AIBU to get annoyed when I hear the word "illegitimate" bandied about on Ugly Betty and Desperate Housewives??

[Liffey]

I never read it or hear it on GB/Irish newspapers TV shows. To my ear it sounds shockingly dated. I think it's quite a nasty little word.

Both times I heard the word on US tv shows, it was used quite disparagingly. By Lynette Scavo (not MN LS!) to describe her husband's child prior to their marriage, and on Ugly Betty, to describe Daniel Meade's son who he knew nothing about.

In some ways the Americans are so careful with their choice of words. They call a babysitter a childcare provider.

But the scriptwriters obviously know what's acceptable in US society, and this is deemed OK. I am absolutely shocked. Even in holy catholic Ireland this would be perceived as being a nasty dig at children who can't control whether or not their parents were married or not.

OK. I'll try and calm down a bit now. Maybe I should watch fewer American TV shows and read a good book.

'I bet if you're children were born outside of a marriage you'd agree that is is more than just a word.'

a) I probably wouldn't have noticed, which makes me think perhaps Aitch's previous post has a point b) I wouldn't have cared, tbh.

I've got a lot of things to get wound up about besides TV.

But it's a free country, so feel free to get wound up about it.

You're talking about challenging a TV show imported from another country where it's just a legal term and PC gone mad pretty much rules the roost because they're sue happy.

But knock yourself out.

STEWIE, what will the neighbours say?!

I don't think there's anything offensive about 'illegitimate'. The 'legit' means legal. A child born out of wedlock in the past did not automatically enjoy the same rights of inheritance or the automatic right to be supported by it's father. Even now a mother who is not married can't put the father's name put on the birth certificate if he's not there in person to sign.

Its a word. Sticks and stones and all that....

It isn't a big deal anymore, that is correct so that is why the term illegitimate is nonsense. My daughter is every bit as legitimate as my son. And if they weren't their father's children then he wouldn't be able to take me to court to try and get residency anyway. So it's meaningless in today's society anyway, just an insult at the end of the day.

If it means nothing to you expatinscotland, why are you so determined to drive me into the ground here? It upsets me, not for no reason, but for good reason.

I have a feeling I'm not the only person in the World that feels put out by that phrase.

Aitch, it's not anger. It's shock and sadness to be precise.

Look, I think if someone referred to your dd in that way, as a dig at the fact you and her father weren't married when she was born, then that would be pretty crappy. Which is sort of the point. The characters were being a bit crappy.

It has the same legal implications here (England) as well SGM.

amen, FM. they were doing it to be mean.

and you have said 'annoyed' in the subject line, to be fair, liffey. so that sounds angry.

I am an illegitamate child as is my own son. I get bent out of shape less about words and more about attitudes...rightly or wrongly.

Words can be amibiguous, but when you get down to the nitty gritty and listen to people's viewpoints - thats when you lay bare the predjudices.

Ho Hum.

'If it means nothing to you expatinscotland, why are you so determined to drive me into the ground here? It upsets me, not for no reason, but for good reason. '

YOU ASKED AIBU!? YES, yes you are! Because it upsets you for no good reason!

Don't ask if you don't want to hear it warts and all.

People use 'bastard' here in Scotland A LOT. With no regard for whether someone was born out of wedlock or not and without even knowing.

Those fuckwits.

I have a illegitamate child-the actual word doesn't phase me-it's a word,means born out of wedlock,just a word.Now if you said bastard child and directed it at my child,that may rile fuckmeoff . I hear the word 'bastard' spoken all the time-the colourful english language and all it's glory!.

Anyway,as I said before those programmes are dire-switch off and read or something.

Well, it certainly sounds better than 'cunt', Stewies, which is also common enough here .

My mistake was posting it on this board, because it's not unreasonable to get upset about a comment which is offensive.

I know I am entitled to an opinion and entitled to decide if something is wrong. B

I was trying to highlight the problem.

I was told that I was unreasonable. My opinions were quoted back to me and disected, as though I were wrong.

Anyway, I'm relieved (and proud) that the Irish government removed the word from their constitution in 1984. I don't know how long it will take, but with 40% of children in the UK born out of wedlock, I predict this term will be defunct within 20 years in USA too. There isn't an aristocracy system there. People can leave their estates to whoever they choose, and parentage can be shown on a birth cert or proved or disproved via DNA.

I am NOT anti-marriage by the way. I still think it is 'the idea'. But labelling people for something outside of their control isn't right.