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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think that Trick or Treating is wrong - full stop

121 replies

curlyaqa · 18/09/2008 22:23

I intensely dislike the new(ish) custom, it is American is it not?
I wouldn't let my dc do it and I confess I ignore the doorbell on the night ().
It wouldn't be so bad if they just wanted sweets, but it's also money they're after, I believe.
Isn't it essentially begging too? It frightens some of the old folks and where I live they can get free signs to place on their doors to say they are not partcipating (or something along similar lines).
So aibu do you think?

OP posts:

thequietone · 19/09/2008 12:48

I got pelted with eggs on my way home from work, one Halloween. It really hurt as it was close range, and I cried the rest of the way.

I hate it.

wannaBe · 19/09/2008 12:54

it may not be originally american, but the americans have made it better than here.

In the US it's more about the dressing up for the little ones and then all going around in their costumes so everyone can see them, and then they get sweets. But they're little ones.

Over here it's not about the dressing up, but about the sweets/money they'll be getting, and the damage they can do if they don't. And most of them are not little - last year I opened the door to a group of lads, the youngest of whom was 12, so I sent them away with nothing. And friends of parents' car had break fluid poured over it because they didn't open the door. That does not, IMO, constitute a bit of fun.

But last year I was told that refusing to allow my ds out trick or treating was tantamount to child abuce.

Idobelieveinfairies · 19/09/2008 13:03

That sounds brill omirian...I want to live where you are!...lol

wessexgirl · 19/09/2008 13:05

I don't mind supervised little ones knocking on my door early in the evening.

I do mind older kids armed with eggs later on.

nervousal · 19/09/2008 13:09

last year it consisted of a group of teenagers hanging about on the corner - whilst they took it in turns to wear their shared mask and come and demand stuff.

charlotte121 · 19/09/2008 13:10

Im not going to let my kids trick or treat. Its blackmail.... give me some sweets or I'll egg your house. Doesnt send out a very good message IMO. But the little ones do look cute in their outfits. I wasnt alowed to do it as a child becuase my mum is religious, but I just dont agree with it moraly... I think i will just let the kids have a little party instead.

LazyLinePainterJane · 19/09/2008 13:12

The whole hiding from the doorbell thing wouldn't be so ridiculous is people didn't put more effort into making it look like they were out, avoiding the doorbell and not letting anyone see you are there and then moaning about the whole shenanigans than they would if they just bought some fracking sweets!

My mum is the same every year "it's begging, moan moan"...Not when people enjoy giving the sweets surely? What is gained from complaining about it? The only one not having any fun is YOU!

StewiesMom · 19/09/2008 13:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CapnGooberSparrow · 19/09/2008 13:38

Tis just kids having a bit of fun.
I happen to think it is quite good for the community spirit, as neighbours who never spoke now do since knocking on their door with my DS and I also arm DH with a mahoosive bowl of sweets, We don't hide.

CapnGooberSparrow · 19/09/2008 13:40

But have just read the thread properly.
Don't agree with the egging aspect, was merely agreeing with little'ns dressing up and knocking with a parent.

cali · 19/09/2008 13:48

YABU

Trick or Treat isn't really a new custom, I can remember going out Guysing when I was a child, so probably about 25+ years ago.

We used to make a Guy, acquire a pram and push the Guy around the streets. This would start on Halloween and end up with the guy being burned on a bonfire.

I would far rather have my dd's go out trick or treating than burn something that (vaguely) resembles a person.

The American's probably adapted Guysing into trick or treat as I'm sure that Guy Fawkes wouldn't mean much to American children, or children in the UK today.

Lusi · 19/09/2008 16:18

'penny for the Guy'...fondly remember from being a child ...
Children going around the streets (not knocking on doors!) with a stuffed 'guy' that must have taken some time to make, collecting money for bonfire night...

never allowed to do it myself...

Now my parent's in England get groups of teenagers trick or treating (demanding money with the one plastic mask!) and a day or so later they knock on the door again with a pathetic Guy -a few old clothes with the same plastic mask - demanding more money...saying one pound for the guy...

Probably use the money to buy fireworks to torture animals etc - or fags - or booze...

