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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not want my DH to take my 2 DS's (age 6 & 7) into his football teams clubhouse/bar before home matches...

20 replies

josben · 06/11/2008 16:32

My DH goes to every home match that our local team play and our DS's go with him which is all fine but I have asked him to stop taking our DS's into the bar before and after the match as i don;t think it is appropriate that they sit there whilst he has a pint with his mates before and after the match... I don't really want them doing that at there ages - it is a bar that allows children in and so (according to him) they are not the only children that go in there...

Do you think IABU to object to this?

OP posts:
jesuswhatnext · 06/11/2008 16:37

so long as other children are there i think it is ok, (and dh does'nt get plastered)

pigsinmud · 06/11/2008 16:39

If it's one pint, there are other children around and your boys are happy to go then I think it's fine. Club bars are usually quite happy places before a match ... not sure about after!

Original poster
josben · 06/11/2008 16:42

thanks for your response

well he doesn't get plastered or anything. I just think back to when my brother and i were that age - my dad would have never have taken us into a bar - and my dad liked a drink (as do all our family so i'm not being po-faced about haveing a beer [smile)

I'm just not sure its the 'right' thing to do...

OP posts:
2shoes · 06/11/2008 16:47

can't see the harm tbh. dh used to take dd in the pub every friday(was handy as they then fund taised for her)

RubyrubyrubyObama · 06/11/2008 16:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mayorquimby · 06/11/2008 17:05

not a big deal imho

ImaburningHEIFERgy · 06/11/2008 17:34

Well we take our DD (almost 5) into the hockey club bar every week.

We go in after DHs match and stay for a drink (or even 2). Has become a regular thing, DD really enjoys it, she gets to play with other children whilst DH and I get to have a drink and chat. If DH has had 2 beers we leave the car and walk home (via the chips shop).

Tis the closest we get to actually going out on a Saturday evening! .

I would definately want to check out the place myself, it depends on how the adults behave etc, If there was swearing etc then I wouldn't be happy, but our sports club is lovely and very family orientated.

nametaken · 06/11/2008 17:34

I don't think there's anything wrong with it - in todays female dominated education and childcare setting it's good for boys to spend a few hours in an all male environment.

FlirtyThirty · 06/11/2008 17:40

YABU - what can possibly be wrong with a father taking his children out for a day and enjoying spending time with them and his friends? He is only having a pint - not a litre of whisky? I'm sure the boys love it. Can't see what there is to get upset about to be honest...

LilRedWG · 06/11/2008 17:42

DH and DSIL spent every Saturday at the club their dad played for - and absolutely loved it, to the point that they DN's last birthdya party was there. It's lovely that he wants to spend the time with them.

Aimsmum · 06/11/2008 17:43

Message withdrawn

rocketupbum · 06/11/2008 20:19

When I was little i used to go with my dad into the clubhouse after his games and i loved it! It was cool to see him with his mates and there were always other kids to play with. I think it is good for kids to see their parents in (suitable) social environments.

Original poster
josben · 06/11/2008 20:23

Thanks for your responses - it actually makes me feel bit better that noone thinks my boys will grow up to be raging 'alcies' because of this...!

OP posts:
Gunnerbean · 06/11/2008 20:24

I can't see the harm in it. Particuarly as there are other kids there and they don't allow smoking in bars anymore these days either.

Try to draw on the positives here - at least he's not trying to slope off there every week on his own leaving his kids out and is happy to take them, you get a break/time alone and your boys probably enjoy going too. Everyone's happy, so where can the harm be in that?

shatteredmumsrus · 06/11/2008 20:38

my 2 sons go to the club with dp every week and they love it. They dont want to leave as they have made so many friends there

smellyeli · 06/11/2008 20:43

I used to go into the rugby club bar with my sister when my Dad played - we must have been about 6 and 7 - we used to love it! I think the guys made a real effort not to swear and not be rowdy, and we used to have a lemonade and a packet of crisps - such a treat. This was 30 years ago, and it still sticks with me as a really happy time - it's great for Dads to do things with their kids.

cat64 · 06/11/2008 20:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

GypsyMoth · 06/11/2008 20:51

why not go along too? my daughter plays for a team...we all happily meet up there. they do food and sell coffee too in our clubhouse.

Original poster
josben · 06/11/2008 20:57

Well, I now feel like a bit of a moaning minnie - i guess that i am lucky that DH really WANTS his sons with him at the footie... (we also have a 2 year old DD so its not poss for me go along too.)

This thread has made me realise that I probably have been making a fuss over something that isn't bad at all

OP posts:
Kimi · 06/11/2008 21:06

Sorry but I think YABU it is dad and boys time and as long as he is not rolling about drunk what harm does it do.

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