To be considering meeting this man

[Maybeiwill]

Long story short, DP and I have been together for 10 years...for the last few years neither of us have been that happy.

I went out last night with my friends and bumped into a guy in a club who I went to school with. We had a great night having a laugh, dancing, flirting etc. Well, I'm not proud of this, but I ended up having sex with him in the club toilets

He gave me his number and wants us to meet up. Would it be crazy to meet him again? I'm not sure I want to risk my marriage by getting into something like this, but on the other hand, this guy makes me feel so alive.

Advice please!

and would your parents want you to be so unhappy???

Don't you think they would be more cross if you split up because you were shagging another bloke and you split up that way?
Surley then they would feel like they paid out for a wedding that you wasn't bothered about

Aww, look, I'm not going to be harsh, maybe, because I don't know the full reality of your situation.

But when you say you can't stop thinking about him - well, yeah. It's quite recent. Today, this week, maybe this month, you won't be able to stop thinking about him.

But you will. And stopping thinking about him because his importance has faded is better than not wanting to think about him because he has (a) backed off because he doesn't want anything serious (b) become stalker-type hassling you and your husband (c) disappointed you in one of the many, many ways lovers do.

If you're unhappy with your dh, sort that out first. If it can be sorted. If not, then maybe think about moving on.

When you are in an unhappy relationship you are vulnerable. You need to either make what you've got happy, or leave - before anyone is hurt.

I do wish you luck in working through what is going wrong for you .

I agree mmj

Youre all right. I should just not see him again.

Themildmaneredjanitor I am on the puill.

give it time - you will come to regret it whether you stay with your H or not.

Thankyou wessexgirl

How old are you about 12? because surely any adult should know that on the pill you can still get STI's?

You would risk your marriage for soemone who has so little espect for women will sleep with them in the toilets of a dingy nightclub.

you would be insane to meet up again.

Maybeiwill - when I was with my ex I ended up in bed with a man on three separate occassions (the same man) - we didn't have sex but it was still a betrayal. I knew deep down that I would never have sex with him because he was just a younger pretty boy, childish, exciting, good looking. Still - it was the wake-up call I needed and I left that relationship eventually (for a different man!). I never really regretted it, I was just scared in the immediate aftermath of all three times that I would be found out and it would force the issue.

You obviously know things are not good with your husband, now you just need to decide if this is your wake-up call or if you want to work on your relationship.

themildmanneredjanitor - it might not be a wind-up. these things do happen.

He has been texting me today, says I am great looking and lots of fun

Shall i just ignore it? or shall i ask him not to text again.

Ah, there it is, y'see - 'great looking and lots of fun' - what a teen/single bloke wants from a woman.

Not what you really want from a man though, surely?

Is it in text speak?
If so, the relationship is doomed, clearly he is a dunderhead.

Im going to tell him it was a mistake, then im going to go cuddle up to DP.

Thanks everyone.

mistake? how can sex in a loo be a mistake?

It was sex kiddo, not love. Maybe I'm wrong but in a loo?

Don't tell him anytihng. Just don't reply to his texts.

nd as others have said, get yourself checked out at a gum clinic asap.

The private schools have broken up.

Bree and MMJ - I don't understand.