They get the same teenagers nearer christmas as carol singers ...nothing angelic about them...

purpleduck · 19/09/2008 16:49

Wow its rough where you lot live

OrmIrian · 19/09/2008 16:52

Blimey! Isn't it just purpleduck

I thought this place was rough!

girlywhirly · 19/09/2008 16:59

In the past, I've had eggs thrown over my house, and silly string and flour over my car. And that was not because I wouldn't open the door or give anything, just because it was late at night and they were bored! Forgive me if I dislike Hallowe'en.

Thequietone, you must have been terrified.

If I could guarantee the only children to call would be those I know from my close then maybe...... but overall, I think parties are the best way to celebrate, I have no problem with the celebrating of Hallowe'en itself. Children should respect that others may not choose to participate in certain customs, after all, at Christmas, it doesn't entitle people to knock on your door demanding mince pies 'because it's Christmas'

laraeo · 19/09/2008 17:50

Wow! Trick or treating is definitely diffenent here (another Yank talking). The last neighborhood we were in was considered a "good" one and people would truck in their kids - literally - because they knew it was safe and the area was fairly rural and we were one of the few "developed" places. We had little kids and teenagers - many of whom I knew since I taught at the local high school. Never had any problems. Rule of thumb - light on = candy. We'd go through 12 bags in just a couple of hours. When we were out, the light went off. I even had a little hat I made the poor dog wear as his costume. Pity the dog. There was no trick or treating in Australia last year and something tells me this year will not be what I'm used to either. I haven't seen any halloween stuff in the shops yet but it looks like we're supposed to be prepping for Christmas in September!

Blandmum · 19/09/2008 17:57

my Father used to go out on halloween when he was a child in south wales in 1920s and 1930.

It is deffo not just an american import!

Where I live, people only knock on door of houses that are lit up

antisocial behavior is shite, regardless of the cause. Different thing IMHO

GetOrfMoiLand · 19/09/2008 18:11

Well, I like it. It has always been fun, and getting a bit wistful taht DD is getting a bit old now so not too many years left when I can accompany her on trick or treats.

Luckily have never experienced any horrible behaviour.

Anyway, what is wrong with American customs anyway?

pushchair · 19/09/2008 18:14

Miss guising with the turnip lantern and doing your 'piece' a song trick or joke. First halloween in England local children were stumped by my request for a turn from them in return for sweets.

fizzbuzz · 19/09/2008 19:53

When my mum was still alive, elderly and living on her own she dreaded it. And she lived in a nice neighbourhood...

I like the little kid part, but think it is abused by teenagers, and am not impressed by eggs/flour or anything else.

Lusi · 19/09/2008 23:34

Just noticed 'parent's' - sorry to all the grammar pedants out there...

Slightly off topic but...
My parents live in what used to be a nice village...but the population has more than quadrupled in the last 20 years...lots of new houses being built on every spare scrap of land...and any sense of community spirit has disappeared completely...

In the village where I live now there are plans to double the population over the next 10 years...

Probably my parents get more hassle because they live in one of the original houses - the youngsters think that the people living there (mainly older) will either be easier to intimidate or are more wealthy ...

ra29 · 20/09/2008 00:09

Why can't teenagers have fun too and enjoy being kids? There's nothing wrong imo with teenagers dressing up and trick or treating - it's our adult projection that they're horrible and scary that stops them being able to do more innocent things and halloween can be innocent fun.
Grrr - this annoys me every year!

muggglewump · 20/09/2008 00:15

Surely this has got nothing to do with Halloween/Trick or Treating, and a lot to do with awful kids?
I've said earlier in the thread that where I live all the kids are out with parents and we all decorate our houses. It's not begging, it's fun and it's more like a mass exchange of goodies, than anything else.
I made 30 bags last year and ran out, I'm making 50 this year!

The teens with eggs and intimidation is wrong, but it has nothing to do with kids and parents enjoying themselves on Halloween when the whole neighbourhood joins in.

thumbwitch · 20/09/2008 00:34

ra29 - IF the teens were just out having fun then no one would care less. Some of them probably are but if you read the posts properly you will see that several people have had problems with teens who are in it for the money/what they can get and will take retribution if they get nothing.

mrswoolf · 20/09/2008 01:29

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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