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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

It seems you cannot win, even when you park right at the back of the carpark.

74 replies

BackToBasics · 05/11/2008 17:21

Today i took my dd swimming. I drove into the carpark and there were no spaces near the swimming centre, the front and the middle of the carpark was pretty full so i decided to park right at the back where there were loads of spaces, i don't mind walking.

I parked in a bay with an empty space next to me, then there was the bushes next to that space. Perfect for me as i needed the room to get dd out, i am heavily pregnant too so lifting her out is easier for me if i can open her door wide.

An hour later i get back to the car to find some plank has parked right next to me. There were still loads of spaces empty but they decided to park next to me!

So i flipped in their wing mirror so i could open dds door a bit wider and the woman who owned the car appeared and shouted at me.

"You've broken my wing mirror!" she shouted.

I explained to her that it wasn't broken, it flips back into position and that i needed to flip it down to get my door open wider to put dd in.

Then i asked her why she had parked right next to me when there were loads of empty spaces and she said "I can park where i bloody like, there are p&t spaces over there, why don't you use one?"

I said "because they are all full and i choose to park here so i would have plenty of room."

Then she just gave me a filthy look and got in her car.

So if you fight the good fight for a p&t space it's the wrong thing to do and if you choose to park at the back then that's wrong too. You just cannot win!

OP posts:

Original poster

BackToBasics · 05/11/2008 18:36

She hadn't even used the smimming pool anyway. People often use the carpark to park for free because it's right opposite a hospital (where you have to pay) and that's what direction she came from.

OP posts:

catweazle · 05/11/2008 18:36

The people saying OP is BU does this mean you park next to lone cars in otherwise empty carparks? If so, can I ask why?

SalBySea · 05/11/2008 18:37

I prefer to park next to parked cars than spaces cause then I can make sure I leave enough space. If I park beside a space people come along and block me in so that I can barely open the door.

Original poster

BackToBasics · 05/11/2008 18:38

catweazle i suspect they are the people who park next you in an empty carpark. Any normal person would think why would do that?

OP posts:

Original poster

BackToBasics · 05/11/2008 18:40

salbysea why not just park at the end of a row so no one can park next to you?

OP posts:

Hodgins · 05/11/2008 18:41

Sorry, slightly off subject but it's like when you sit in a fairly empty cinema, there are loads of seats and someone comes and sits right in front of you - weird!!!!

YANBU BTW

SalBySea · 05/11/2008 18:43

if that option is available I take it

It wouldnt matter if other people were able to park properly - but many are not so I'd rather be the one in control of how far away I am from the next car rather than leave it up to the next idiot who pulls up next to me and thinks "that'll do"

does it matter if I park next to people if I park PROPERLY, in a straight line and leave enough space

Original poster

BackToBasics · 05/11/2008 19:00

It just seems bizarre to me that anyone would park next to another car in an empty carpark?

The small gap thing isn't an issue when i'm not pregnant because i have sqeezed in my car many a time through a small gap because someone has parked too close. I have even been known to put dd in the car through the other side because i couldn't even get her door open.

In this case though, the woman could clearly see why i had flipped her mirror and could see i was heavily pregnant and could see i was struggling to get dd in the car. Yet she still shouted at me, didn't appoligise for parking to close and was generally rude and selfish. I just hope next time she thinks twice about how close she parks to the person next to her, although i doubt it.

OP posts:

MsSparkle · 05/11/2008 19:14

This is why they should widen all parking spaces. In most carparks the spacing isn't designed for modern cars but are designed for when the average car was alot smaller and narrower. I'm not even talking about the size of a 4X4 that we have today, most average cars are alot bigger than 20 odd years ago were.

catweazle · 05/11/2008 19:58

salbysea what's to stop the person you've parked next to moving and someone else coming along? I find that a very odd reason for parking next to someone instead of in an area of empty spaces. Perhaps that is why somebody always parks in next to me when I've gone to a lot of trouble to park as far away as I can from everyone else. Luckily I now have a 19mo and can legitimately park in P&T spaces again

Hodgkins I get that too! or immediately behind you, especially when they are laden with buckets of popcorn and bagfuls of rustling sweets

compo · 05/11/2008 19:59

I think she was rude because she didn't like you meddling with her mirror
Did you see her coming? Couldn't you have waited for her to pull out first?

