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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be sat here, not speaking to DH on our 5th Wedding Anniversary.....

18 replies

makeminealargeoneplease · 23/08/2008 21:07

We went out for meal tonight, with the kids it was really nice. I offered to drive home so he could have a drink. Its the first time I've been able to do so as I've only just passed my test 4 months ago....yep we don't go out that often!! (We are going to see Stevie Wonder at the O2 in a few weeks so thats the main treat BTW, this was an 'extra'). However my DH is a TERRIBLE passenger always has been, as soon as we got in the car he was given me instructions on how to drive like I was a learner or something, in a really patronising way. "Get in this lane, drop it into 1st, mind out for that car" etc etc. Even my DD aged 3 said "daddy stop being so bossy to mummy" which he hated. I drive everyday and haven't so much as scratched the car, I'm a good driver, but he says I should accept advice from someone who has been driving for 15years (ie him) so blardy annoying!! I'm not driving us back from a night out again, thats final. Now he's done the usual....."do you want to forget about the fight and not ruin the rest of the night or shall we sit in silence"....end of, he's not listening to me say anymore on the subject, apparently I'm blowing it up out of proportion and it was just a couple of harmless comments/advice!!! I'm seething.....should I be?

OP posts:
Waswondering · 23/08/2008 21:09

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Lazarou · 23/08/2008 21:11

Happy anniversary!

msdemeanor · 23/08/2008 21:11

Ah, I know it's bloody annoying, but it's not worth ruining an evening over. In future, make him drive or get a cab. Poke him hard in the ribs and say, 'Oi you, make me a coffee and I'll think about it'. Make it up. You lurve him really!
(men are really funny about cars IME - I use it as an excuse to drink too much on nights out!)

Slubberdegullion · 23/08/2008 21:11

what Waswondering said.

He's been a bit of a twonk but go and give him a kiss anyway.

LackaDAISYcal · 23/08/2008 21:12

accept that he will always have control issues sitting in the passenger seat with you driving, kiss and make-up and enjoy the rest of your evening.

oh, and next time you are out, tell him he is sitting in the back with the DCs

wilkos · 23/08/2008 21:14

agree with waswondering. my dh is the same with the old ive been driving 150 years blah blah blah (I only passed two years ago)

just tune out when you are in the car with him, don't get drawn into any discussion of your driving style

that will really piss him off!
enjoy your night x

ShinyPinkShoes · 23/08/2008 21:15

Life's too short.

Sort it out and enjoy what's left of the evening.

Janni · 23/08/2008 21:16

My dad has lost most of his sight and STILL tries to boss my mum about when she's driving.

Happy Anniversary. Just tell him not to do it again and get on with having a nice evening.

makeminealargeoneplease · 23/08/2008 21:16

.....you are right! Thanks everyone. Better go and pour myself a drink (as my name states!) and go and put some posh underwear on!! See you in the morning!!

OP posts:
sunnytimer · 23/08/2008 21:17

Message withdrawn

Lilyloo · 23/08/2008 21:25

it's your anniversary forgive and forget

Thomcat · 23/08/2008 21:30

Oh back seat drivers are soooo annoying but I think you'll regret it if you don't kiss and make up on a night like tonight.

scottishmummy · 23/08/2008 21:36

ffs 5yrs ago saying your vows did you think you'd bicker and you would be telling a bunch of strangers?

of course not

log off

make up

don't stew over he said i said...blah blah

life is too short

happy anniversary

crokky · 23/08/2008 21:53

Make up with him. It's your anniversary and unusually, I agree with the man (sorry ).

I passed my driving test about the same time as your DH. My DH has only been driving a year though. He happily accepts my advice.

It's not only your skills that are important when driving - it's going to be someone else on the road causing the accident so you need to be aware of lots of things like this. There are so many different scenerios - I think you should take his advice and instructions given his experience - he will have encountered far more of these scenerios than you over time.

TheHedgeWitch · 24/08/2008 01:50

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

makeminealargeoneplease · 24/08/2008 08:20

Yep, made up good and proper!
He was a tad confused at my change in temperament after a spell on the laptop! "Why have you gone from being a psycho to being normal and nice? What have you been doing on the computer" he said as I cuddled up to him. "nothing" I said (what goes on on MN stays on MN!!). Thanks everyone! You were right! Life's too short!

OP posts:
sunnytimer · 24/08/2008 08:31

Message withdrawn

bonnibaby · 24/08/2008 10:34

Glad you made up in the end as its not worth ruining your aniversary but for what its worth i totally agree how annoying it is .
My husband and i came to the agreement very early on in our relationship that he always drives unless he is too drunk in which case he has to keep quiet or walk!-he would always critisize my driving and it makes me livid,i have been driving 18 years same as him.
Lovely chap but like a lot of men ,he thinks noone can drive as well as him!

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