AIBU to be offended? Please make me feel better!

[sparklylucy]

My MIL lives next door. In the past I have invited her and FIL and GFIL aged 93 over, she has declined and says it is because GFIL gets settled and doesn't like moving .Fair enough, at that age you can do what you want. However last year SIL invited them all up (1.5 hours drive away). MIL said Oh well haven't told GFIL yet but he doesn't mind, he'll do whatever.I asked what made it easier for him to move 1.5 hours drive away(for the day)compared to next door and got no straight answer. This year I get the same story. I just wish she would be honest- are my kids awful compared to their cousins? Does she not like the food? Do I give in and go there for lunch again or dig my heels in and have seperate lunches next door to each other?????? AIBU to want to know the real reason

what a pain. But there is no point searching for the real reason (it could just be something spurious or the fact they see you all the time?), just reassure yourself that you and your house/food are fine.

That does seem very odd to me!
I think I would be wondering to if there was something wrong that your MIL won't come to your house!

YANBU
Enjoy your own space (assuming this is Christmas Day) I'd love for us to be able to

I am assuming you are inviting them for xmas lunch? maybe they just want a change of scenery, after all they live next door so you must see them quite often? maybe getting away from her house and the area is why she takes up the offer, why not try suggesting you all go out somewhere for lunch, a resturant maybe?

This is the same MIL who came to babysit the other day, gave the kids a bath but nipped home to get her own towels to use for them,(also brings a flask with her, god im not that unhygienic))Thanks everyone

i think you should move!

omg

I think that you should keep a diary of what she does and either
a) share it with her and ask her to explain her actions or
b) sell it as a sitcom as she sounds hilarious

You MIL sounds like a compete nightmare. Would go with lunch in neighbouring houses.

Sadly I can't move as DH is farmer . She is so off this planet that everyone else just ignores her and does their own thing anyway. Its hard to do that when she interferes with the way i do things with the kids though. I like the diary idea , thanks. She is likely however to say that I made it up! Am tempted by seperate lunches but it feels a bit scroogy, and on the other hand, sod it I won't have to cook.

You've answered your own question: she is off the planet so don't be offended by what she says or does.
Maybe she feels that she sees you more often than your SIL. Maybe she just prefers your SIL and is prepared to make the effort.
Don't worry about it and enjoy not having to cook!