to want to kill the nursery teachers!!!!

[dsrplus8]

my ds4 has just had to have facial surgery to repair damage to his mouth and gums.got a phonecall from the nursery saying that ds4 had fell over and had a wee cut on his mouth.when we arived to take him home one of the nursery teachers was attending him.she was wiping the wee ones face with a baby wipe!!!! no school nurse in sight and they didnt have it noted in the accident diary.clearly my sons accident was more serious than first thought,but baby wipes are not sterile and shouldnt be used.was told ds4 fell over.am furious with their lack of care and want to remove twins from the nursery. ds4 twin sister (dd4)has sn and has a lot of her salts at the nursery and her own teacher/assistant which took ages to arrange.what do i do? am i over reacting???

I understand how upset you are - there is nothing worse than seeing one of your children ill!
But I think you are fixating on "blaming" soemthing or someone - please dont get all het up over the wipes - the human mouth is the filthiest most germ ridden thing (worse than animals) and really they shouldnt have been poking around in his mouth anyway so maybe they were just wiping the blood away outside his mouth - it is hard to judge a mouth injury if you are untrained (as you showed trying dentist etc first, if it was that bad why didnt you just hotfoot it to A+E - not being nasty just pointing out perhaps why they didnt go all out)....
Calm down and then talk to them - if something is amiss then well and good deal with it - but this MAY just have been an unfortunate accident with noone to blame - take care!

As a parent with a child at playgorup if one child hurt themselves I would expect one adult to care for them but the other adults to carry on caring for the other children. If that involved continuing to cook with them so be it. It would have negligent of them to drop everything to attend to just your child and ignore the others.
They may not have written in the accident book by the time you got there as they wanted your child cared for by you before the carer went and wrote in the book. As heated says, paperwork can wait.
As for killing them...

The surgery was a result of the injury though wasnt it? Nothing to do with them using a baby wipe.
It sounds like the damage was inside his mouth, so the baby wipe was being used to clean the blood from his face, a baby wipe sounds like an appropriate thing to use for that.
The accident book could wait until your DS was sorted out surely? Yes, it needs to be done, but waiting until your DSs immediate needs are seen to until they do the accident book is better IMO.

YANBU to be very upset immediately after your retutn from hospital, although wanting to kill them is a little extreme - a similar injury maybe .

However although adrenalin kicks in when our children are distressed YABU if you don't then realise that you need to calm down before you take any action.

nanynick put the priorities very clearly.

My concern is that this was a head injury to a pre-school aged child, for which the nursery did not call for medical help. While it may not have been a life threatening injury, it could have been far worse - for example the child could have gone into shock, the child could have sustained concussion (or compression). Head injuries to pre-school children do happen quite often and usually there is no lasting damage. However in some cases it can result in permanent damage to the head/brain/face.
Clearly none of us where there at the time, so we do not know what happened or the precise state the casualty was in when they were found. However if the lip had a hole in it (did it go right through?) then seeking medial advice, even if just from NHS Direct (if say the lip had a hole which wasn't all the way through) in my view should have been done.
So a question I would ask the school is why wasn't medical advise obtained? Do they have procedures in place for dealing with children who sustain a head injury?

My view is that if the injury is minor, call NHS Direct for advice.
If the child went unconscious at any point, for even a few seconds, call an ambulance. Also call an ambulance if there is bodily discharge from eyes/ears/skull.
Mouth injuries are hard to determine how serious they are, but an experienced first aider should in my view be able to determine if it is a minor bit lip, or if it is more serious - and if any doubt they should seek medical advice.

In this instance, you obtained the medical advice, not the nursery... I am thus concerned why the nursery didn't.

Nannynick, I'd be eternally on the phone to NHS if I called everytime DS fell and hit his head/bit into his lip or tounge etc etc.

My dd had to have some stitches in her face too after a fall. They have to use GA because small children wriggle otherwise. They always use the maxfac team on faces because they dont want to cause a bigger scar than necessary on a face. Small children fall over, it's what they do. It's frightening having your child go under GA and I can understand why you're upset, but I don't think killing the nursery staff will help. Just be thankful your ds is fine and you have access to such great medical care.

I think you have to ask what would you have done differently had it happened at home ? They had other children to attend to in the same way as you would, maybe the cakes had already gone in the oven so there was a risk of burning nto to remove them. Do you have sterile stuff to hand at home, because I'm sure I would have just grabbed the nearest appropriate thing (in fact I know I did when ds fell and cut his ear) to stem any bleeding.

I realise this has been quite traumatic for you and your ds and you are understandably shocked but agree things like actually noting it down in the accident book , within 20 minutes of it happening whilst someone was still attending to your ds may have been unrealistic. As to further risks due to using a wipe, I'm sure the injury will have been well cleaned out by the surgeon before treating it.

My DD cut her leg badly on the beach, i just grabbed the first thing i could out of her bag and that happened to be a pair of spare knickers. In these sort of incidents it is not about being sterile, obviously you are not going to grap the toilet cloth but babywipes should have been fine. The most important thing would have been stemming any blood flow and calming DS down. The time for sterile is when the wound is being cleaned up ready to be closed, either by stitches or other method. The mouth is a hotbed of bacteria, so an unsterile babywipe is really not an issue.

I think the OPs concern is valid though, i would be concerned if there was no one first aid trained on site? Am i to understand this to be the case? The thing is, children split their lips all the time, so maybe the nursery underestimated how serious it was? They sound like they did the right thing, called mum in and i imagine you took him off to A+E? I'm not sure what they could have done differently really or would have done even if they had a doctor on site tbh.

When my DD cut her leg, i was in two minds whether to take her to minor injuries, i think the only reason i did is because i had nothing with me to clean it properly and i had to walk right past it on my way home, otherwise i would have dealt with it at home, as it was, i think i made the right call as it had to be glued and steri-stripped, but to be honest, i really don't think it would have been in the end of the world if i stuck a plaster on it at home tbh.

I think the OP reaction was perfectly natural, you can't help to feel angry if your child injures themselves in someone elese care, if they are with you, you feel angry with yourself. But in retrospect, i think that i would ask to see the accident recorded in the injuries book, i can't imagine this would be otherwise as they called you in.