to expect my dh to wait a while before wanting bumsex

[FanjolinaJolly]

I have recently given birth to twins.My dh is gorgeous in most respects but is pressurising me about having liasons sexual up the derriere.I am quiter frasnkly,m'dears too tired what with my hectic lifestyle and meedja attention-AIBU??

I'm not gonna google it so spill.

Tell him to hold fire, so to speak, and wait until Hello and OK have finished their bidding war for the photoshoot of aforementioned bumsex.

I assume the money will be going to an anus related charity?

He can to me up the wrong 'un (I'm a bit bunged up)

cornsilk - armpit sex.

From the urban dicitonary

1. Bagpiping

Armpit fucking "Joe bagpiped a french woman and had armpit hair stuck to his penis."

1. bagpiping

stimulation of the penis to climax by using the armpit of your lover. "Lets try bagpiping because you have the painters in."

1. bagpiping

"To put your partners penis under your arm and play it like a bagpipe"

Bumdiddley as you recommended bagpiping, I think we might assume you are quite the accomplished player.

oh that is soooooooo funny

Of course! I like to macrami at the same time.

PMSL at bagpiping. Is armpit farting the fanny fart equivalent?

But where do you blow?
Surely the bag part is obvious?

I think you just make arm movements like trying to armpit fart? No? Have I got that wrong?

I find sticking my tongue in dhs navel works in the abcense (sp) of a pipe.

I could never do armpit farts. Clearly my technique would be lacking.

I am making arm movements here like I am doing the birdie dance to see how it would work - I think we have it wrong. You would squash the nob would you not?

And what if you are ticklish?

sign for the bedroom door

If you are ticklish then everyone's a winner.

You can get your armpit hair caught too.

Oh and the chafing, God, the chafing.

is hter something in the water oday?
You lot are insane!

jus be carefull to shave close or he'll end up with a grated penis

Would also serve as armpit hair removal then? Kill two birds with one stone.

Hmmm. They're a bit short at the mo.

We'll do toe jobs 'til it's a bit longer.

Well you learn something new everyday