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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU in thinking my husband is an ungrateful git???

45 replies

shoptilidrop · 31/07/2008 10:46

Honestly i am mighty pi**ed off. Its his 30th birthday in a few weeks. He wants money to put towards a new bike. Thats fine and im organising it all. HE wont get if for a few weeks after his birthday as we are on holiday then he is away for a week. I wanted to do something special for him, so decided to do a scrapbook of the last 10 years. I got a really nice album, and all the bits i needed, and spent about £25. Ive spent the last 2 days looking for photos but am missing qiute a lot. DH works away in the week and has his own pc so i asked him to bring some back with him. He immediatley got defensive, saying why did i want them, why couldnt i tell him. i said i couldnt as it was a surprise. He got a bit narked about that and said he didnt want a bloody life book thing, or a poster of his life or anything with pics of him in. Bloody ungreatful sod. I told him thanks a lot i shall no longer make any poxy effort and he will be lucky to get a card!
Honestly, whats wrong with him!

OP posts:
Hecate · 31/07/2008 11:29

Then that is the perfect time to remind him of this.

In front of everyone.

[evil]

Original poster
shoptilidrop · 31/07/2008 11:32

no i did ask a few blokes at work.
If he didnt want it, he could have been more tactful, or have just pretended. he just phoned me and said he didnt mean to upset me, but still does not want the present.
And i know he likes photos, he keeps all his bloody army ones, has about 150 of them all over his walls at camp. Would have them here if i let him.

OP posts:
Hecate · 31/07/2008 11:36

So he just doesn't want reminding of the last 10 years then!

Has he let himself go?

Original poster
shoptilidrop · 31/07/2008 11:36

yes i will remind him.

Actually i asked mn a few weeks ago for an idea for something special as a little extra that wouldnt cost a lot. This was one of the ideas.......
Also lots of people said sex vouchers, ive done them for dh before too. he thinks they are crap and a waste of time.

I think i should buy him cheap pants and socks and then laugh at him.. or maybe a box of just for men! LOL that will serve him righ.

OP posts:
Hecate · 31/07/2008 11:39

I bought my dh pile cream and fixodent for his birthday.

Seriously.

Notanexcitingname · 31/07/2008 11:39

my Dh would like something like that; and if he didn't, he'd say so politely.

I think you're entitled to think him an ungrateful git, but ti would be a bit childish to cancel stuff. I don't think there's any harm in telling huim his response upset you though

Original poster
shoptilidrop · 31/07/2008 11:39

yes and has a massive bald patch. I may just get a pic of that when hes asleep and blow it up and make that into a birhtday card!

OP posts:
differentID · 31/07/2008 11:43

Why not just get a box and write a little note inside saying "As you are so bloody ungrateful and rude and said you didn't want anything special done, this box contains nothing but this note. If, on my birthday in a few weeks time, people do make an effort for ME, do not strop and sulk like a toddler as I will remind you loudly and in public of what you have done to me this week. Happy Birthday"

Original poster
shoptilidrop · 31/07/2008 11:46

oh i like that idea.

OP posts:
Capital · 31/07/2008 11:51

I once bought an ex a cappucino maker from Heals for his 30th and he laughed at me in front all our friends and reminded me that it was his 30th not 60th Ungrateful arse.

Men can be very thoughtless sometimes.

Anyway, what on earth is a sex voucher

Hecate · 31/07/2008 11:55

A voucher entitling the bearer to some sex.

er, With the issuer of the voucher that is. Not to just rip off a voucher and approach some random woman

here. caution, ADULT link

Capital · 31/07/2008 12:02

Oh I see. [ewww]

ConstanceWearing · 31/07/2008 12:04

No, yanbu. His response was brutally rude. No need for it. You can say "no, thank you" in other ways than that.

Original poster
shoptilidrop · 31/07/2008 12:06

capital, that was really mean of him, really thoughtless.

I dont know what they expect really i dont. My dh wont have clothes at all, hes really tall and hates it if he hasnt brought something without trying in on, as he will ALWAYS say it is too short, even when it isnt. Then he has been going on about how hw needs new clothes, but doesnt want to buy any and thinks hes too old to buy trendy studd. WTF? Hes a idiot. Then it was my brothers 21st, he had a driviing experience thing. Dh said how cool that was, so i asked if he might like something like that.. He said no. He doesnt want a watch, he doesnt wear jewlwery of any kind. Was thinking about getting nice cuff links as he doesnt own any, but apparently they are gay, ( Again WTF?) Hes not into music, i refuse to buy dvds as he has thousands already. IM not buying pc equiptment either. Why is it so hard.... or is he just ungrateful.

OP posts:
Original poster
shoptilidrop · 31/07/2008 12:07

thats stuff... not studd... although at this momment in time, i think thats what i might prefere!

OP posts:
stealthsquiggle · 31/07/2008 12:17

Men. You can't win[tsk].

Actually I take that back. DH has grown out of sulking about birthdays. I asked him if he wanted a cake for his 40th as I 'do' cakes but he doesn't actually like cake much and I thought it would fall into the I-put-loads-of-effort-into-something-which-he-doesn't-want-and-then-get-upset-because-he-doesn't-app reciate-it category (in which there have been plenty of contenders in the past) and he actually said yes

So I made him one (I think it's on my profile) and he loved it - mostly because it was not an 'out of a book' design, but tailored to be special for him

Unexpected, but really nice.

OP give your DH 10 years and he may grow up too

differentID · 31/07/2008 12:27

Sounds like he's realised he's approaching the age where he perceives he has to "grow up" and he doesn't want to. The men he works with are mainly younger than him?

Nassau · 31/07/2008 12:50

YANBU. Ungrateful goit. My DH would love something like that and then my MIL would nick it and pour over all the photos again and again and again....

Get your own back - run him a nice hot bath and add a few drops of cinnimon oil into it [evil] hee hee hee hee

bigpolarbear · 31/07/2008 13:13

YABU. You think it's a great present, he's not interested, what's the big deal??

honeybehappy · 31/07/2008 13:21

YANBU

my dp would love something like that, i just wish i could be arsed to do it.lol

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