is in my name, but there is no point taking it back as he couldn't get to work- 25 miles away. and as he has student debts of £30K after 4 years full time study at uni then he is not yet in a position to buy one!