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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

......to let DS1 pee in public???

43 replies

Tryharder · 30/10/2008 20:53

Well, am I????

He's just turned 4, not had the easiest of times toilet training. When we are out and about, he sometimes needs to wee and if there are no public toilets around, I say he can wee in a bush or down a drain or something. I mean, when he needs a wee, he needs one iyswim - he can't wait till we get home.

Anyway, he was doing a wee in a hedge the other day, on a fairly quiet street. The hedge bordered on an allotment and there was a lady digging there who gave me and DS1 the filthiest look. Ds1 was quite upset by it and kept asking why the lady was so cross with him?

I can't believe that anyone is really offended by a little boy peeing or is that just me???

OP posts:

Fizzylemonade · 31/10/2008 11:05

We have a 1/2 mile walk home from school through a residential estate and then some open field things and I get ds1 to try to hold it until the field but there have been times when he has to go on the grass verge.

I just try to get him to face away from the houses

He is 5 but cannot hold it for any length of time.

I do stash a plastic green bottle under the pram so that he can pee into that.

I find it hard to explain that he doesn't need to drop his pants to his ankles and flash his naked bottom

It is true about dogs, they piss up walls and lamposts at least there is aiming involved with little boys.

Perfectly fine for wee boys to wee outdoors (and girls)

malfoy · 31/10/2008 11:07

DS -also 4- wees in public regularly. I try to make him do it down a drain. He has absolutely no shame, stands by the side of the road, trousers and pants round his ankles peeing into drains.

jasmeeen · 31/10/2008 11:53

I disagree with most posters on this thread. I do appreciate that there are those occasions when you have no alternative but to let your kid pee outside but it being a regular thing is not ok.

ohIdoliketobebesidethe · 31/10/2008 11:57

YANBU - I hope not anyway. Have same problem with dd1 who is 3.5 and I can't see it improving before she is 4. I feel terrible about getting it when she goes outside - esp as it's so cold- but all the cajoling in the world does not get her to go when it's convenient. The more I cajole the more she refuses.

mumof2222222222222222boys · 31/10/2008 12:13

YANBU. My DS1 (4.2) is exactly the same. Normally he is fab and accidents are rare. I remind him to go to the loo frequently. However, on occasions he forgets and he needs a wee NOW. "It's coming out mummy". This probably happens once every 6 weeks and the time is lengthening. I wouldn't class it as a regular thing and am definitely not enouraging him to widdle everywhere.

DS2 (22 months) had his first wee on the potty this morning !!! So it will all stasrt again

Flynnie · 01/11/2008 09:37

My dd is 3 and able to manage most times to wait until we find a toilet.
Maybe you should think about investing in a travel potty if this is such a regular occurrence.

elsiepiddock · 01/11/2008 09:44

When my ds were at that can't hold on phase, when about 3, I used to carry a small empty plastic bottle around for them to pee into in an emergency. I still keep one in the car.

I think this is preferable to peeing into people's hedges.

Mind you, I was in Nice recently sitting in a park and a woman who was about 60 squatted down in the bushes !

vjg13 · 01/11/2008 10:05

YABU I think a travel potty is a much better idea.

My older child has special needs so have had experience of this.

kslatts · 01/11/2008 10:16

YANBU - I can't really understand why it would bother anyone.

findtheriver · 01/11/2008 10:47

Agree with vjg. As a rare occurrence it may be ok, but to let your child believe that it's ok to pee in people's hedges etc as a regular thing is not on. Not fair on other people and not fair on your child either.

AbbaFan · 01/11/2008 10:57

YANBU

I have 2 boys, and they have both done the same when needs must.

Mumi · 01/11/2008 10:59

YANBU. Any port in a storm!

vjg13 · 01/11/2008 11:06

Maybe this is why you see (pissed up) blokes peeing everywhere because their mums felt it was fine!

Original poster

Tryharder · 01/11/2008 14:54

It's not that I think it's "fine" vjg, but if it's a choice between DS1 wetting himself or discreetly peeing in a hedge then I'd rather the latter. But I take all your points on board. Will consider taking a plastic bottle out with me next time!

OP posts:

loobeylou · 01/11/2008 16:00

I have a funny story about this

BIL and SIL took my nephew then 5 on the london eye. He waits till they are right up the top then needs a wee. SIL has a nearly full 500ml bottle of water. She made BIL drink it so DS could wee in it! Guess who was running for the loo as soon as they landed! (Don't think the other tourists would have appreciested BIL doing the same as his son!!)

Actually, round here we have a huge problem with lorry drivers parking in places they should not while coming/going from channel ports and leaving bottles of wee all over the verges. If you are taking it away to dispose of, thats fine. Dumping it in public places is much more gross than doing it in the hedge IMHO

Quattrocento · 01/11/2008 16:10

Mine never did this. Not that I would have let them wee in public in any event. Might it be worth taking your DS to the doctors to have his bladder checked out?

TheFallenMadonna · 01/11/2008 16:21

Apparently DH went through a stage of only weeing against a certain tree in PIL's garden. Nowhere elsae

DS will wee in our compost heap on our allotment, but not if anyone's looking (he's 7).

How close was the woman?

allytjd · 01/11/2008 20:27

I had to do a wee on my allotment, only cover available was my raspberry canes (before I had a shed), I crouched down gingerly only to sting my rear on some nettles and then while standing up to pull jeans up made eye contact and excrutiatingly polite chat with old man on plot next door who had silently turned up.
could have been worse DS1 did a poo in a bookshop that somehow rolled down his trouser leg and got trodden into the gaps int the wooden flooring!

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