to think that my DSs should be allowed to eat what I give them at breaktime?

[lonelymom]

My DSs school seems to have an unwritten rule that they are ONLY allowed fruit at breaktime. Problem is one of my DSs only eats bananas unsupervised. Any other fruit and I have to stand over him saying 'Git it down yer throat NOW!'. Anyway as his bananas have been coming home uneaten and bashed (even though he has a 'bananaguard' being the height of coolness that he is) I started to give him 'schoolbars' and apple crisps but he is coming home saying that his teacher will not let him eat them and he has to put them back in his bag . Now come on - these are a form of fruit , they contain lots of fruit anyway. I am furious about the apple crisps as these are essentially dried apple slices dipped in lemon juice. I have spoken to his teacher about this a few times and she has said that it's OK so I don't know what the hells going on. This nanny state we live in makes me bloody angry. I am a grown adult who should be able to decide what my kid eats!! If I want to give him a Mars Bar, I should be able to, fgs. By the way, my other DS (in a different class) gets to eat his.

ha ha I didn't mean physically ..

I am not missing the point. Just reflect how silly this would sound in the local paper!

Anytown Primary School is proud to have a Healthy School's Silver Award and are working towards their Gold Award, which they hope to receive by the end of this term. They have a very successfully changed to a fruit only policy at break time. The infants receive free fruit and juniors bring their own or are allowed to buy it at the start of the day. The teacher's find that it aids the childrens concentration. It has the additional advantage of leaving no litter, the staff and children have developed a school garden and all the fruit waste goes into a compost bin.
The whole policy is now being challenged by a new parent. Mrs X says "I am paying for my child's snack, how dare the school tell me which food I must send in at break. My child has a healthy balanced diet and as part of that I will send her in with a chocolate bar if I choose". I am not against fruit but I am against being told that I must send fruit.

Lonelymom, you chose your school because it was the nearest. You in that case stick to the rules that it makes!

A school can make it own rules about what happens during the school day. I make my own rules in my home. If a DC arrived with candy floss on a stick I would give them two choices.

1. Eat it in the garden before you come in and wash your hands before you touch anything.
2. I will look after it, you can wash your hands and have it back when you go home.

I wouldn't expect to have the mother
complaining that I was being dictatorial and unreasonable!

The school is saying eat what you like but finish it before you come into school or keep it until hometime. I fail to see anything remotely unreasonable about that.

I don't know about anecdotal evidence in Scotland but I know what I see at school. There is no waste, certain DCs always ask for a second piece and I spend my time telling them to wait a few minutes to see if everyone has had a piece. There is rarely anything left. Scotland is notorious

for having one of the worst diets in the world! They need to be encouraged to eat more fruit!
Sorry -pressed button before I finished!

Hilarious, this 'I am manning the barricades and going to the wire for this vitally important principle of freedom and human rights! I am determined to rebel whatever teh personal cost!'
'Gosh, that sounds impressive! What is this hugely important issue?'
'I am insisting on my right for my children to eat chocolate/cheese instead of an apple as a breaktime snack'
'Oh...right'

It's not exactly up there with Rosa Parkes or Martin Luther King, is it?

I think Scotland is the only place that does deep fried Mars Bars. (I could be wrong but you definitely couldn't get one in my town!)

My dd has just started nursery, and I am delighted that they are not allowed anything other than fruit as a snack as I never have the stamina not to offer something else if she doesn't want it. I think it's a good way of making here realise that sometimes, just sometimes, she needs to eat what is given, if she's hungry.

AbbeyA, I will say this very slowly and using words of one syllable.

If the school provides the snack then I am perfectly happy for them to provide only fruit.

If, on the other hand, the parent is expected to provide (not just pay for)the snack then the school does not have the right to insist that only fruit is provided.

Encouragement is not best achieved by force. I refer you to my previous posts in which I explained how I think those whose diet needs most improvement might be supported and facilitated.

mabanana, I am quite well aware that this is not the most earthshattering issue on the planet. Nevertheless, I see a matter of principle here - about parental authority, not about fruit, btw.

