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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to be annoyed at ex mil at changing her name from granny to grandma overnight

43 replies

iLoveIceCream · 09/11/2008 21:18

Cutting long story short, I gave them all the choice when I had ds of grandparent names my mum and dad are grandma and grandad and exp's were granny and grandad which was fine, their decision.

However, one of my ds's first words was grandma (or mamar lol) and since then I've noticed her referring to herself as his grandma!

I'm confused should she be allowed to just change her name as she pleases, my ds is 2 in a month and all his baby books, photo albums refer to her as granny as thats what she wanted to be!

AIB really petty that this annoys me? I obviously know it makes no difference in the long term but still............

OP posts:
pointydog · 09/11/2008 21:51

she should have the name she prefers. However, to avoid confusion you need to alter the names a little. Grandma betty and grandma jean is how it's often done/.

And I would be annoyed if the name changed after 2 years, to b e honest. Choose at the beginning and be done with it.

colacubes · 09/11/2008 22:00

????????? seriously, this is an issue???????

littleducks · 09/11/2008 22:01

oh my dh did this, did irritate me briefly that baby books had him with one title then at 2 ish he decided he wanted to be something else, but i ve forgotten now and tbh baby book is less set in stone now

AbbeyA · 09/11/2008 22:06

I think you must have other issues with the woman-it isn't of the least importance!

pointydog · 09/11/2008 22:17

I can't believe all you lot wouldn't be the least bit irritated.

icecream isn't putting this across as a major issue. She is just peeved.

mowbraygirl · 09/11/2008 22:19

My two grand daughters call me Grandma and my son in laws mother is Grannie - must get the spelling right - and her mother is called Great Grannie. She gets very annoyed if one of them forgets and calls her grandma by mistake. They have often called me by the childminders name or even their teachers I know who they mean.

ThePregnantHedgeWitch · 09/11/2008 22:25

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

AbbeyA · 09/11/2008 22:26

DCs often change it from the original anyway.

cory · 09/11/2008 22:48

pointydog on Sun 09-Nov-08 22:17:05
"I can't believe all you lot wouldn't be the least bit irritated."

I probably wouldn't even notice it tbh. We never had a big choose-your-name thing either, we just let it fall into place.

Took years for Grandma to even learn ds's name- in fact we had to give him a nickname because of the mess she made of it- but I can't say that upset me terribly either. It's pretty obvious that she loves him, and that's the bit that matters.

Plonker · 09/11/2008 22:51

Does it really matter?

YABU ...and you know it.

Pointy - wouldn't be irritated in the slightest ...and i'm not the most laid back of people

ummadam · 10/11/2008 09:26

YABU to be annoyed IMO but YANBU to be slightly peeved and roll your eyes!

Your son will still know who is who - both my sets of grandparents have been called Granny and Grandad all my life and I can't remember ever being confused. If we were with them I knew who they were and if we weren't I used the context people were talking about them in to know who there were.

My son's baby book will have me written as Mummy but I doubt that it what he will call me all his life.

VinegarTits · 10/11/2008 09:44

LOL at people who post on aibu then feel attacked when people say yabu, i counted and only 3 people said, yabu, then she cried 'Just forget I posted I didnt come on to be attacked'. you crackpot.

Original poster
iLoveIceCream · 10/11/2008 10:04

Vinegartits, thats just effing insulting calling me a crackpot.

no need

OP posts:
Original poster
iLoveIceCream · 10/11/2008 10:14

I actually did come on here to find out if this was acceptable and I only said it annoyed me slightly, I didn't say I was going to bring it up with her and decide she was no longer seeing my ds.

Find this a lot on here, if you aren't in one of the mn cliques u get shot down and accused of all sorts if people don't agree with you.

None of you know me so all your judgments abpout how I have deeper issues and I must be a crack pot are competely unfounded and I will seriously think twice before posting again for advice

Obviously not aimed at all the posters on here but the ones resorting to insults are just completely bitchy and nasty

OP posts:
VinegarTits · 10/11/2008 10:31

Calm down dear, i shall retract my 'crackpot' statement, as quite obviously you are not

roobarbschmoobarb · 10/11/2008 10:38

Personally i think YABU (and taking the responses to your question a little to heart - i've only been an MNer for a couple of days and have already realised if you're going to post in AIBU you need to be prepared to hear all points of view)

Anyway back to the question....

DCs grandparents names have evolved and changed constantly as the DCs have got older. Now both GMs are Nanny as this is what our children have settled on calling them. Its no big deal surely ...and no more confusing say, than 2 children in their class at school with the same name.

pointydog · 10/11/2008 19:11

evolved and changed as the children get older, up to the gps to decide - blah blah.

The op's mil changed her own name after two years. She's more crackpot than the op. Does it matter in the grand scheme of things? Course not. Does mil sound a little cracked? Yes, slightly, in a small scale and possible cosy eccentric way.

SummerC · 10/11/2008 21:50

I do understand where you are coming from, but I also think YAB just a little U. Not attacking you at all, just my perspective.

Perhaps just let your ds call her what he wishes. There isn't much she can do about what he decides to call her, is there?

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