My OH needs to get a solicitor but is too laid back and I'm getting fed up of it all now. He's been separated for over 5 years - she has a "new" man, they have a child older than Tink with him and another on the way - but has refused to sign any papers he sends her way. He pays over the odds for the children and did before we had Tink (which isn't being taken into consideration for what he pays her) as well as having to go to London once a fortnight (which, according to the CSA website should be taken into consideration too) to see them and we're not allowed them here unless she brings them and they stay in a hotel with her. Before the new man it was worse because he would get a coach/train to London on the Friday night, drive the three of them in her car to his sisters house and do the reverse the next day. He wouldn't even be allowed to spend much time with them because it was the cousins time!
Tink and her youngest brothers birthday are quite close (Tink is next week and her brother is in August) so we've held off doing anything for her birthday because they normally come to Birmingham for a weekend in the summer so we do something joint for them a couple of weeks after Tink's birthday.
TBD asked last weekend if the boys were coming in the holidays and she's said no she's booked them in with summer activities everyday except the two weeks they're taking them on holiday. But the weekend we suggested they (the mother and her new man) are going out so they need TBD to babysit and he's doing it. The weekend we actually have plans.
He has told me that she won't allow the children to come to Birmingham this year because she's pregnant, but he wants me to go to London next weekend for Tink's birthday and I'm a high risk pregnancy!
When Tink was born (9 weeks early) she said she'd bring the boys when her baby was old enough (it was Christmas before he was) but I had to take a 6 week (37 CGA, IE still preterm) old Tink to London for the weekend for her brothers birthday party.
I'm fed up of the double standards of it all, the way we're (me and Tink) expected to go out of our way to do things when there is no two way on it. I know he is as much to blame for not sorting out a solicitor (especially now he's passed 5 years when he can do a separation without consent divorce) and I'm probably more angry with him because she will use him while he's willing to be used.
I've said I don't want to go next weekend and he is saying he'll take Tink on his own, which I don't want him to do.