Plesae don't read this - it's just me being mildly annoyed....

[captainmummy]

At my next-door neighbours girl. SHe is 11 and so full of her own importance. Yesterday she came downstairs (she treats the house as hers, BTW) complaining (weak and wibbly voice) 'DS2 has been spraying his underarm deodorant and I haven't got my inhaler' Honestly I would almost expect a back-of-the-hand to the brow. Stupid DS2, using his own underarm, in his own bedroom, in his own house. Anyway, DS3 comes in later from her house (he was invited, I might add) stinking of airfreshener, which she has liberally sprayed him with.

And she ignores me when I suggest it's hometime, if she's on the nintendo. Unless I shout, at which she will sigh loudly, and peel herself off the sofa, then spend 15 minutes looking for coat/shoes/keys/glasses.

She walks into MY house and says 'oh ds3 has had a haircut! Looks stupid' when I did it yesterday.

She will walk into MY house and see a friend of one of the boys, and demand 'what are YOU doing here?'

She was invited to a haloween do (in a field) and turned up in shoes with heels. When I suggested she would get cold feet, I'm told 'I don't get cold feet. I don't know why, just don't' so I said well they will get muddy 'oh I'll wash them' 'well you will be uncoomfortable 'oh I never get uncomfortable. Don't know whay I jsut don't' OK then. Later that evening, guess what...

She winds the dses up, but they still play with her, it's just that sometimes I want ot prick her self-absorbed, self-important bubbles and scream 'for gods sake, you ARE NOT ALL THAT!!!!!!!'

Thank you.

I quite like the sound of her actually She sounds like some evil French and Saunders character! ( Btw MorrisZapp, I like your name, it made me smile!)

Ah, sorry- i thought maybe her mum used a certain tones of voice wuith her... v tired today, apologies. You might be right, of course we don;t know. She sounds like an only child though!

No she's not an only child, (altho her sister is 7 years younger than her) and I'm sure she gets lots of attention at home, tooo much maybe. Maybe she jsut expects everyone to drop everything and listen to her words of crap wisdom, and clap when she says something profound - like yesterday when she told me they have a 'really vicious fox' in the garden, (it had dug up the body of their rabbit - the one it had killed the week before) and when I said 'oh yes I've seen the fox, it runs through our garden too' she said oh no this one is a mega-fox, the one you saw is probably a normal fox. Everything is mega for her, everyone else's experiences are second-rate.

I just need to rant a bit, she shouldn't wind me up so bloody much, she's 11 for god sake. When she;s 16 and looking at me with those half-closed eyes they grow into at that age (the you-are-so-lame-i'm-surprised-you-can-get-out-of-bed-in-the-mornings ones) I'll look back and laugh.

catherinewheel

Next time she is cheeky or naughty just say "silly little girl" to her, they hate being called silly little girls. It will really wind her up. You could throw in a sarcastic laugh too for good measure.

when I said 'oh yes I've seen the fox, it runs through our garden too' - but that sounds like you are competing, you have it to be the adult. Tell her firmly "There are no mega foxes, sad though it is that your rabbit was killed. And don't use Mega all the time, try and be more inventive when you are here. Think of another word"

In a few years time she will not come round, she will be grunting and walking around her shoulders hunched over and wearing goth makeup and possibly hanging out with some local chavs. You won't even get a glimmer of recognition from her as you wave and ask if she is having a Mega time.

DaphneMoon You are about as mature as me!!

Waltzy - I wasn't trying to complete with her! I jsut said it runs through our garden too (we are right next-door fgs) and just communicating with her. She is the one who turns it into a competition. She told me she was a vegetarian, but wanted sausage rolls with the dc the other day. she's is not veggie - fav food = chicken.

She told me this year that her sister started school after easter, (This was in Feb). When I pointed out that easter is different every year, I got 'well I say it's Easter now because the daffodils are out.'

You are making me giggle so much, I know I should sympathise but - she is really twisting your melon, isn't she?

Yep -shes her at the mo, walked in saying can I stay here while mum goes to get xxx from wherever. I suppose I could say no, but her mum has already gone!

Hang on I'm going to go listen to what pearls she has to say today!

This girl sounds like a lot of fun, full of nonsense and very spirited. I don't get the issue to be honest.

@ BitofFun

She is not full of FUN morris!!! In fact she is the most dour-faced, un-teasable child in the world! Really!

Next door had a party in the summer, francesca decided to sing a song she'd learnt in church. She sat at the head of a group of chairs and started to sing. Then stopped, and said 'you are not listening to me' and waited until everyone stopped having fun and listened to her singing. That's sweet you might think, but it wasn't. It was precocious and dreadful, and she really thinks she's be a winner in the X factor.

There is not an ounce of nonsense or frivolity in her. If there was I would love her! But everything she says is deadly serious. It is not Easter, becasue she says so.

Does counting your blessings that you are not her mother help?

She does sound a bit troubled and lonely to me. She's obviously getting something from your company that she's not getting at home, or more likely, school. The bit about her reminiscing about your house when it was the old lady's house was quite sad!

Having said that, she would probably drive me up the wall too. You need to be firm about what times she is allowed to stay until, and pull her up on her rudeness. Don't turn it into a massive sermon, but let her know you are Not Amused.
How well do you get on with her parents?

I think she would make a good character in a book. You should write it all down. I am sorry to snigger at your pain. Was only teasing about the competing thing, but you should read this back when you she is not twisting your melon - like the phrase BOF.

Sounds like precious Peaches Geldof

She has jsut gone - I called her at 5.10 to go home, not reallising that her mum wasn't even back yet! I'm not really irritated waltzy, I am a bit frizzed tho. That's why I started this thread, mostly to give myself a bit of a laugh.

Clanger - I get on great with her mum (the dad is a bit humourless tho) and she tells people how she has the best neighbours in the area. Not sure if we do!