to think that 11 is too young to be left to go bowling and to Pizza Hut without adult supervision.

[nelliesmum]

Dropped my 11 year-old niece off at an 11th Birthday Party Bash on Saturday and was surprised to find that there were four girls, the eldest was 12, doing bowling and then Pizza Hut with no supervision at all. Does this strike anyone else as odd? It turns out that the waiting staff in Pizza Hut were fairly horrible to them.

my ds is 10.5 and is desperate to go to pizza hut - or any 'restaurant' with his friends alone. I am considering it for his 11th birthday. There will be 4 of them (I think a large group would diintergate into stupidness)

But I'm sure they will be fine. He has been bowling by himself (though I dropped them off and picked them up)He has been to cinema by himself too.

And he and another 10 year old 'survived' a whole day at a music festival without parental control and very little money (they did a runner, basically) and had a whale of a time

If they are spending money and not arseing around, why shouldn't they. I am very sorry for the girls if the staff were horrid to them - they have as much right to spend their money as an older person.

As I said I have not reached that milestone and my boys are not yet at senior school so will have to take a big breath and be brave!I was going to the next town by train to school at 11 but that was 1968 and were things different then I don't know.

As I said I have not reached that milestone and my boys are not yet at senior school so will have to take a big breath and be brave!I was going to the next town by train to school at 11 but that was 1968 and were things different then I don't know.

will retract my previous post

dd !6yrs has reminded me she was doing this at 11

memory is shoite

at 11, I was driven into town, left to go shopping and picked up again at the end of the day. At my last school, many 12 year old girls would have to catch the train to the town, and then undertake a 10 -15 min walk to the school all by themselves... so I really do not see a problem with bowling and pizza, assuming they're on the same site and they're being dropped off and picked up again.

When I was a child, most of us was allowed into town from about 11/12 (first year secondary), although I do remember one friend who wasn't... so she lied and did it all behind her mother's back anyway!

I think 11/12 is about right to start giving that little bit of independence, particularly when they start going up to secondary school.

(Sorry, last school I taught at!)

I woudn't have let dd at 11, would be too difficult where i am anyway.

I agree with batters - I don't think ds would be able to cope with all of this (especially the bowling as I suspect Maureen and I are thinking of the same Alley of Doom) at a year six party - he is young in his year for starters.
I think it is very important to build independence in the year or so running up to secondary transfer, but bowling does not sound a good idea to me. Restaurant, OK, but with the proviso that it was all carefully planned by parents and restaurant briefed etc
If I was the birthday girl's mum I'd be wanting to get to the bottom of why the staff were pissed off

Depends on the location and the child(ren) involved.

DS1 yes, wouldn't have had a problem with this, although I can't remember him doing so at that age.

DS2 erm, not til he's 30 at this rate!

DS3, this time next year, maybe.

And I too would want to know what the problem was at the pizza hut.

Dd1 was going into town for shopping ect... at 11 but only the small local town. At about 12 she started going into the larger town the other direction and now at 13 (youngest in year though so friends are nearly 14) she is mature enough and sensible enough to do what she wants (within reason )

It sounds fine to me, I was allowed to go into town on the bus at that age and do whatever, swimming, ice rink, general larking around and by 12 I was allowed to go to Newcastle or Metro Cente (I'm from Durham).
I'm hoping to be back in the area when DD starts secondary and she'll be allowed to do the same so long as she is responsible. I hope she'll be allowed the same freedom as her friends although she'll be the youngest in the year if we're back in England.

She's just started walking to school with her friend and she just turned 7 this week.
I'm happy with it as is the other Mum. They've been allowed to the shop and park all summer which is halfway to school a two minute walk away across one road.
All the kids in the street have been and they range in age from 5-10

Pizza Hut and bowling at 11 doesn't sound unusual to me.

I was doing this at 11. It was the 'norm' back then.

I think about 11 is the right age actually.

back then it was the norm Foreveroptimistic, but sadly things are different now in some areas

At 11, there is no way i would allow dd by herself at the nearest bowling centre to us,which is in Brighton.

Well around here it is very common.

i didn't say it wasn't common, just that i wouldn't allow her in brighton alone at 11.

Personally would not have been happy to find their was no adult supervision. My older ones haven't gone into town alone/with friends until Y8, very few (if any) of their friends were going in any earlier. School is different issue imo/e, either parents take them or mostly get dedicated school buses.

same here loshad.

apologies there