to be annoyed at my friend saying im no good with kids

[NattyThomasAndEllen]

my friend just told me that i am no good with kids,
she says i dont talk to her kids properly, like little people. i talk to them like babies.
but im sorry, i have 2 children that dont speak. speaking to kids all day about school and television programmes, i am not used to, because DS is so delayed$ (he is autistic) i just dont have any experiance of it.
she says she is suprised that i want to work with disabled children, and that i want lots of kids of my own. she said i dont seem like i can get on with kids.
AIBU to be throughly pissed off at this?

Sympathy AccipeHoc- it used to drive me up the wall.

Some of it I only realised after I'd had ds2 and ds3. I used to get blamed for babying him, but having had the other 2 and seen the stuff they just 'do' I realised that I was responding to ds1, not making him that way!

To encourage language, one of the vital things to do, is 'follow your child's lead', so there's no point getting out a 40 page book if he wants to stare at the pattern on the Wallpaper!

YANBU

your friend clearly has no understanding of SN. and if she was a real friend , she would either keep her ignorant comments to herself, or learn a bit more about autism, so she could support rather than blame you

your friend sounds like she has a very limited view of the world, if she cannot understand why you want to work with children with SN, she clearly has no imagination if she can only imagine being with NT children as rewarding or enjoyable

you sound like a far more rounded, mature, intelligent and compassionate woman than she is.

Having a son with moderate language delay, many sympathies. Your friend is 1)completely wrong (which is not unusual) but 2)a complete cow (which is rather less usual, and that sort of negativitity you don't need in your life).

"baby talk" is very helpful for language development, and absolutely essential for kids with any sort of delay.

because she is more qualified to be around children than you simplly because hers speak?

tell her to fuckoff go away.

you dont need friends like that.

If it helps, when dealing with children with a disability you speak to them however they can understand..be it BSL/makaton or baby babble.

I hate friends, or supposed ones, who keep offering their unsolicited opinion and make endless comments, in the end I just get rid of them and end up feeling v relieved!

Don't put up with rubbish IMO.

oh my your friend doesnt sound very nice. i thought friends were meant to be supportive no?

fwiw i think that children are so different when it comes to development it is hard to know what they will understand. dd1 is vry advanced with her language and gets annoyed when people presume that she wont understand something and explains it in a childish way to her. my niece otoh who is only a few months younger would struggle to understand some of th words and concepts that dd1 can.

i do both adult and baby talk to my kids even dd2 who cannlt talk yet as im sure that you are meant to. hearing adults talk in a normal manner is the best way for children to learn.

aw thank you all, i am def keeping my distance from her now, ignored three phone calls last night!
i still feel hurt, because although i may not be a terribly natural mum, i do put 100% of love and care in everything i do, and i think that is just as important.
she really is a silly mare lol! was begining to think i was just being sensitive. (which to be fair where thomas is concerned i am, the autism is still new to me, and i dont like him being singled out because of it)