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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To want to run this kid over with my buggy?

26 replies

ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:31

Yes I know that I am but this is the third time my ds has come home with a nasty mark on his face from this horror of a child.

We saw him in the bank a couple of days ago and he was grinning and pulling mean faces at ds. I gave him my "Looks" and he just carried on. So in effect was harassing my child right in front of me. His mother doesnt speak English so I couldn't speak to her. We see them most days and I just really feel like giving him a good dig with my rather hefty buggy containing my rather hefty two year old next time I see him.

OP posts:
thisisyesterday · 22/10/2008 20:34

erm, yes, kids pull faces. they think it's funny.
i pull faces at people sometimes too. mostly dp and ds. because I think it's funnyt and so do they.

what's a "mean" face?

if you don't like it just ignore him and tell ds to do the same.
if you have to do "something" then say to him "that isn't very nice, is it?" and a look.

Original poster
ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:35

Mean faces accompanied by big fist and scratch marks on the face are what I am talking about.

The faces alone would of course not bother me.

OP posts:
Twelvelegs · 22/10/2008 20:37

How old is the child?

thisisyesterday · 22/10/2008 20:38

how old are they??

Original poster
ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:38

He is 6.

OP posts:
compo · 22/10/2008 20:39

speak to the teacher?

Original poster
ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:40

My DS is 5 and has HFA. He is a gentle soul and does not understand when he is hit he wouldnt even consider hitting back it just wouldnt occur to him. This has been confirmed by his school.

OP posts:
KatieDD · 22/10/2008 20:40

What's the school got to say about it ? I'm sure there are other ways of dealing with it.

thisisyesterday · 22/10/2008 20:43

well I would speak to the teacher, she must have some way of communicating with the parents, even if they don't speak english

Original poster
ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:45

Oh the school are pretty good and always let us know when there has been an "incident". They say they are dealing with it but it takes time. However this is the third mark this term and I know that DS gets chased around by this child and his friends, I only know this because I have to drag it out of DS. He would never tell me of his own accord. That is what hurts me so much about all this.

Please be sure I would not ever consider harming this child in reality. It was just seeing his nasty, taunting face yesterday made me really want to say or do something. I hate thinking ds is having to deal with this every day.

OP posts:
Cheesesarnie · 22/10/2008 20:47

keep on at school-go to head.ds1 was being bullied recently and it took repeated complaints from us for them to do something.

kettlechip · 22/10/2008 20:50

Feel for you ALMummy, ds has suspected HFA and is also a gentle little thing. The strength of the protective feelings I have towards him scare me sometimes.

thisisyesterday · 22/10/2008 20:51

ok you need to go in and be more assertive with them
"it takes time" is NOT on. your child has a right to be safe at school.
not to be chased
not to be scratched
not to be hit

if they cannot provide that then tell them you will take him out of school until they can.
this needs to stop NOW.

crap that it takes time. it takes the teacher to keep an eye on this boy and make sure he isn't near your son.

MrsMattie · 22/10/2008 20:54

The school should deal with this appropriately. It's not on. But...this kid is 6 yrs old. Think you should get it in perspective.

Twelvelegs · 22/10/2008 20:55

The school is not doing it's job if your child is not safe.

Original poster
ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:55

We do. They are just so, so nice there and I know that they are trying to deal with things in the same way that we have been so grateful for when they dealt with DS and his HFA - ie not just dismissing it as him being naughty etc, looking for reasons, really going out of their way to get him help etc.

We went to a class birthday party last year and saw this child attack and punch twice in the head the child sitting next to him for no apparent reason, with real ferocity. Sure this child has his own issues but I feel very helpless.

OP posts:
Cheesesarnie · 22/10/2008 20:56

can i ask what hfa is?(sorry probably really obvious but im poorly!)

Original poster
ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:58

kettlechip, does your ds not tell you ANYTHING? Mine never says anything about what is happening to him. I can't stand it. He comes home with bruises and marks on him and won't say a thing unless I interrogate him. I hate thinking that he just accepts that this is what happens at school and that is just how it is.

OP posts:
Original poster
ALMummy · 22/10/2008 20:59

High Functioning Autism.

OP posts:
Cheesesarnie · 22/10/2008 20:59

ahhh thankyou.

thisisyesterday · 22/10/2008 21:00

high functioning autism

Cheesesarnie · 22/10/2008 22:08

sorry i killed your thread

pushchair · 22/10/2008 22:22

Only read title but I say Yes go right ahead.

kettlechip · 23/10/2008 15:41

hi again, alMummy, no he doesn't tell me anything yet as he's only just turned 3 and still getting to grips with speech tbh. He's in nursery still, and very protected there, but I do worry about later school.

pingping · 23/10/2008 15:49

Ram him I would ram him hard in the back of the ankles and then give him the look that says dont fuck with me or my child