to want to call children's services?

[Orangutan]

Our neighbour upstairs lives alone, but every now and then a woman & a little girl would come for the weekend. Now, it?s been about a month since the woman & the daughter have been staying there with a new born baby! DH asked neighbour if he?d started a family & he said no they?re just staying there temporarily. Now, DH & I get woken up through the night with the baby crying for a long time (which is fine that?s what new borns do) BUT the woman SCREAMS for it to shut up & shut the fcuk up! It happened once & I thought, ok, hormones, but when DH was off-sick he said it happened during the day as well, and early this morning she did it again, quite a few times & I heard things being chucked around. I was really distressed & am now thinking of phoning Child Services. Also, the little girl, is defo about 6 or 7 years old & she should be in school & she?s not. What would you do?

phone NSPCC and social services

I would contact social services or someone. Have seen other threads on MN which deal with this type of problem and give good advice.

Phone SS , if something happened and it all got too much you couldn't live with the fact knowing that you should have done something.

Not saying that she would go beyond 'shut the fuck up' but she dosen't sound like she's handling things well.

I'm sorry but I shouted at my newborn baby to shut up seveal times. Also remember screaming shut the fuck up at the builders next door / person beeping their horn in the street / sny random thing that I thought was stopping newborn baby from sleeping in the day. DS and I are both fine now.

Having said all that...better to phone NSPCC I reckon. It's better to do something and be wrong (NSPCC less scary than children's services) than to stand by and do nothing and there is a problem. It may be that Mum needs some help - it must be a nightmare living in temporary accommodation with a newborn.

You either need to go up and ask if everything is OK or call Social Services.

PHONE THEM

You need to go and offer help in a none judgemental way and then phone someone for advice.

phone them, mum sounds like she might need some support

Why not go and introduce yourself in a neighbourly way, could just be some one having a really really hard time. There are support networks available to they may not have realised, think its called home start amongst others. Also is the daughter definitely four, I have a 4 yr old who looks about 6 so it is possible to get it very wrong, she may also be in alternative education. Would get more info before taking further action.

I really, really think you should go upstairs and say hello to her.

The poor woman is living temporarily with a baby, and a daughter she may or may not have been able to get into a local school (maybe she had hoped to be back home by now; we don't know).

Everyone has been quick to say phone NSPCC,a dn yes it does sound like this poor woman could do with some help, but how about some nieghbourly help?

I would much rather my neighbour invited me in for a coffee and a chat, and gave me a shoulder to cry on than sent SS around.

I never screamed at my babies, but I'm pretty sure I would have screamed at DS1, if I hadn't had DH there to help us.

Yeah ring SS just in case

Thing is getting Social services involved is pretty major, not just a thing to do with vague grounds. Think an initial assessment just saying Hi and getting a better grip on the situation is more appropriate, might clear up all your worries in a few seconds or give you real grounds to phone SS. Unless you really don't want to.

Not being in school isn't a reason to call SS in itself...home education being legal an' all.....but I would be concerned about the shouting at the baby if it's more than an occasional thing. Maybe worth a call to the local HV to see if the woman is on their books...or social services to see if they are aware of the family. It's possible she may be suffering from PND and just needs some support/help. If you want to get involved then an offer to baby-sit etc while she gets some rest/time to herself might be worth a try.

after reading so many sad stories in the news lately where children have died/suffered when they could have been helped i always say if you are at worried phone ss.

taking children away from the mother is the last option. the mum will be offered the right help first