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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to not help dd2 look for her DS ??

14 replies

IllegallyBrunette · 14/11/2008 17:12

When we got home from school, all three dc had to get together any things they wanted to take to xp's with them.

Dd2 currently has a bit of an attitude problem and quite often talks to me in a less than nice way.

She shouted up the stairs to me 'where is my ds' in her usual aggressive tone.

I told her that I wouldn't even begin to help her find it unless she spoke to me properly, cue a mini maeltodwn from her.

I then refused to wait for her to find it and we left. She cried all the way round to xp's (5 min away) and generally looked very upset. Once there she remembered where she'd left it.

I don't know what is going on with her lately, she is sulky, grumpy and seems misxerable 99.9% of the time and I feel like I am failing her in some way.
My mum recently found an album of photos of dd2 when she was about 4/5 and dd2 was looking at them and saying how different her hair was etc etc, but the main difference that struck me was that she was smiling in nearly every pic. That sight is such a rare thing nowadays.

Anyway, now on the one hand I am thinking that I should stick to my guns, as she has been repeatadly warned about how she speaks to me and the other half of me is thinking I should go and get and and take it round to her.

OP posts:
IllegallyBrunette · 14/11/2008 17:12

Perhaps this should of been in behaviour.

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LIZS · 14/11/2008 17:21

I wouldn't - she can survive without it and next time she might just be more civil.

alarkaspree · 14/11/2008 17:22

How old is she?

(I thought your grandson had gone missing from the thread title!)

IllegallyBrunette · 14/11/2008 17:23

You are right. I think it just upset me because she used to be such a lovely, happy little girl and I don't know whats gone wrong with her.

I got a bit of her back a couple of days into our holiday in Sept, but then as soon as we were home she went back to being miserable.

OP posts:
IllegallyBrunette · 14/11/2008 17:24

LOL, no, no grandson.

She will be 9 next month.

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dustystar · 14/11/2008 17:24

I thought the same alarkaspree

I wouldn't take it to her after she was so rude to you.

dustystar · 14/11/2008 17:25

Its probably hormones - dd is just 10 and can be incredibly rude to me.

pingping · 14/11/2008 17:26

I am so simple I thought your daughter had lost her Darling son

IllegallyBrunette · 14/11/2008 17:27

No, you all right, I won't take it to her.

It is weird because dd1 (11) has had an attitude for ages now but with her you can tell that most of it is just showing off etc. With dd2 is seems like she really hates me the way she speaks to me.

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pingping · 14/11/2008 17:28

How long has you and your XP been spilt could that be effecting her? Is she happy at school no signs of bullying or anything?

MadMarg · 14/11/2008 17:29

Good for you for sticking to your guns. My sister's DD throws wobblies when she forgets something in the same way and my sister gives in all the time and waits/goes back for it/gets a replacement etc, etc. My niece is getting worse and worse. I have had a real go at her (niece) about the way she talks to my mum (her grandmother) and told her that if I heard her being rude again she would have me to deal with, and she REALLY wouldn't like the repurcussions.
When I'm there, she's a darn site more civil now. (Evil auntie!!!)

Good luck with it, I'm sure she'll eventually come around.

cass66 · 14/11/2008 17:31

Don't. she'll learn if you stick to your guns.

My 6 yr old can be just as unpleasant. But if I'm strict with her she seems to be better behaved.

Good luck.

IllegallyBrunette · 14/11/2008 17:33

I have been sepreated from xp for about 2 1/2 years. Dd2 did take it harder than her siblings as she is generally alot more sensitive.

We have also had recent problems with bullying, but I have spoken to school about it and it does seem to have stopped.

The bullying was about her teeth which I know she is very self concious about, and although I plan to speak to my dentist again next week, she is still too young for them to start treatment yet.

OP posts:
IllegallyBrunette · 14/11/2008 17:34

I have been sepreated from xp for about 2 1/2 years. Dd2 did take it harder than her siblings as she is generally alot more sensitive.

We have also had recent problems with bullying, but I have spoken to school about it and it does seem to have stopped.

The bullying was about her teeth which I know she is very self concious about, and although I plan to speak to my dentist again next week, she is still too young for them to start treatment yet.

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