Original poster

BackToBasics · 05/11/2008 20:04

I was just lifting dd into the car when she appeared from the walkway that leads from the hospital. It wasn't worth me waiting for her to pull away because i already had dd in the car.

I think it's fine to flip someones wing mirror down if it means you won't damage it. Better that then breaking it.

OP posts:

mabanana · 05/11/2008 20:08

oh silly cow. Try to ignore her. I know it's hard.

Lubyloo · 05/11/2008 20:13

YANBU. It is ridiculous to park next to a car when there are lots of empty places. It drives me mad when people do that. If I notice a child seat in a car I always make an effort not to park too close and have trained DH to do the same!

I went to Aldi today and parked in a parent and child space to discover that they have completely missed the point of them - they are exactly the same width as the other spaces!

mashedbanana · 05/11/2008 20:14

someone parked right next to me in sainsburys car park even though it was 8.30 in the morning and there were loads of spaces.i couldn't get in on drivers side so had to get in passenger side and clamber over.not easy when your 8 months pregnant

theSuburbanDryad · 05/11/2008 20:29

On a different - but related - note, when I was barely pg with ds (and therefore feeling extremely grumpy and sick) I used to go down to Surrey on the train to visit dh (before he was my dh!) as we were still living apart then. One time, some bloody businessman came and sat right next to me in a completely empty carriage and proceeded to bray down his mobile phone!

I had been eating a sandwich, but due to sudden nausea was unable to finish it, and so slipped the soggy crusts into the pockets of his suit jacket somewhere between Bletchley and Leighton Buzzard.

Not really relevant to the OP, but I've been waiting some time to get that off my chest. (One of you is going to come on and say, "That was my dh you bitch!!")

handbagqueen · 05/11/2008 20:38

When I was 8 month pregnant and huge with DD2 I popped to the shops - parked at the end of a row. When I returned to my car another car had parked so close to me there was no way I could get in and move my car, I was not able to get in the passenger side and climb across as I was too pregnant. In the end I had to stand around until I saw a thin man passing and asked him if he could move my car.

I couldn't beleive that someone could be so thoughtless as to park not in a marked bay and to park so close to the drivers door that it is impossible for the driver to get into the car.

Bride1 · 05/11/2008 20:52

theSub.Dryad, that is so funny!

Lotster · 06/11/2008 15:21

That IS hilarious Dryad! As is poor Handbag having to stand around waiting for a "thin" man! ]

Am ROFL...

Simplysally · 06/11/2008 15:29

Why didn't you open the car door on the other side and get in that way? Was that not possible rather than move the wing mirror?

TBH, I'd probably snap at someone who'd moved my wing mirror even if it was the for the best of intentions. She may not have seen you were pg or even realised.

PuppyMonkey · 06/11/2008 15:37

I can't believe people get so precious about their car's wing mirrors!

Simplysally · 06/11/2008 15:40

Maybe she'd had her wing mirrors damaged before and that is why she snapped?

It may not have been her car as well - she may have borrowed or hired it and so didn't know you can move the mirrors.

GrimmaTheNome · 06/11/2008 15:48

Well to be fair if she'd just come from the hospital she might have been worked up for other reasons and the OP was a convenient excuse to blow up.

Wing mirrors intruding on parking spaces or
footpaths ought to be flipped as a matter of
princple though . And parking less than a full doors width from a car with a child seat if theres plenty of room is just inconsiderate.

Original poster

BackToBasics · 06/11/2008 16:52

"Why didn't you open the car door on the other side and get in that way? Was that not possible rather than move the wing mirror?"

Well because i am heavily pregnant! I can bearly lift dd in the car as it is. Does it honestly sound like i can get her in through the other side? This morning i couldn't lean down far enough to put my socks on that's how big my bump is!

Plus moving the wing mirror is really not the crime of the century! They pop back in the exact same position so i really don't see what the fuss is all about? Had i opened the car door and broke the womans wing mirror, then i could see why there would be cause for alarm.

OP posts:

Simplysally · 06/11/2008 17:12

I don't know - I would have thought once you're in the car, you're in, regardless of what side you got in. You still have to lift your dd in whichever side you get in.

FWIW, I don't think my wing mirrors move on my car so I'd have to take the chance on them being smashed if I parked (too) close to another car.

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