To be upset that my PIL have never taken a photo of my children

[ooohtututnaughtyme]

They have a camera, yet they have never taken a photo of my children, not even when they were born. I'm i being unreasonable to think that's strange and to be upset by this?

I politely approached the subject once and asked my MIL if they have a camera (when i was showing her some photo's i'd taken of the children) she replied she really must bring it round sometime and take some. She did say my FIL was the one who took the photo's as she was no good at taking them. Is that really an excuse to never take any photo's of their grandchildren She occassionally asks me to send her some that i've taken, which i do for my parents too, but they also take thir own.

To top it all she has now asked that for her christmas present she would like a framed picture of my children because she doesn't have an up to date one.

YABU - maybe they just don't like taking photos - some of this is a generational thing I think. Tbh if this is the only thing you have to worry about as far as in-laws are concerned then you should think yourself lucky

My Ils never took photos of their own los, let alone mine. Hasn't prevented them from loving them to bits, though. And the pictures we send have pride of place on the mantelpiece, so can't really complain. Some people just aren't into photography. As long as they're into their grandchildren I really couldn't care less

YANBU to be upset. Of course you are not, that is the way you feel about it. It isn't WRONG to feel upset by anything!

My pils are exactly the same. I could have written your op. But recently - the last time they came to visit (we live on the other side of the world fgs) they had bought a new digi camera - shock horror and did use it a BIT. usually its fil who is actually not dh's dad, but step dad who takes them. she hardly ever ever does. it used to wind me but now i realise that it's just them and the way their family has always been. they have practically no pics of dh when he was growing up. in fact there is one album and we have it.

my parents otoh go ott. way ott.

pils do ask for pics and i send them regularly.

tis odd i find

yabu...at least they spend time with your DC

My PIL can't even be arsed to do that, feckers!

I rarely take photos, it just doesn't occur to me and I have to make an effort to remember for the DC's parties etc. I think mine possibly is a reaction who had an addiction to taking (very bad quality) photos.

I think it is a mistake to equate one fairly marginal type of behaviour, like taking photographs, with loving and then saying 'you can't love him as you should because you are not doing X'. There are probably things that they equate with love that you wouldn't be doing with your ds- does that mean they can say you don't love your ds? Of course not. So cut them a bit of slack, and let them express their love in whatever way comes naturally to them.

Some people just aren't photo takers. We are terrible!

My MIL will take photos of DS but she takes photos of everyone. My Mum wouldn't know how to use a camera. My Dad used to be really into photography when we were kids but isn't so much now. Has a good camera but forgets to charge it generally.

My parents have a camera but just never really use it. Even on holiday they only take about 3 pictures. DH and his family are avid photographers - DH is very good - and they take lots of photos. We give nice photos of DS to my parents and they will get a framed one for Christmas.

Surely it's much more important that your parents want to see your DC and love them rather than counting how many photos they take. Would you even be saying this if it was your parents rather than your PIL who didn't take photos? So I think YABVU.

YABU

Providing they are interested in their grandchildren (and on the basis they have asked for photos from you, I would assume they are), then there is really no issue.

DD has 4 sets of GP's - some take lots of pics, some a few and 2 sets have never taken any. I've never seen it as an indication of who loves her the most though

YABU, at least your PIL take an interet in your DC, mine cannot be arsed with DD, which TBH doesn't really bother me but I know it upsets DH.

Whoever said baout doing a yearly photo album for the grandparents, I like that. I am going to do that for xmas. Excellent and cheap xmas pressy for GP's.

Sone people just aren't photo people. I've never even managed to sit down at look at all my own wedding photos, and must admit that I've only ever taken three photos of dd and dh together... I do mean to but never want to tear myself away from the moment to faff with a camera.

My PIL are exactly the same.

We bought them a "normal" camera a few years ago (one with film and stuff) and it has never ever been used - not for the children, not for any of their holidays, nothing. But we get the same requests for us to bring photos of the children (and they get a copy of the annual playgroup picture).

SFIL's son has a daughter the same age as DD2, and he has obviously felt the same, because they now also have a digital camera (bought by SFIL's son), however they can't work that. Now I know why that is - they asked my DH how to use it and he made it far far too complicated ("look you can do this, and then this, and if you want you can do this, and you can print out your phots this way, or on a machine, or send the card away, and you can do that in this shop and the supermarket and the post office and then you can do this."....it is the same with their freeview box. - he really needed to say "press that button and when you want print outs, give us the camera and we'll do it").

I think they are both very much of the theory that taking pictures is hard and complicated, and printing them out, on either film or digitally is complicated and expensive.

So, we have to just let them get on with it - its their memories they aren't preserving for themselves. They get the playgroup pictures and the baby pictures every time they get taken, and they always put them up - but they never ever take any themselves.

YABU.

Don't see the problem. You have plenty of photos that you can give them. Why do they need to take their own?

(Pagwatch - my husband exactly same as yours. He never takes photos. Doesn't even know how to turn the camera on!)

What an odd thread. Not everyone is a 'photo person', they don't take their camera everywhere or even think about taking photos that often.

As a family we don't take that many photos, not compared to other people. We tend not to have many out on display either, whereas other people seem to fill their homes with them.

Your in-laws seemingly like the photos they do have of your children and have even asked for one for Christmas. That's great!

I actually find it more irritating when people document every nano-second of their children's lives in film or photo, or are more intent photographing/videoing something than actually watching or talking to or playing with the children. School plays are a good example!

I think you should be very grateful.
We made a decision early on not to video everything, it is more important to live life at the time. e.g watch the Christmas Play not record it-interact when they open presents-not watch from behind a camera.

you think not taking photos is bad??? LOL DP's mother has never visited ds2 and the only photos she has seen are the ones i have emailed her oh and the only message we got regarding ds2 was that dp was unfair bringing a child into the world at his time of life..... now go on have a guess at his age lmao