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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To be really fed up with parents who don't bother with car seats/let their children sit in the front of the car?

66 replies

BananaSkin · 02/11/2008 19:30

There seem to be loads around here. I think they justify it by assuming that because we live in a city, traffic doesn't move that fast. Some wear it as some sort of badge of honour though, as though being a risk-taker with your children is something to be proud of and something that we neurotic types should consider.

It doesn't normally affect me directly, but it did a couple of weeks ago when a Father turned up to pick up my DC and was about to drive off without DC in a childseat.

OP posts:

needmorecoffee · 02/11/2008 19:33

thought it was against the law?

ALMummy · 02/11/2008 19:36

I can't understand why anyone ever would.

I do remember as a child bouncing around with my toddler sister in the back of the car on all car journeys no matter how long. How we all survived the 70's I will never know.

Original poster

BananaSkin · 02/11/2008 19:38

Well ... yes, it is, isn't it? The Paediatric mother of my child's friend doesn't even use a seat - it makes me so cross. OK the child is quite tall, but it can't do any harm using a booster seat can it?

That's the other thing actually, we use a full car seat still and will continue to do so. I don't think I know another family that do this with their 7 yr olds. I just don't understand why.

OP posts:

MatNanPlus · 02/11/2008 19:39

I am used to it, am based in Sicily and the child seat in the back is for show the child/ren are usually standing in the front passenger footwell or 'helping' drive the car.

If they are in a seat it is usually because they are too small to sit up alone and only 1 adult in the car.

Same with tiny babies - professional guessimate is less than 3 month old - sqished between mom and pop on a moped!!

feedthegoat · 02/11/2008 19:40

I saw someone last week sit their dc in car seat but not bother fastening the harness! Don't understand why you would take the risk. But then I don't understand why some adults are so reluctant to use belts either.

noonki · 02/11/2008 19:47

feedthegoat - my neighbours do this will their kids, lazy bastards.

My DH is a paramedic and all of the worse deaths/horrific injuries of kids have been not strapped in (especially teenagers in the back)

StewieGriffinsMom · 02/11/2008 19:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Hulababy · 02/11/2008 20:02

Madness. Why would anyone want to risk their child's life in such a needless way?

Original poster

BananaSkin · 02/11/2008 20:02

Meant Paediatric doctor in my earlier post ...

OP posts:

Blondeshavemorefun · 02/11/2008 20:50

this seriously pisses me off

there is no need - and most of the time, parents wear belts, but obv think so little of their child

why would you risk your child

you may think you are a safe driver, etc,but only takes one stupid prat/drunk/young/old/on the phone driver and your child can DIE

staryeyed · 02/11/2008 21:02

Oh this thread remind me of something I saw last week that really shocked me. I saw a car with what looked like a person running along side it in the middle of the road. I thought it was very strange and dangerous- very busy road but then I realised it wasn't as I had thought but a small boy standing on the back seat with his head stuck out the window!

kiddiz · 02/11/2008 21:10

As the mother of a child born with a disability who still, many years on, finds it very hard to live with the guilt that his disability might have been caused by something I did, I have no idea how parents whose children are killed or injured because they couldn't be bothered to fasten their children into a car seat or use a seat belt live with the guilt. One mum used to regularly drive past me and my dd walking to school with her young child stood on the front passenger seat with an unused car seat in the back.

Cheesesarnie · 02/11/2008 21:14

yanbu.does my head in.just want to yell-whhhhy?????

LynetteScavo · 02/11/2008 21:19

YANBU - to be honest I haven't seen anything like this in a long time.

People used to offer me lifts when DS1 was little and I didn't have a car. They seemed to think I was insane to walk a mile and a half, rather than travel with DS not strapped in.

Blondeshavemorefun · 02/11/2008 21:23

kiddiz - you cant blame yourself for your childs disabilty (hug)

pushchair · 02/11/2008 21:27

Mil has tried this in the past with mine but got extremely short shrift. Seems really keen to get DD1 off her booster seat-"surely she is tall enough now"

bigmouthstrikesagain · 02/11/2008 22:48

yanbu at all. I have a dilemma at the moment as I have to put my ds in front of car as we now have a 3rd child - 3 car seats will not sit next to each other safely in the back. I would far rather ds was not in front but have to accept we cannot sit the 3 seats together. I face sitting in the middle back seat without much space for my huge behind as well. Dh has to disable the airbag at the front as well.

It may have been possible to keep them all in back if we used a booster rather than a full car seat for ds but he is only 4 (though v tall) and I want him in full seat for as long as possible.

Original poster

BananaSkin · 02/11/2008 23:36

Bigmouth - we changed to a very boring Peugeot Partner (like a Citroen Berlingo) because of this - loads of space in the back and very cheap etc.

OP posts:

MamaG · 02/11/2008 23:47

bigmouth I face this dilemma but my oldest is 9

Have had to accept that she'll sit in the middle with no seat (which goes against everything) but she IS 9 and only 3 cm smaller than the height allowed to sit without a seat.
Apparently oldest child CAN sit int eh middle with no seat if you really can't fit one in.

But I agree, I wouldn't do it with a 4 yo, am only doing it given DD's age/height

oldnewmummy · 03/11/2008 07:42

You should live in Singapore. It's the law to put kids in a car seat but LOADS of people hold small babies loose on their laps in the front seat and the police do nothing.

We dragged a car seat to Thailand to use on a weekend away for DS (nearly 2). Got lots of strange looks as people whizzed by with their toddlers loose on mopeds.

Boysboysboys · 03/11/2008 08:42

I was mentioned to someone that it was illegal for her 3yo DD to not be in a car seat. Her response was that it was OK as she had tinted windows so the police couldn't see in!

pushchair · 03/11/2008 08:50

Now my DD1 is nine and just at the height-does she need to be in a booster still? Am under pressure from her and mil. We dont have a car so any car trips are in mils car and DD gets car sick. so mil plays this off to me as a reason for her to stop using booster.

MamaG · 03/11/2008 09:50

pushchair I think your DD will get MORE carseat out of a booster than in it.

My DD also gets car sick, but it is eased by her being able to see out of hte windows of hte car.

Tell DD that she'll be worse out of hte booster and tell your MIL to keep her nose out!

Blondeshavemorefun · 03/11/2008 10:01

omg boys

your friend was more concerned that police couldnt see what she was doing - rather than her actions could seriously harm orkill her child

pushchair · 03/11/2008 10:13

Luckily mil trips getting fewer and further between since petrol prices and credit crunch hit. But yeah that was one of my argunents.

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