To rant at Waitrose

[Lucifera]

There have been quite a few threads on the topic of the "gendering" of products for children, all-pink for girls, all-cammo for boys, etc, so I'm encouraged to think that some of you won't think IWBU to send this email to Waitrose:
I picked up a copy of your "entertaining" brochure in a store at the weekend, and was pretty shocked at your suggestions for party food and ranges of cakes for children. So the girls get Barbie and princesses while the boys have football and pirates? You even have sex-segregated menus - for heaven's sake! Do the children you know only invite other boys or other girls to their parties? Not even their sisters or brothers?
I am completely sick of the way everything for children is gendered these days, from nappies to bikes - and now food! I'd expected better of your company.
I imagine you will tell me it's what parents and children want. It seems to me they don't get a choice.

Message withdrawn

You don't have to buy their stuff you know.

They could make everything in a sort of beige or yellow I suppose but I suspect that boys will still want cars and trains and girls will want fluffy things.

lol

Suspect it's the 'pirates are for boys' that Lucifera is objecting to. Me too. Had a little girl to play with ds who refused EVERYTHING in his dressing up box because there were no fairy or princess costumes. Apparently girls can't be pirates or doctors or train drivers or knights anything else.

So I bought a pink fairy costume at the school fete and ds really loves it, dresses up in it at any opportunity. He's clearly comfortable with his feminine side, shame the little girls are so stereotyped.

All this pink is for girls is SO socially determined.

EVERY little girl who has come to play has loved ds's train set, btw. I feel sorry for them not having train sets of their own. Miserable parents.

As long as you don't rant in Waitrose.

Strikes me as un-Waitrose behaviour and may result in your being taken away.

I sympathise though.

That's it, Edam, I have no problem with girls liking pink and fairies and boys liking trains and spaceships; it's just the way these are constantly presented as the only possible options. And you only have to read some of the posts on Mumsnet about "should I let my son have a pink pushchair" or "I can't put his older sister's pink bibs on my new baby boy" to realise how very uncomfortable many people are about the possibility of their sons being mistaken for girls, or having any kind of "feminine" accoutrements. Back in the dim distant past when I was a child, yes we had dolls and train sets and they were to some extent "reserved" for girls or for boys. But most toys and lots of clothes were produced in nice bright primary colours; you didn't have to think "is this for a boy or a girl?" about every sodding purchase.

Fair enough to email them, but language like 'for heaven's sake' and 'I am completely sick' are OTT and what you might use if they were stocking Playboy plates for little girls.

Maybe moderate it a bit and make the point less emotively. It's not a big deal really.

Quite. Pink wasn't such a big thing either - it's all marketing. My Sindy had lots of different clothes in all sorts of colours. And my party dresses were NOT pink. Very girl and flowery but not pink. It just wasn't promoted or sold or seen as necessary.

Mind you, I LONGED for a Girl's World thing where you could do hair and make up and my mother would not let me near one on feminist grounds.

It's not unreasonable to group the cakes boy/girl. Very few boys will want a pink princess cake. Only a few girls would want pirates etc. There is, of course, nothing to stop people just buying the cake their child wants, regardless of gender.

Personally I think the world has one mad with all the things people complain about when they really don't matter.

Cod that post made me laugh. Went on a school trip with ds2's class a while ago and had three girls and ds2 in my group. They kept elbowing poor ds2 out of the way to try and hold my hand ("wouldn't you like to have me as your little girl instead of that horrible, dirty boy...euuuk, boys are so horrid" - OK, they didn't quite say that, I'm exaggerating) and they kept stroking my hair and my clothes and saying how lovely they were and how pretty I was...aaarrggghhh, I kept wanting to go "Gerrofff! Stop fiddling with me!"

But WHY group them? Why not just have a page of birthday cakes? Children are free to choose whatever cake they like, why do they have to be TOLD which ones are suitable?

Actually now I come to think of it, ds does have some girl friends who are very touchy and it makes me really uncomfortable. Holding hands while walking, find, touching hair or arms or excessive snuggling - yuck.

LL I like the sound of that small girl - I assume she has already read The Night Pirates?

From personal experience, I'd say that little girls want stereotypically girly things (not necessarily pink) AND trains. Mine likes necklaces and pretty female characters and Thomas the TE and cars and helicopters. At the age of 2, it's very easy to buy her the boys' stuff, especially Thomas themed stuff which doesn't seem very boyish, and she likes that best. But when you get older and toddler, the boy/girl division gets uglier and naffer - the boys stuff looks all military and the girls stuff is puke pink. My problem, really, is not with the gender branding, although I don't approve of it, it's the ghastliness of everything. Kids have to take what they get, so I think they should design stuff I would like.

Or you could go to a proper cake maker and that way you can design what you want for the cake instead of going to a supermarket. Supermarkets are taking away business from independant cake makers.

So unfortunatly, if you want a cake for £10, you have to put up with princesses and pirates. Otherwise you have to pay the proper price for a professional to do it.

Rant over.

why are you so bothered?

Does your ds want a princess cake? you don't have to produce proof that you have a boy/girl when buying a particular cake you know.

When I was a child I had a train set, and a remote controlled car, and a farm yard. Dolls were and still are boring boring boring IMO.

MsSparkle, I wasn't shopping for a cake, and will be making one myself for gs birthday! But of course better to go to independent cake maker rather than a supermarket.
Of course the font colour I used in my email to Waitrose was green!!

I always loved Barbies when I was little AND cars, and wore blue dresses, red dungarees, as well as a fetching pegasus jumper. I caught frogs in jars and cuddled my Care Bear.
My sister hated Barbies though, no, she loved My Little Pony. And dinosaurs!
I avoid dressing DS entirely in blue, I like orange, brown, red, green, yellow - all the other colours out there.
That being said, if he ever gets a little sister I will knit lots of pink cardigans, to go with all the monster/car/monkey themed t-shirts we'll have left-over.

xx

I loved dolls houses and train sets when I was a little girl. I can't wait to get ds a train set but he also likes playing with the kitchen/tea party stuff at the toy library, as do other little boys.

And I fear I'm never going to have a dd, but I would get her a trainset if I did.