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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to expect peopel NOT to take preschoolers to secondary open days

153 replies

FluffyMummy123 · 22/09/2008 17:13

Message withdrawn

OP posts:
littlelapin · 22/09/2008 17:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

PussinWellies · 22/09/2008 17:35

Better, in my experience, than taking your ASD child, who will declare loudly:
'That man is really boring'
'But he IS mummy, I'm only saying it because he IS, why shouldn't we tell him then he might make it more interesting next year'
'Why do I have to shush? Aaaarrrgh, this is boring AND I can't even talk'
'Why do I have to come to this school if it's going to be boring?'

mumblechum · 22/09/2008 17:37

Why not one parent go to the open evening & one stay at home looking after the little ones?

Shows remarkably poor time management, imo, to have 11 year olds and 4 year olds in the same family.

Rilly.

dustystar · 22/09/2008 17:37

lol puss DS would probably have said something very similar.

mumblechum · 22/09/2008 17:38

at Puss in Wellies ds.

LittleBella · 22/09/2008 17:44

Yes you know YABU.

The alternative for many is either not to go, or to leave the pre-schoolers outside to play with the cars or at home to play with the electric.

And I think there would be more complaints about either of those options.

Ripeberry · 22/09/2008 17:54

Not everyone has a relative that can help.
Went to a party at a big softplay place and the host knew that i had DD1 and DD2 but i still had to PAY for DD2 to come along.
I just did not have anyone to help out that day and DH was working.
It really pissed me off as i'm a SAHM and she is also but drives to school in a Porshe. She could afford to pay for an xtra kid.

Heifer · 22/09/2008 17:56

Did you do the Cod stare? and point to her children then the door?

Not like you to hold back or did you take too long to plan what you were going to say then what you were going to type on MN befor e it all finished!?

ScummyMummy · 22/09/2008 17:58

My god, are yours coming up for secondary age already cods? I thought they were younger for some reason.

littlelapin · 22/09/2008 17:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

FranSanDisco · 22/09/2008 17:59

Ripeberry, you can't expect people to pay for your uninvited child just because she drives a fancy car. You had a choice - not to attend the party.

traceybath · 22/09/2008 18:01

Cod - yanbu - if child had to come should have gone out when started talking

Ripeberry - yabu - honestly why should she pay for your DD2? Quite perplexed by that really.

ahundredbiros · 22/09/2008 18:02

You should have done the whispering

Also - did you like school?

Ripeberry · 22/09/2008 18:02

Well, even though i don't have much, i would NEVER dream of making a guest pay. Maybe that's why i'm skint and she's loaded

littlelapin · 22/09/2008 18:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ripeberry · 22/09/2008 18:04

She knows i have DD2, she knows DH works at weekends and i don't have any help. At no point did she say that i had to pay.
She just sprung it on me when we were waiting to go in.
Lucky i had some money on me or there would have been tears.
It's just the principle!

ForeverOptimistic · 22/09/2008 18:04

YANBU. Earlier this year there were some meetings regarding the lack of school places in our town, the meetings took place in the evening and people turned up with toddlers in tow, no excuse for it as the guilty culprits had both parents there so it would have been easy for one of them to stay home and babysit.

Marina · 22/09/2008 18:05

But your dd2 wasn't a guest. The invitation was for dd1. If you resent her car ownership that much perhaps she has picked up on this and stood her ground over making you pay up
I can think of parents to whom I'd say, bring the little one with you, no worries, and others whom I would expect to cough up. It all depends on their attitude in general really.

traceybath · 22/09/2008 18:05

Standard party etiquette i'm afraid Ripeberry.

traceybath · 22/09/2008 18:07

It also depends how many of your guests have siblings - child could end up with only 6 friends at their party and all their brothers and sisters which really isn't on.

ahundredbiros · 22/09/2008 18:07

I find younger ones who tag along to birthday parties a real drag tbh. I never used to take my younger ones to the parties.

ahundredbiros · 22/09/2008 18:08

I mean I didn't take them and expect them to be able to join in and eat the food etc. I suppose I left the oldest one at the party.

Marina · 22/09/2008 18:08

and yabu cod in that some people have no choice but to bring smaller children to these things - but yanbu to say they should take them outside if they are too noisy
We had a nipper making a noise like a malfunctioning smoke alarm all the way through our Yr5 meeting and I do think I'd have taken mine outside if it was that shouty

littlelapin · 22/09/2008 18:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Ripeberry · 22/09/2008 18:09

Grrr i hate parties anyway! Maybe i should joing the parents who don't send their kids to parties and don't do parties. They seem much happier .
Why can't it be simple? Just some Jelly and ice cream and run around the garden? After the age of 4yrs, parties become a minefield

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