To nwant another baby even if its sooooooo unpractical and it means me having a 4th c-section

[shinyshoes]

I have had 3 c-sections
DS1 1997 Elective (small hips)
DS2 2000 Elective (same reason)
DD1 2008 emergency c-section after going through 2 days of labour and being able to 'pass' her,

my smallest baby was 8.6 1/2. my biggest was 10.1 lb
I'm thinking of just one more, i'm approaching mid 30's and want a huuuge brood yet due to the amount of sections i've had and me not being able to do it naturally I have to have a 4th section there is no way on on this earth I would be allowed a natural birth. DD1 gave me a uterine rupture (tore me inside, tore my old scars open).

Shall I, or am I just being ridiculous?

i'm very scared, don't flame me,

X

i think because i too have had 3 c sections its almost as if we crave another bby simply because we know that more thn 3 c sections isnt reccomended- i feel insanely jealous when people have huge families knowing full well that had i delivered naturally we too would have had more children.

its not really a good idea to go for a 4th the risks are high it takes longer to recover etc etc - i would dearly love another baby but i dont think its fesible or fair to my family to take such a huge risk.

there will be people who say ohhh mandy down the road ha 6 sections then delivered triplets all by herself but thats a fluke more than likely id be the one needing an emergency hysterectomy or something equally dramtic.

sometimes you just hve to count the blessings you already have - bloody hard tho isnt it?

Honestly I think you should leave it, what if something awful happened and your 3 children grow up without a mother.

can you not discuss this with GP and if necessary a gynaecologist as to how risky another pg/section would be? Or have you already been advised against?

Agree you need to discuss with your GP and maybe get a second opinion too. Though on the face of it, I tend to agree with other posts - it sounds terribly risky.
Looking at the birth dates of your 3, the baby must be very new (born 2008)? And the older two are 11 years and 8 years? That's a big gap - I just wonder whether you're feeling those newborn weeks slipping away and feeling this might be the last time..? That's a perfectly natural feeling; I think you need to try to distinguish between wanting another CHILD and wanting another baby? I know many women who agonise over this (even without your difficult medical history) so its not terribly unusual.

I think you should discuss it with your consultant. I do know of a couple of women who have had four c-sections. Also it is very soon after the birth of your third child.

Funnily enough I was talking to someone yesterday about this.

I would have liked a 3rd baby (tbh I am not sure if it is because I am now 43 and time is slipping away that I have these thoughts) but I had to have 2 sections because both mine were spine to spine and ds1 was 9lb 4oz, ds2 9lb 5.5oz and I am only small.

I am sure because of the above they would give me a section and I don't think I could face surgery again.

I'm planning on TTC in the next 6 months.
My fourth child.
I have had 3 CSections and my Cons is perfectly fine with me having a 4th child. (Or at least she was when I was pg with my third, haven't seen her since.)
3 CSs doesn't necessarily mean no more babies. I'd check with your cons.

my consultant told us on our 3rd baby that ,if i were his wife 2 c sections is enough for a womans body-as it turned out i really was v poorly afterwards thanks to them leaving bits of placenta behind........

Wow you lot are harbingers of doom

I have a good friend who has had 4 sections, no probs

I can point you to examples of multip sections, have you researched it at all? I think that you will find that you won't be alone in having 4 sections.

Perhaps what you really want to be thinking about is, how much do you really want another child!

I think 4 c sections is quite common nowadays tbh.

I have had 3 sections, and wouldn't hesitate to have a 4th, but only because I have never had any problems with any of my sections at all.

However, if I had had a rupture as you did with your 3rd, then I am sorry to say that I wouldn't go in for a fourth.

I know I should really count my blessings with the children I have got, I know I am lucky and there are some women that can't have children so I feel incredibly priveledged.

I havent done a huge amount of reasearch into 4 sections. I have done a huge amount of research on VBac's and thought I'd be ok after having a big gap between DS2 (8 years old) and having my DD1 . I thought I had healed up nicely but the rupture goes to prove that even after all that time things can still go wrong, and I always thought 'it wouldnt happen to me'
To be honest I don't think I have ogt over the trauma of having DD1 in January of this year. I tried a Vbac and it was unsuccessful and I don't think i've stopped blaming myself for not being able to do it 'properly' I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes thinking about it LOL.
It sounds ridiculous but I missed her first cries and the joy of seeing her when she first came out becuase of me having to be knocked out for the emergency c-section.
Perhaps in some silly way I want another baby so I have another chance of getting that back. IYSWIM.
I would like another one but can my body cope? My eldest is 11 and at some point i've got to let them grow instead of replacing the children with babies. But at the same time i'm still young (33) we are not well off, but it wouldnt be a huge struggle finacially, I work part-time and Partner works full-time.
BUT we are in a 2 bedroomed house and it would end up being like the Waltons in here, we are not moving house in the forseeable future, but didnt the older generation house 5 children in one room? I know my nan did.
I don't know at some point I have to stop having children, perhaps because of my age and the age of my children I think I could fit in just one more, but it's always 'just one more' isn't it.?
I ahve been told to leave it a year before i get pregnant again, not that I think it makes a difference, as I ruptured after leaving it for 8 years so time isn't necessarily a healer given my experience (referring to the rupture). I was told by the surgeon I was close to a hysterectomy, so tore me so bad inside. I'd lost preety much everything that was holding me all together and I had a covering as thin as clingfilm left. (This is what she said) so can I risk it again, but at the same time like IllegallyBrunette says 4 sections is common nowadays.

