Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to expect more than £3.60 per hour as an aupair plus?

59 replies

navyeyelasH · 24/07/2008 20:28

Hey everyone, just wanted to get a second opinion. I work as a nanny and have a load of childcare experience. The family I nanny for have decided (a bit short notice) that they are going away for 2 weeks as of Saturday 25th July (I get still get paid).

I normally arrange to work while they are away as I would die of boredom otherwise but as they only decided last minute I have been struggling to find some work. So I decided to look on an au-pair site - I registered my details and pretty instantly got a load of interest.

There was one woman I liked the sound of and I emailed her explaining I am not an au-pair and available for 2 weeks (she is from Italy holidaying in St Agnes for 2 weeks). By the sound of it she wants me to do the sort of work I do as a nanny and for 25-35 hours per week.

I will be staying with the family in their holiday home and I will be eating with them (I'll eat what I'm given not fussy). The little boy is three and she wants me to teach him a bit of English, do his laundry and ironing, keep him entertained, cook meals for the little one and evening meals for all of us. Which is fine by me but for £90 a week, is that right ?

I wasn't expecting a normal nanny wage obviously as she was looking for an aupair initially. But £90 seems like a joke?!

OP posts:
Sidge · 24/07/2008 22:30

If you're still getting paid why don't you take the 2 weeks off yourself? Lie in the garden getting a tan and eating chocolate

AbbeyA · 24/07/2008 22:39

I would have 2 weeks holiday. She is wanting a lot of work for peanuts. If you were just enjoying yourself on the beach amusing the DC it would be a good way to have a holiday. Cooking the meal for everyone every night is hard work, you would probably find that you were the one shopping for it and washing up!

expatinscotland · 24/07/2008 22:45

She wants a temporary slave so she can enjoy a holiday pretty much doing what she wants.

Fair enough. Then she can pay for it.

navyeyelasH · 24/07/2008 23:11

I just get bored at home - normally when I know I'm going to have 2 weeks off I sort stuff out with friends but they are all working. Think I might follow Sidge's suggestion, anyone know the forecase for next 2 weeks

*expatinscotland8 thank you for your very honest and to the point advice - my sort of person! What things do you reckon I should do? I did wonder about volunteer work but thought it might be too short notice?

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 24/07/2008 23:15

why not just clear your head, navy.

plan some special things for you and your partner to do.

browse some museums or shops you have always wanted but never had time to do.

do some DIY.

have a clear out and make some extra money on Ebay or Gumtree or at a boot sale.

work on a tan whilst summer is here.

etc.

1dilemma · 24/07/2008 23:23

I'm wiht expat re the temporary slave.
I did say on the other thread about the people on gumtree essentially wanting a nanny for au-pair wages didn't I.
I thought 20/25hrs work a week helping dc get up/dressed and playing a bit in the morning, then a bit of light cleaning hoover, dishes, kitchen counters tidying up after supper +- bath dcs would be about right. Or less in morning but pick up from school homework/play tea

ThingOne · 24/07/2008 23:33

Navyeye lash

I'm in Bath and need help with childcare as ill.

Atm I'm stuffed on Tuesday 8am until 3.30pm with two DS (2 and 4).

I pay more than £3.90 an hour.

Interested? I'm off to set up a hotmail addy so you can contact me if you are!

ThingOne · 24/07/2008 23:49

Bloody hell - that takes a lot longer than it used to!

without gaps

thing one and a bit @ live.com

navyeyelasH · 25/07/2008 08:44

Hey ThingOne I am about to email you but can't get my stupid email to load. If you happen to be online you can have a look at my website www.hayleyevans.co.uk as I would certainly be interested in helping you out.

Thanks everyone for your very good advice, expatinscotland your ideas sound lovely and I am going to do just that! With a little bit of working too. Going to go camping for a few days

OP posts:
jimjamshaslefttheyurt · 25/07/2008 08:50

If you're ever in Plymouth (no accommodation though) I'd always have ad hoc work for you.

pointydog · 25/07/2008 08:58

Most au pairs get a really raw deal. I agree with you, navy, it's pretty rubbish

Beetroot · 25/07/2008 09:00

normal au pair wages - they are for unqualified girls coming over and learning the language.

bed and board is worth alot.

pointydog · 25/07/2008 09:05

By describing them as unqualified and getting bed and board, it's almost as if any employer were doing them a huge favour.

justaboutagrownup · 25/07/2008 09:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

blueshoes · 25/07/2008 10:14

pointy, I do understand what you mean. But market forces are such that for the standard terms I offer, I get swamped with hundreds of applications within days simply because I live in London and my hours are quite short.

And board in London is a very significant perk.

Think of it as an exchange programme with economics thrown in on both sides. My aupair enjoyed herself immensely, made tons of friends and had a ball of a time. I think the money to her was incidental.

blueshoes · 25/07/2008 10:18

Agree with justabout that it is not a normal working relationship.

As a family, we also get a lot out of the experience. My aupair has opened my dd's eyes to Germany in a real life way. I learnt about the German culture and compared their ways of doing things. Heck, my aupair taught me a thing or two about cleaning. It also primes me for living with a teenager and for when my dcs are that age, lol.

I am hoping my next aupair, who is Swedish, will be an equal success.

AbbeyA · 25/07/2008 10:18

I think that your parents are doing it the way that it is supposed to work, justaboutagrownup.I thought that they were a student learning the language and were part of the family and they did light work in return.I have been appalled at the way they have been treated on TV programmes where the employer wants cheap labour and long hours. If a family wants a cook, nanny and cleaner on holiday they should employ them at the going rate. An au pair should pitch in like family, amuse the DC,babysit and help with chores.

Beetroot · 25/07/2008 14:56

It is a mutual thing

I have had a few au pairs

they worked 25 hours a week for me
I paid them £60 - this was 6 years ago
I offered oto pay £100 to my au pair if she came back to the country for 3 months and helped me out. Sge was stopped at customs and not aloud in as they said if I was paying her this amount then she was obviously a nanny and could not work in the uk as a nanny as she would be taking others jobs.

au psiring is something that helps both parties when done well.

the au pair is part of the family and learns english (if in england) but also helps out.

SqueakyPop · 25/07/2008 15:04

supply and demand

pointydog · 25/07/2008 16:26

You are all very reasonable and you don't sound exploitative at all .

When I was an au pair it was not fun but then I ended up with La Famille Bizarre - story de ma vie.

justaboutagrownup · 25/07/2008 16:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Beetroot · 25/07/2008 17:13

lol at my spelling too

allowed!!!

sunnytimes · 25/07/2008 23:24

Message withdrawn

pointydog · 25/07/2008 23:32

not allowed to have sole care of children under 2? How thing's have changed

nappyaddict · 26/07/2008 00:40

i would call a 3 year old a toddler but i thought au pairs just weren't allowed sole charge of babies (under 2.5ish?)