to not be ready when exp arrives to collect the kids?

[spookycharlotte121]

I feel ill, have been rushing round trying to get everything ready for them to go because he doesnt have anything at his house for them.... only a travel cot for ds to sleep in.
He said he would collect the kids at 5 which I was happy about because it means they will have tea with their dad and I wont have to cook for them (i thought I might end up puking in the food). He just txt o say he will collect them at half 5 and can I give them tea..... I know ds wont eat dinner untill about 6 so would I be being pathetic to do our normal routine and feed him when he would normally eat and if were not ready then sod the ex. I dont see why ds should have his tea an hour early.... 5 seems very early to do tea. Anyway im waffling. what I want to know is would it be rude to keep him waiting? I know his gf will get funny about it when he goes home. Im too ill to care right now.

Tell him he can a) collect at half six when they've eaten or b) collect at half five and feed them.

Why don't you say half five is fine but ask that he still feeds your DS as that was what was arranged and five is too early to eat?

Afraid I think that being late when it's avoidable and you know it will cause problems is a bit U.

what cornflakegirl said

I think its very unreasonable of you to deliberately keep him waiting when all you have to do is explain why you don't want to feed him at 5 fgs!

Sorry you're feeling ill SC121, hope you're feeling better soon.

to the text he sent "He just txt o say he will collect them at half 5 and can I give them tea" I would text him back and say 'no, teatime is 6, and if he wants you to give them tea, then he will have to wait till after that'.

As I say, hope you're feeling better soon. It sucks being sick when you're a parent.

I know I sound like im trying to be an akward cow but everytime we arrange for him to have them the arrangements change about half a douzen times before he actually collects them. Im just feeling poorly and unable to really cope with confrontation.... he just rang me again to make it later again so I said that suited me as ds doesnt eat tea unill 6 so its sorta resolved itself.

alicet he knows ds eats dinner at 6 he does this all the time. Chops and changes the arrangements for no good reason. Like i say I dont really have the energy to deal with it today because im feeling pretty rough. Now peopple have posted the solution seems so clear but Im feeling cruddy so can i be let off for not having a brain.

YABU, have them ready for 5.30 and just tell him to feed ds at 6, then get thee self to bed.

Ah, i see its resolved, still get yourself to bed when he has gone, and feel better soon

Anglepoise- if ds eats early then he wont sleep through the night but if you leave it too late he gets really tired and wont eat. 6 seems to be the prefect time for him and it means also that its not too early for me to be able to eat with him.
If ds wakes constantly in the night then exp rings me at like 2 in the morning and insists I collect him.... which I refuse to do but its still rather anoying.

I understand you being a bit narky at this when you're ill - I am exactly the same myself.

If you know he is always like this I would store a few stock text replies on your phone so you don't even have to think about it too much. And try (although I know its easier said that done) not to be affected by his crapness and I think you will be more relaxed about it!

Hope you manage not to vomit in ds's dinner now

Ah just seen that ds doesn't sleep through if he eats at 5.

Well what are you waiting for? Give him his dinner now and take the phone off the hook Then he might remember his mealtimes!

I would take the phone off the hook but i worry incase something happend in the night and I was urgently needed. I think Im going to be really lazy and give ds some fruit for dinner.... although he actually loves it when I do this and he can have a youghurt too and then at least I can limit the puking if i dont have to cook.

it'd BVU to keep him waiting when you can simply explain you can't feed him at 5 and he'll have to do it.