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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To get a bit annoyed at 'blonde' jokes in the office?

22 replies

May2December · 16/07/2008 22:31

I am blonde, consider myself to be as intelligent as any brunette, redhead, pinkhaired etc. female in my office, however I am finding myself getting pissed off at jokes implying that blondes are thick. Nine times out of ten, they will look at me (just before punchline) and say 'no offence'). Does that make it ok? It is not men telling these jokes btw but other women. Would they tell a racist joke in front of someone from another race preceded by 'no offence' or a homophobic joke etc.

I have not had a sense of humour bypass and can laugh at myself like the best of 'em but I am now finding this stereotyping is seriously pissing me off. Also, what should I do about it?

OP posts:
TurkeyLurkey · 16/07/2008 22:34

You could say "Well I can always dye my hair but you're stuck with that face"

Does that help?

TequilaMockinBird · 16/07/2008 22:37

You could raise a discrimination or harrassment grievance.

I too am blonde and work with mainly men. I get the blonde jokes aswell but tbh I wouldn't take it any further. I know that they are well aware I'm far more intelligent than them anyway and it's merely jealousy causing them to do it

PeaMcLean · 16/07/2008 22:37

at turkey.

Would piss me off too. Get a new job. You're working with thick people.

LongLiveGreenElizabeth · 16/07/2008 22:41

ARe you hand on heart a natural blonde? If so, then apologies.

Tbh, i never make any assumptions about natural blondes. (not looking for a pat on the back for that!)

But I'm afraid I used to be slightly confused when the died blondes in my office were huffy and offended by blonde jokes. I used to suspect them of loving it. I think that fake blondes deserve the ribbing, not natural blondes. Deserve is too strong a word there though.

Dolly Parton used to say "I know I'm not blonde and I know I'm not dumb".

I have red hair so obviously I have a ferocious temper and go round picking fights with everybody.

May2December · 16/07/2008 22:48

I do not dye my hair Longlivegreenelizabeth so I suppose I am a 'natural' blonde. However, I do not see what that has to do with it and just because someone choses to dye their hair blonde does not mean they have had a labotomy! (Hope I spelt that right - don't really want to be accused of being thick!!)

OP posts:
TurkeyLurkey · 16/07/2008 22:50

Have you told them their jokes are beginning to piss you off? They might be upset at the thought it was bothering you.

theexmrsfederer · 16/07/2008 22:52

The more you show it bothers you, the more they will do it.

Rise above it.

LongLiveGreenElizabeth · 16/07/2008 22:54

I agree, nobody deserves to be belittled in the workplace, it's not professional. I think people think it's ok, and maybe the way to deal with it is to reply, "thought about a nose job Malcolm?". "I can still see your shiny bald spot Derek.."

I suppose blondes come in for the ribbing because it's a little like advertising your vanity. We're all a little vain! And we should be. It's just being well groomed .

It's those yuckky acrylic fake nails that really make me think hmm

I'll be in trouble for saying that I know. Form a queue to tell me how mean I am.

PeaMcLean · 16/07/2008 22:56

Elizabeth, you just need to stop making blonde jokes. You're heading for pissing someone off there, dyed or otherwise.

stretchmarkqueen · 17/07/2008 00:22

Try having red hair...

theressomethingaboutmarie · 17/07/2008 13:36

damn right stretchmarkqueen - it's far harder let me tell you! I almost felt sad for my DD when it became obvious that she was going to have red hair. It really is beautiful but she will get nothing but hassle for it.

There was a thread on parenting last week about someone saying they fancied Chris Evans. Someone else exclaimed that they couldn't believe that they fancied the ginger Chris Evans (it was actually another Chris Evans so the villagers with pitchforks were called off).

Nagapie · 17/07/2008 13:42

Apologies - but All jokes have some inherent prejudice in them ...

Blueeyedgal · 17/07/2008 13:45

I'm a brunette with blue eyes and I get sick of people asking me if I dye my hair. Surely it is not that unusual to have dark hair and blue eyes is it. Ireland is full of them. My family are all dark haired and blue eyed.

stretchmarkqueen · 17/07/2008 15:12

All of my kids have red hair. 2 dd's (6 & 3)and 1 ds (9 weeks old). Ime, it is more than jokes, it's nasty and some people have a real dislike, or even phobia, about "gingers" Am dreading ds going to school. Boys seem to get it worse

SummatAnNowt · 17/07/2008 16:15

YABU, it's all lazy and perpetuates negative stereotypes.

My best friend of many many years is small, naturally blonde (though currently brunette), has big blue eyes and big boobs and it has always sickened me the number of people who've assumed she's a "dumb bimbo" over the years.

SummatAnNowt · 17/07/2008 16:19

I mean't YANBU!!!!!!!!!!

LongLiveGreenElizabeth · 17/07/2008 17:43

PeaMcClean I did not make one Blonde joke.

MrsTiddles · 17/07/2008 17:56

Are the jokes actually directed at you, do you feel?

If not then just ignore them,if they are then find a clever way to tell them to fuck off, like Turkey suggested

PeaMcLean · 17/07/2008 18:06

Sorry Elizabeth, i misread. I do get very stroppy about blonde jokes.

luckylady74 · 17/07/2008 18:12

YANBU women belittling other women's intelligence is wrong on so many levels and I find it tragic rather than funny when a blonde describes themself as having a 'blonde moment' - it makes my skin crawl that they think demeaning women is funny.
I have got a sense of humour, but gender equality isn't a done deal and women need to help themselves not set things back.

May2December · 17/07/2008 18:20

Mrs Tiddles - no I don't think the jokes are directed at me at all but they still annoy me. On one occasion a colleague realised what she was saying in my presence and was obviously embarrassed. But should I just ignore or say something - don't want to appear petty.

OP posts:
MrsTiddles · 17/07/2008 19:02

I think it must be clear that you don't like the jokes, if she was embarrassed. But I don't think taking a stand would stop them to be honest. Rise above it, smile, move on.

They clearly don't have enough to do with their days.

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