A sil issue

[cupsoftea]

My sil & her two kids ages 16&8 will be visiting us soon. She has told dh she'll be going to a school reunion. I asked dh if we'll be looking after her 8yr whilst she's away for a day & evening. Her eldest is 16 so he can do his own thing.

Dh said she hadn't mentioned anything about her kids. How can she have decided what she's doing but not have a plan for her kids? She's dumped her kids on us on holiday but this was at her parents house so not my place but I wont let her do this in my home.

Spoke to dh & he thinks it reasonable not to have thought yet of what to do with her kids

over 500 messages contain the full words - fuck off - to be clear I used the abbreviation ftfo rather than a mumsnet expression

I've not read your other threads but tbh i think it is common courtesy to let you know if she plans on leaving her dss with you/at your house while she goes out, how can she not!? Is she just assuming they'll be looked after?

j2o - it seems that she just thinks that we'll look after them - which we'll do but I just think it's a bit rich to just arrive & then for her to go out until late that night without saying first - I'll be leaving dss with you. It's just the coutesy.

dh will talk to her this weekend probably so he'll ask her if she's taking them to the school reunion.

(whispers) I've been trying to work it out - what's the ft stand for in ftfo? (By the way... I'm embarrassed about that post yesterday - lesson learnt - I will re-read everything I write on here before posting in future as it was too harsh.)

I don't see why you should put yourself out for sil at all and certainly shouldn't cancel your children's activities for which you have presumably paid.
Does she ever look after your children ? Does she behave like an 'aunt' to them ?
Perhaps you should test her and ask her 16 year old to babysit your kids so you can have an evening out

idling - good idea! but tbh I'd worry but that's my fault.

She doesn't play with them or really talk to them at all. They don't mind as too busy doing their thing. At meal times she spends her time telling her ds to eat up - sometimes has a go at my kids as well for this. I always say - I think they're had enough or whatever.

When I come into the sitting room she'll continue to read her mag/book without even acknowledging that I'm there.

She sounds a right baggage! Poor you. Does your DH get where you are coming from on this and does he support you?