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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to not go on holiday with the dh and kids at 3am in the morning.

27 replies

soultaken · 27/10/2008 17:26

I had a tooth infection so had to have an extraction on Wednesday. Then the infection got worse so I'm now on 2 different lots of powerful anti-biotics plus ibuprofen plus paracetamol.

I feel awful - my face is swollen, one of the side effects of the drug is to make me feel nauseous. I am exhausted. I run the ship here from 10 o clock sunday night till 6 o clock friday night single handedly with no help from work-away dh with the 3 kids. I feel that this has a huge bearing on my feeing so ill now.

I don't know what to do. I honestly cannot bear the thought of the trip to the airport, the flight, the travelling blah blah blah.

To make matters worse dh is being a fucking miserable bastard because he has to pack the kids stuff (that I washed and ironed). I'm probably gonna be ill abroad and he'll be miserable coz I'm ill, like i'm doing it on purpose.

If I dont go it will be about £400 wasted (the cost of my flight). The accommodation price will stay the same.

Am I being a selfish bitch. I just think it's about time I put myself first. I dunno

OP posts:
LouMacca · 27/10/2008 17:29

Oh no, what a nightmare for you! Have been there myself so know how awful it is.

Where are you supposed to be going and for how long?

If you are on 2 lots of powerful antibiotics things should start to improve in the next couple of days.

jammi · 27/10/2008 17:30

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

Original poster
soultaken · 27/10/2008 17:33

I feel like crying. The thing is, I've been on the anti-biotics since Saturday but I think the sick feeling is caused by them. Will they kick in soon?

Kids are 8, 9 and 10. 2 hour flight for 5 nights.

OP posts:
piratecat · 27/10/2008 17:37

the sick thing is probably the whole stress/exhaustion you under.

i sympathise, i had a tooth extraction 2 weeks ago, after 2 weeks of agony.

Being on so many pills isn't going to help feelings of nausea tho. Are you sure you have enough anitbiotics to last? Or rather how much longer will you have to take them?

LolaTheShowgirl · 27/10/2008 17:37

Men are so fcking selfish! Tell the b@stard he's going alone whether he likes it or not while you have some free time and you can pretend you're not a mummy for 5 nights and relax, have fluffy, bubbly baths and read all the good mags while sipping a luxury hot chocolate!

piratecat · 27/10/2008 17:38

where are you going?

Original poster
soultaken · 27/10/2008 17:41

Portugal. I have taken 3 days worth of AB - 4 days left to go.

OP posts:
JackOLANTERNstini · 27/10/2008 17:41

Depends - is he the kind of person that will refuse to go if you don't? Would be awful for the kids then.
Does he realise how selfish he is being? Sounds like this might be a 'last straw' moment - are you pissed off in general with how the workload is split? Do feel for you

Original poster
soultaken · 27/10/2008 17:43

I am pissed off in general with him, but to be honest, that is an argument for another day. He will go with the kids.

OP posts:
jammi · 27/10/2008 17:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

slayerette · 27/10/2008 17:51

TBH, I think you should go if you can - your kids will be upset if you don't, surely? And if my DH pulled out of a holiday abroad at the last minute, leaving me to manage three kids on my own at the airport, getting to accommodation and so on, I'd be pretty fed up.

Lots of sympathy for you feeling so crap but the ABs should kick in soon and once you get there and get settled in, hopefully he can keep an eye on the kids playing while you get some rest.

tigermoth · 27/10/2008 17:54

what slayerette said

LazyLinePainterJane · 27/10/2008 18:00

If I were feeling as shit as you, DH would offer to take the children alone. The money is irrelevant, you have already paid, the money is gone. Imagine if someone offered you £400 to go on holiday, feeling as you are? Would you take it? If so, then you should go, if not, then it's not worth it and you clearly feel terrible.

It is not as if your children are toddlers. I would be shocked if a grown man could not deal with them for 5 days, after all, you do the same every single week.

Original poster
soultaken · 27/10/2008 18:09

where can I find a weather report?

OP posts:
Original poster
soultaken · 27/10/2008 18:11

just found the weather report

fucking rainy and cloudy

OP posts:
compo · 27/10/2008 18:11

I know this isn't waht you want to hear but it is just one of those things us parents have to do, don't let the kids down .
Go, paint a smile on your face, pretend there is a video camera on you and look like you are having fun
A break might be just what you need

Trafficcone · 27/10/2008 18:13

Frankly, I think you need to just 'suck it up' and get on with it. You'll more than likely be right as rain in a few days and as slayerette said, if anyones Dh did that to them and just dropped out the day before a family holiday MNers would be baying for blood.

Eniddo · 27/10/2008 18:15

of course you have to go

when are you leaving?

Eniddo · 27/10/2008 18:16

I went on holiday with three kids at 4am on a FERRY for 5 hours then a 10 hour drive with a badly broken foot (I didnt actually drive I hasten to add)

suck it up.

mysteryfairy · 27/10/2008 18:17

Do you have travel insurance? Sounds like you have a case where you could cancel the whole thing and get all your money back less the excess. Then you could both take the children somewhere nice and sunny when you are feeling better.

Two of my three children are older than yours (littlie is younger) and I've got to admit I'd be pretty thrown to have them abroad on my own for 6 days. I suspect DH would find them easier at home too, although he'd probably do it if he had to.

compo · 27/10/2008 18:18

no don't cancel
the kids will be so disappointed

mysteryfairy · 27/10/2008 18:22

If Dad works away through the week they might be quite glad to have a few days at home with him though.

bellavita · 27/10/2008 18:24

Don't cancel your holiday, I am sure the antibiotics will kick in soon. I bet if you don't go, as soon as the plane has taken off you will start to feel better and wish you had of gone.

Original poster
soultaken · 27/10/2008 19:13

thanks everyone for your support. I have decided to go. Hopefully these bloody ABs will start to work soon.

OP posts:
cheshirekitty · 27/10/2008 19:41

Can you put a warm pack onto your face, or warm flannal. It may help the pain.

Don't cancel your hols. The abs should start kicking in soon.