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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

Original poster

To have thought that someone would have made a bit of a fuss of my dd when she left her school yesterday ?

23 replies

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 14:01

So - she's been there 4 years - and is leaving to go to a different school for her junior years - her best friend is going with her - and there was nothing said ! Her class did all sign the back of a class photo for her - but that was obviously a last minute thing !

Four kids leaving this year - my dd has been there the longest (4 y) her friend 2.5 yrs , a boy 2 years and another boy is returning abroad after 2 yrs. There was a class party held to say goodbye to the bot going back abroad - which dd went to - but again nothing was said !

It's not like we expected a fuss - but AIBU to expect someone to have at least said Goodbye and Good luck to her ?

OP posts:

FabioTheWhisperingCat · 05/07/2008 14:07

er, she's not the only one leaving, the children all signed a photo for her, there was a party and that wasn't enough of a fuss?

Original poster

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 14:08

Excuse me - BUT There wasn't a party for her !

There was a party for the foreign boy which the whole class was invited to and she went to - it was NOT her party and her leaving was not mentioned !

OP posts:

Original poster

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 14:11

I just think the party should have been for all four of them leaving - not just for the boy going back abroad ?

Surely not unreasonable ?

Also - there was a prize giving assembly on Friday - big fuss made of the Y6 leavers - no mention made of 3 of the 4 Y2 leavers - just the foreign boy ! How can that be fair ?

DD asked me this morning when I thought her surprise party might be !

Well I don't think IABU !!

OP posts:

FabioTheWhisperingCat · 05/07/2008 14:14

Sorry misread about the boy going abroad.

Why didn't you throw a goodbye party for her?

I don't think it's normal for anything more than a card or something when a child leaves a school. I dont' think your dd sounds hard done by.

FluffyMummy123 · 05/07/2008 14:16

Message withdrawn

Original poster

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 14:16

I am throwing a goodbye party for her actually - my question refers to it being unreasonable that the SCHOOL and the other parents did nothing !

The PTA organised the foreign boys party and funded it - cannot see why they couldn't have made it for all four of them.

OP posts:

Love2bake · 05/07/2008 14:16

I think your being a bit over the top TBH.

misdee · 05/07/2008 14:16

when dd1 left her old school she got a card from her classmates and teachers. no party.

was the boy from abroad there as a foreign exchange type programme?

Original poster

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 14:18

Misdee - no his dad was posted over here for 2 yrs and he came too. He was a bit of a novelty tbh - spoke no english etc - so I know why they made a fuss of him - but to a 7 year old it does seem unfair !

OP posts:

Littlefish · 05/07/2008 14:18

Sorry, but I think you are being unreasonable. Your dd going to a new school is, quite rightly, very important for you and her. However, in the grand scheme of school life, with the Yr6s leaving, teachers writing reports, holding parents evenings, children meeting their new teachers etc. it's just not that big a deal to everyone else.

Also, maybe the teacher thinks that your dd, as she still lives in the area, will keep in contact with her classmates, whereas the boy leaving to go abroad obviously won't be.

Original poster

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 14:18

A party wouldn't have occurred to me if one hadn't been thrown for this boy and SO much fuss made !

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 05/07/2008 14:19

Um, clearly you did expect a fuss or you wouldn't be complaining. IME there is never much of a fuss about leaving (bar Y6) because it all gets a bit too much and over emotional. A signed photo is about the sum of it TBH. Not even that for a few of the children who've left DS2's class!

cornsilk · 05/07/2008 14:20

Why is she moving to a different school?

Original poster

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 14:20

Didn't expect a fuss at all - just thought they might have said goodbye - is that really too much to ask after 4 years at a school ?

OP posts:

FabioTheWhisperingCat · 05/07/2008 14:23

FluffyMummy123 · 05/07/2008 14:28

Message withdrawn

LynetteScavo · 05/07/2008 14:36

Is this a private school?

(I'm guessing nice big financial gift to school from foreign boys parents)

octavia · 05/07/2008 14:47

I was thinking that lynette, its amazing how many of the v.wealthy/celeb kids are so amazingly brilliant and win cups for everything at my sons school.Its not sour grapes on my part either, my kid is brilliant anyway

Charmander · 05/07/2008 15:04

Why is your child leaving a school that goes up to Y6? The boy is obviously going because he is leaving the country.
Is it possilbe there is a feeling at school that your child and her friend are leaving because the school is not good enough for them?

reethi96 · 05/07/2008 15:24

I agree with Charmander although the teachers should be grown up about and should still have said goodbye.

I don't understand why you would expect the parents to do anything though. I wouldn't. If one of ds's close friends was leaving I might suggest that he made them a card but that would be it.

cazzybabs · 05/07/2008 15:46

maybew they did say goodbye but just not when you were there?

LadyMuck · 05/07/2008 16:20

You're moving from one private school to another one. You're not moving house or area, so your dd will still see her friends. Are you seriously expecting the school to make a fuss of your dd when she is heading off to a competitor?

I think that it is very different if someone is leaving the country.

Original poster

scatterbrain · 05/07/2008 16:37

How do you know that LadyMuck ? You been stalking me ?

Anyway - fed up with saying that I didn't expect a fuss - just a goodbye and good luck - as it was they seemed to completely ignore the fact that these 3 kids were leaving ! Yet made a big fuss of the foreign boy.

No they're not miffed at the school - agreed that after the bullying dd has had this year and how miserable she has been- it might be better for her to have a fresh start !

But OK - I A B U apparently !

OP posts:

Flip