to not be particularly happy about cooking Christmas dinner for 18 people on Christmas day?

[luckymummy74]

That would be 8 adults and 10 kids aged between 1 and 16 yrs of age. It will involve 3 highchairs ( I have one).

Also, 4 veggies (not that I'm anti-veggie, on the contrary, I eat a lot of veggie food) but 2 eat fish and 2 don't, so I will have to cook 3 separate meals in total.

A lot of the kids are quite fussy too.....

I don't really have room in my house for this many people.

DH thinks I'm being unreasonable that I'm not very enthusiastic about this.....

Any thoughts, or tips to how to get thru the day?!!!

OMG: I'd do it, but they'd probably not want to come again and I'd be grateful.

Not too cheap, but do you know that M&S do the ingredients for Christmas dinner in various foil containers that you shove in the oven and there's no washing up. You need to order in advance though.

Agree about getting people to help. Prepare as much in advance as you can. Personally I wouldn't bother with starters, just the main meal and pud, turkey and 1 vegetarian option, same veg for everyone. And just make it clear to everyone in the nicest possible way that its your christmas too and everyone should muck in.

When my MIL used to do christmas, she enjoyed the cooking and didn't want any help but we always cleared and washed up. When we do christmas and any other big meals, I cook and everyone watches while DH washes and clears up Need some assertivenes training I think

My kids are fussy but I would never expect anyone to do something special for them. They eat what they will, leave what they won't and get on with it.

If money's not an issue just do a big m&s shop for veg - its practically ready to go in the pan.

"I think I will spend Christmas eve peeling veg!!! "

no - your husband/partner who has invited these people over will be spending christmas eve peeling veg.

Simple!

[Hhmm]

Go for long walk leaving note on table: 'your dinner's in the carrier bags'?

Pre-prepared veg is a good idea - but get it delivered and do your order early - the shops will be hell for the 2 days before.

Sorry I did realise after I posted what I wrote I should know better since my Uncle does all the cooking for about 15 people at Christmas!

But my DP's side of the family only the women cook.

i'm with Stewies, get them to bring a dish.

email round a list and they sign up for what they want to bring.

and phrase it as compulsory rather than optional.

your DH is being a git for having invited that many people without your agreement.

so i'd buy everything they're not bringing ready made at M&S and throwaway cutlery and plates.

he's lucky he's got you and not me, because if my DH even suggested that many folks coming over for Xmas he'd have only met with laughter on my part.

Just don't.

You didn't invite them, don't cook a roast dinner for them. tell them now that you are NOT cooking, then they probably won't come.

we are taught so insiduously and insistantly that nice little girls play nicely, and don't say "no, Teddy, you can NOT have any more tea. I'm sick of feeding you, you greedy bastard!" that this habit remains into adulthood. we begrudgingly churn out baadly cooked banquets in the name of Perfect Wife-ism.

Just say NO.

Nice girls do say no. they just say no nicely.

Well to be fair to DH, he didn't just do it behind my back or anything, he knows better!! But he just kept going on and on and on about it, until (I feel) I had no choice. I have known him 10 years and never had them all over for Christmas day, I have had them all over Boxing Day a few times, I can handle that, just a buffet!So anyway, he feels it's our turn. I can see his point, but I'm just not looking forward to it!

I can't really afford the M&S veg, not fo rthat many people! I'm on mat leave at the mo so not getting paid much.

I will definitley get them all to bring something.

MIL is very family orientated (not that I'm not!) and I know she will want us all sitting together...at the same time.....

Why did you agree to do it?

we do xmas day like tracy said she does, in her post. i provide veg, pud and most of the drink. others bring stuffing, cheese and bics, turkey etc.

i always say that i am happy to provide the venue, but other than that its a team effort. agree with email idea. get 'em to sign up now!

I had to agree to it in the end. Believe me, it was very begrudgingly!! I can see DHs point....his sisters and Mum have done it every other year, we have never had them all here. I just really don't feel I can go on just merrily going to them for Christmas dinner and never doing it myself...surely that would be unreasonable??!!

Anyway, thank-you all, I have got some great tips, and I feel that I am not being that unreasonable, as I didn't have lots of YABU replies!!!!

do a vege curry you'll find you dont have the numbers next year!

stewie There is the MIL law!!!!

I did this last year and it was really OK.

If I was you I'd get someone to do started and desserts and everyone to bring drinks. Maybe someone to bring crakers/nibbles too.

The food for us wasn't too difficult. I did turkey, nut loaf (M&S) and all the trimmings. I did oven roast veg (all chopped the night before) and red cabbage (made weeks in advance and frozen then zapped in the microwave). I did easy puds that you can make in advance (there's a lovely choc torte in delia's christmas book that you can freeze) and I shamelessly microwaved a tesco finest christmas pud. Probably did a pavlova as well.

I wouldn't do 3 sep meals, I'd do the above and expect the kids to pick. I always do chiplotas which surely most kids love?!

I'd do "starter" on platters in the lounge while the children play/potter. Keeps the meal a bit shorter for the kids.

10 kids is a lot - top tip would be to use a white paper table cloth and hand out crayons mid way though dinner and let then draw on the table.

I'm still at 18 people. Where will they all sit? Do you actually have 18 plates? How big is your kitchen?

we borrowed tables and chairs from church

i would have cutlery and dishes for 18 but not chairs!