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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To regard MN as a lifesaver - when I'm at WORK

16 replies

Gateau · 22/07/2008 11:12

Since I've gone part-time at work, I've become a nodody. The rest of my team are full-time and I really feel as if I'm "on the fringes". I feel as they've nothing in common with me and I feel as if I've nothing in common with them. My baby is my life now - and they're not one bit interested. So I have what would normally be my chatty breaks in work on here - because there's nobody to chat to in reality. Is that sad?

OP posts:

frumpygrumpyhasPMT · 22/07/2008 11:14

Nope. Its probably what 90% of MNers are like Stuck with a team we have nothing in common with (children!) and seeking support from others.

Totally normal!!!!

ExterminAitch · 22/07/2008 11:15

nope, i work from home a lot of the time, this is my 'coffee break'. but it does mean that if you get into a discussion with someone you get a lot of sanctimony about how you should be out in the park.

what i'd be doing at the park by myself while dd is in nursery is never made clear...

frumpygrumpyhasPMT · 22/07/2008 11:15

And you are not a nobody. You might feel it next to them but your are not a nobody.

Your life is different from theirs now. Its ok.

Original poster

Gateau · 22/07/2008 11:21

Thanks frumpy (I'm sure you're not, but that's your name on here!)I appreciate you saying that. I do feel like a nodody though - not woirth bothering with. I feel that my personality has evaporated.
You know last week my colleagues really upset me. My little DS (15 m) had a temp and the nursery rang me at work three times. At least three coleeagues knew the nursery had rung (they took the calls) but not ONE person asked what was up. Strange thing was, one of those is a mother who I get on with quite well! It ended up that my DH had to go pick DS up - and still nobody asked how he was. Robotic zombies.

OP posts:

more · 22/07/2008 11:23

Show an interest in their lives, and it might change. If you want it to change then you need to change it.

I divide my break times between being on here and joining my work mates in the kitchen for their tea/coffee (does not help that I don't drink tea or coffee).

Original poster

Gateau · 22/07/2008 11:26

More,that's easier said than done.
I DO shown an interest, although I've nothing in common with them. But I try. But I get nothing back in most cases.

OP posts:

ExterminAitch · 22/07/2008 11:27

what do you do?

ExterminAitch · 22/07/2008 11:27

for a living, i mean.

Oblomov · 22/07/2008 11:32

I think that is a real shame.
God the best bit about working, is chatting with colleagues. God, I loved it. And I miss it. Been signed of 'sick', although I am not sick at all, for 3 weeks now. Miss it terribly.
Shame. Time for a job change?

Original poster

Gateau · 22/07/2008 11:37

Maybe, Oblomov. But the money's good and the hours suit me.

OP posts:

cornsilk · 22/07/2008 11:39

I know what you mean about it being harder when you're p/t but you must have something in common with them apart from chn. Can you invite them round to your house for drinks or something?

Original poster

Gateau · 22/07/2008 11:47

Thanks but no thanks I don't want to get THAT close to them. I'm just talking about a bit of inane chatter. But there is very little. There again, there is very little banter among the others as well. There's the odd outburst - and then all's quiet again. It's a very strange compnay. EG people pass you in the office and put their head down instead of saying good morning.
Maybe it's more because there isn't a woman on the team of about my age at a similiar stage in her life. It's not all about children, of course not. But my life is pretty much at that stage, ie I'm not doing a lot more than that. But I can engage in most conversations!

OP posts:

GirlWithTheMouseyHair · 22/07/2008 11:51

i'm with you - have a very boring temp job just seeing me through til birth of dc1 in october - absolutely nowt in common with civil servants and nowt to do during my 8 hour day...why I'm a member of so many flipping pregnancy forums!

kslatts · 22/07/2008 12:02

I sometimes feel I don't have anything in common with the people I work with, especially now that I've changed my hours.

Oblomov · 22/07/2008 12:11

I totally understand. My 'old'job is the best I've ever had. The banter and wit is fab.
Never had it before. When training as accountant , I visited lots of companies. And I have worked for/temped in lots too.
Very few is there any banter.
When you find a nice one, you (I) so appreciate it.

frumpygrumpyhasPMT · 22/07/2008 14:40

You might eventually find someone at work with the same sense of humour as you and then it won't matter what age/life stage you are each at. I have worked in places with people like me, with whom I have nothing in common and places with people totally different from me with whom I have had a great laugh with.

Keep plodding. Any chance of an internal move?

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