And Rosa Parkes sat in a different seat on a bus. Don't you think some of those white folks might have though "FGS, at least she's allowed on the bus. Why is she making a fuss over something so unimportant?"

You will find MsHighwater that the school has the right to insist on the snack that you send in.
I will say slowly with words of one syllable: the school will take your DDs snack off her and send it home at the end of the day.

There is absolutely nothing you can do about it other than complain to the Head and Governors. If they don't give in to your selfish demands request (which means abandoning the fruit only policy for all children) your only course of action is to remove your DD from the school. I should make sure of the policy before you send her to the school.

I think apartheid on a bus is a little different!

Yes, AbbeyA, I suppose you would think that.

The thing that always puzzles me about this
boring old chestnut popular mumsnet topic is why parents feel their rights are being invaded if they cannot decide that the children should be allowed to eat a certain type of snack on school premises, yet you never see any threads complaining about not being allowed to decide what the children are to wear on school premises or what sports they are going to do or whether they are going outside for playtime or not.

Hey! I want my ds to go to school in a sailor suit. As a parent, surely it is my prerogative to decide that this is the costume that best expresses his personality; I don't want any educational busybodies interfering. I'm going to take up my stand outside the school gates and keep passing his sailor suit over until he jolly well changes into it!

The school expects me to pay for the clothes he wear- but I want to pay for a sailor suit, not some horrible old uniform. Surely they have no right to make me pay for a garment I don't want him to wear?

I also want him to read Cinderella but not Jack in the Beanstalk and play rounders but not football. Hey, I'm his paaaaaaaaaarent!

OMG am new to thread, but did someone actually compare choice of school snacks with segregation. How very, erm... brave.

Cory, I do apologise for discussing a topic that's ever been talked about before on Mumsnet.

I've never suggested - and I don't think the OP did either - that the parent should have the right to determine every factor about how their child spends his or her day in school. I happen to think that there is nothing wrong with a parent choosing to supply their child with a snack that is not fruit. Some of the stories that have been related on this thread about kids being humiliated and their parent implicity or explicitly criticised in front of classmates shock me.

If I have seemed vehement, it is only out of irritation at my argument being persistently (perhaps deliberately) misrepresented. I've been repeatedly accused of being motivated by wanting to feed my dd nothing but crap - which strikes me as a fairly idiotic way to try to win the argument.

wahwah, read the whole thread first?

If I was Jamie Oliver or anyone trying to improve the general nutrition of all children I think I would sit down and weep!What is the point?

Have you heard, as I have, AbbeyA, that Jamie Oliver's efforts have been credited, in some parts of the country, with causing a fall in the takeup of school meals?

I am going, never to return. We are destined nevber to understand each other.

SGM, we are not talking about segregation. I was not talking about segregation. Get a grip.

I still think that it's a sign of being unable to win the argument when you resort to misrepresenting the opposing case.

I really don't know why he bothers MsHighwater!
Of course it takes time to correct very poor diets and educate palates. I expect school meals would have a huge takeup if McDonalds came in and did them every day-it doesn't mean that we should serve chips with everything! It is actually making real progress in primary schools but is taking longer in secondary schools.It will get better as the primary school pupils get to secondary age.
Perhaps you will be happy if schools put the vending machines with coke back into the corridor. When your DD's school serves up a healthy meal you can pass a beef burger over the fence!

abbaey, are you really incapable of seeing another point of view, purely on the issue of fruit as a snack?

We are not talking about school dinners.
We are not talking about vending machines.
We are not talking about segregation.

SGM, all I am suggesting - all I have been suggesting all along - is that if I, as her mother - were to choose, occasionally to give my dd something other than fruit for a snack at school, she should be allowed to eat it without interference.

It should not be beyond the wit of our schools to promote healthy eating without undermining the role of parents to make choices for their children. I believe that the choice of snack, when provided by the parent, should be for the parent to make.

We are talking about a child having a piece of fruit 5 times a week at half past ten!! Why is it a problem merely because you didn't choose it-the child is at school, the school chose it in exactly the same way that they choose the reading scheme, whether to stream for maths,whether to have a uniform etc.

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