AIBU Jesus V Santa Not for small eyes

[VereDuckworthsHandbag]

Friends son (child A) had a play date with child B.
While there they were talking about Christmas and child A said it was Jesus birthday, the Mother of child B tells child A there is no Jesus, gave a long list of her reasoning. Child A tells his mother when he gets home, the mother of child A has now told child B that through blatant commercialism and coca cola an image was created from a folk tale and there is no you know who, Child B took this more to heart then child A who still believes in his faith and the rather nice SC who brings him gifts, both mothers are firmly at war now though.

I am parent of child C who is friends with A and B so have had the whole story from both sides.
I do feel attacking someone's religion is worse then attacking someones fairy tale.
Kids are all 7 (and yes mine believe ).

I think is has all got a bit out of hand though and am trying to stay out of the "great debate" that has taken over the play ground, AIBU

Both mothers have behaved badly.

But anyone who thinks that a child's belief in Santa is equivalent to a religion has a fairly poor understanding of religion, history and politics.

Presumably Mother of B should be feelig pity for child A who is still stuck believing a fairytale. At least her child is now enlightened.

both are at fault

there isn't someone who had done a worse thing than the other

telling someones child that their religeon is based on falsehoods is quite frankly abhorrant.

telling somones child that father christmas is a pile of shit - and destroying that innocence of christmas is also abhorrant.

both of them need to have a cold hard look at themselves, nasty, horrible, hearless women, taking out their pathetic venom through little chuilrens belief systems.

cunts

there is no eqivalent bout it, to my child santa is far more important than Jesus, I never feel the nee to argue aout religion with anybody and I understand that every body has their own views. We celebrate Christams as a mid wintr festival to give everyone soething o lok forward to as nights draw in and days get cold, i personally believe that is what Chrismas is and always has been. I could be wrong but I do not wish to have my opinion changed aymore than anybody else. If you thnk my opinions are less valid than anybodyelses than that is sad state of affairs, i for one am happy with what i believe and not not feel the need to influence anybody elses veiws. On the other hand if anybody did something to spoil the magic of a festival that we celebrat I would be very very angry.

The mother of child B was out for revenge - surely much worse and not very Christian.,

Not excusing Mother A at all - no need to have the discussion really, unless of course she said Oh I don't believe it Jesus (which surely is valid) and Child B asked why?

What awful women! We are atheists but I wouldn't dream of talking to someone else's child like that (although I might well have that debate with their parents). Neither would I expect my religious fruit&nut friends to give dd religious instruction.

We do have problems of this kind between the kids - but not the parents! They have destroyed the friendship really - how stupid.

Can you not strike out ampersands then??

Both parents need to grow up not be so nasty.

BOth the mothers are twats. But 'religion' and 'fairy tale' are the same thing, so it's not like the jesusfreak can claim more justification on the grounds that her superstition matters more than the other family's superstition.

OH, and and the winter festival commonly known as Christmas in this country doesn't, in the way it is celebrated, have a lot to do with the christian story (most scholars now think that the correct date would have been march or something) and most of the trappings are a mix of celtic and roman festivals.
But I wouldn't have done this either - my DS is 4 and too young to get into such debates but I mean to allow him to believe that father xmas, Captain Dj off Space Pirates and various mythic figures are all equally real (ie not real, as he gets older) but that some people believe 'special' stories are really true and it's not polite to take the piss out of them.

Would it be inappropriate of me to point out that Santa Claus is Saint Nicholas, a christian saint?

He's a mix of pre-christian winter god stories and a christian saint, and as such, in the modern context, is a christian construct. In the same way as Christmas is itself (oh, and Easter).

I'd have to say (even as an atheist) that on accepted historical evidence that both Jesus and Saint Nicholas existed. It's their current status that I would query.

Either way, both mothers are being very unfair to the children involved, however right they might be about anyone's non-existence.

both mothers were out of order, believing in santa is part of a lot of childrens' christmas.

when my dc were small, i remember one fiercely religious mother telling me that her dc didn't believe in santa, but they did believe in jesus.

dc's in question were 4 years old.

i would try to avoid both mothers in the playground!

Both behaved like brats

both mothers that is ... honestly!!! Are they 12?

Don't know if you've missed soemthing out of original story but Jesus is nothing to do with Coca Cola and blatant commercialism. He is part of the Christian religion and has been around for centuries (hence the terms BC and AD).

Coca Cola has a bearing on why Santa claus wears red and white as opposite to green and white which is what santa Claus traditionally wore prior to coca cola becoming invovled in the twenties (I think).

Anyway I'm an atheist but have taught my children that everyone has their beliefs and they should be respected whatever we beleive. I haven't even told my own children what my religious beleifs are I have jsut told them they need to make up their own mind.

I would be v upset that if someone told my two santa claus didn't exist (aged 4 and 8) but it's not something I would fall out over. I also think it is v rude to be disprespectful about someone's religious beliefs but again not something I'd fall out with the parents over unless they were being rude too.

Sorry should read 'as opposed to' rather than 'as opposite to' !!!

Both these Mothers are out of order, We are Christians and our children believed in Father Christmas when they were small.

They sound vile. If I was the OP, I wouldn't be letting either of them near my children again.

They are both as bad as each other - trying to destroy the child's faith/ trust/ belief is just wrong, whether it is in religion or a folktale. They will have plenty of time later on to decide for themselves.

I don't think you can say that the religion has more validity than the fairy tale - both are equally valid to the children involved.

Best to stay well out of it but I would be considering my options in staying friends with them!

The parents should have stayed out of the children's discussion unless asked directly for an opinion by the children and even then they should have referred them back to their own parents.

They sound pretty immature themselves and not confident in their own belief systems if they have to impose them on young children.

Agree that both mums did a bad thing.

I would be very annoyed if a parent told my DC FC didn't exist (tho DS2 aged 5 is deeply Suspicious).

If someone told them Jesus never existed then I would counter that (as others have here) with the fact that he certainly did - tho who you think he was is another debate.

So I guess I wouldn't be as angry about that - which is odd as Jesus is a lot more important to me than Santa.

I would stay out of it too Vera D.

I'd stay well out of it but make sure that both mothers knew that I'd go mad if my child's beliefs were flattened in such a horible way were my child ever round their house on a playdate!!

And whilst religion is obviously extremely important to a lot of people, to a 7 year old I would say that Father Christmas is top of the list! So to tell a small child that he doesn't exist is, in my book, unforgivable!!

i agree with thomsc that the mum who said santa claus isnt real has basically contradicted the very religion she has been "protecting" saint nicholas is a christian creation which has then been commercialised and the previous meaning stretched and distorted to fit the current needs of the market!! the same way that the stories told of jesus have been distorted to fit the needs of the religion over the years! i dont believe in religion as an organised mindset but i do believe both figure existed at one point in time and are perfectly valid figures to have belief in and both have a nice set of stories to go along with these beliefs.
i dont understand how a person can believe in one invisible figure and express how incredulous it is to believe in another!! (like say jesus exists but santa claus is a ridiculous belief!!)
have these women not seen miricle on 34th street for petes sake??
xx ei xx

I bet they're the sort of women who don't believe in angels either and everyone knows that every time a bell rings an angel gets his wings........

LM i cant read that without a southern accent in my head
xx ei xx

Appalling behaviour. Both women have been petty and unkind.

I gather that the MN prescription in this sort of situation is usually a kick in the fanjo, but the OP should not be the one to administer it.

I know kids aren't stupid, but at age 7 they're still pretty vulnerable, aren't they? What a horrible way to treat them. Both women should be put in the naughty corner and made to apologise.