I would like another but I don't cfrave another, I did everytime I had my others, I felt in my heart and mind I was ready and to me nothing else mattered but at the moment i've not got that craving, I think too much is at stake medically.

I think I need to discuss this with a consultant if she says no way then thats it but if theres a glimmer of hope I need to consider this as a possibility. I think I wanted you lovely Mumsnetters to make my mind up for me.

Partner isn't baothered, he's fine with me having another, he's a great dad to all of our children and would like a big family.

Thank you for the replies and for the good advice and you have given me some food for thought.

shiny, I have had 4 CS's and my 4th went a lot better than my third!

A rupture is only likely if you labour again and I don't think anyone would be advising you to do that! I had a rupture on my second.

My consultant is very highly regarded in his field. In the hospital I attend, the "problem" patients, i.e woman who insist on having 10 CS's are all referred to him. When I asked him about a 5th CS, he said that he had no problem with that, that yes there were slightly increased risks but that he did not regard it as a reason not to go ahead with another pg. Two junior doctors at the hospital were that I has having a fourth, though!

shiny I am with chipmonkey that the rupture is only a risk if you labour again - not if you get pg again. I agree too with posters who say to see a consultant to get proper facts on the actual risks to you, with your history, of having 4 sections. Get a second or even a third opinion of that helps. Then you can make a proper informed decision knowing the risks you are taking.

FWIW I had an elective section with ds2 after an emergency one with ds1. The birth of ds2 was amazing - I asked them to lower the screen so that I could see him being born (didn't see any gory stuff ) and he was then passed straight to me (via a midwife to keep it all sterile). We had immediate skin to skin and it was very moving. So it is possible to have a section and have all this too. For sure it will be medicalised but I think there are things you can do to make it more personal and more of a birth than simply an operation.

I've had 4 sections too - the last 2, which were pre-planned, were done at 38 weeks & 37 weeks to minimise the risk of a rupture.

The fact that your old scar tissue did rupture in labour with your last baby probably puts you at increased risk of it happening with a 4th pg (I think they will have had to remove some of the old uterine tissue in order to make a nice neat join so there will be less elasticity now???) so be prepared for a very early delivery!

Good luck anyway, ss

btw, I had a rupture on my second CS because I was given Pitocin. That is not supposed to happen on a VBAC. Don't know if I would have ruptured if left to my own devices.

WW, my last was done at 39 weeks. But if anyone had offered to do it at 37 weeks I probably would have jumped at the chance, so elephantine was I at time! My abiding memory of that pg if of feeling huge and my trousers never staying up!

Take medical advice. Head should rule heart on this one.

I have had 2 sections, one very complicated by massive internal bleeding after the op which required further surgery. I had a surprise pg last year which was to be my 5th child. Sadly I lost her at 20 wks (this was my second such late loss) and since then was desperate to try again although I am very high risk. It may seem selfish from the outside for me to try again/want another but unless someone has walked in my shoes and had a stillbirth and experienced the horrible emptiness-I wouldnt' listen to them. The doctors never told me not to have more and don't seem bothered about a 3rd section even after the 'near miss' situation last time. I know a few people who have had 4 sections with no issues. I would go with your heart but also take on board the risks, eg are the risks small or significant etc.

I have chatted with a lady on another forum who has had 7 CS's. She did have placenta accreta on her 7th CS, which is very serious.
There is a woman in Ireland who has had 13.

Hiya. Not got anything to add apart from you can rupture from a csection too, not just from labouring naturally or chemically. Although its very rare it doesn happen.

Good luck making your decision and I'm very sorry you are traumatised by your last birth, have you spoken to anyone professionally about it? I had ptsd from my 1st birth and counselling massively helped me and I'm about to try hypnotherapy too.

Ive had 5 c sections although last one was very unplanned and she did not survive due to going into labour too early... My 4th was my easiest and i felt so well after...however the 5th baby that i lost was a nightmare...lost so much blood that i ended up in the high dependancy ward...she passed away at a half an hour old...i personally wanted 4 so i did but after the trauma of the unplanned 5th pg maybe i should have thought twice... Good luck sweetie sorry if my post is a little morbid xx

Oops bit of an old thread sorry :) did u go for ur fourth i wonder x

I have a friend who has had 5 c sections. Speak to your doctor about it.