To feel ashamed and peed of with DH?

[nightall]

Am quite a senstive person and worry what other people think of me.

Normally DH goes for a few drinks on a friday night after work and comes home in a taxi.
Usually he is a bit loud and merry.

He cane home at 8pm

He usually comes straight in but toinight the neighbours were out in their garage and DH stood outside about 20 mins chatting to them.

When he came in his eyes were all funny and you could see he had been drinking.
I dread to think what he was saying as I know he comes out with stuff he woud'nt say when sober and will probably forget by tomorrow.

Then he goes out the back for a cigarette and starts talking loudly to the other neighbour over the fence ,a neighbour he hardly ever talks to.

Know you may be thinking so what I am over reacting,he was having a few drinks at the end of the week.

But one of my neighbours works at the school and the other has children in my childrens class.
So I just know feel really embarassed to face them and worry what they will think of me.

my goodness, they probably are just thinking he is merry and friendly,
surely he could have been a lot worse?

Depends a bit what he was saying, I suppose. If he was telling them that you like it up the bum or something then that would be very embarrassing, but if it was general drunken bollocks then they will not care or remember - they may even have had a drink or two themselves.

He sounds friendly and harmless. And really who cares what the neighbours think? He is your husband, he is not exactly indulging in deviant behaviour in the middle of the road.

At least he wasn't dressed like an elf and wearing shitty pants like in a recent thread.

It could be worse

I wouldn't worry about it, They probably just thought he was a silly sausage (can't believe I just used that sentence ) and think its nice to live next to happy people.

I know I would!!!!!!!!!!

My ex was an alcoholic and so his conversations over the garden fence were always hugely awful and embarassing.

From what you say though he's only a little merry and I am sure other people are not judging.

Ermm,maybe I am just being a tad over sensitive.

It's just normally he is quite a reserved person so this would seem so out of character.

The neighbours husbands don't drink that often and I just thought they may think it a bit irresonsible at that time of night when he has 2 children.

Dont worry nobody will think anything bad anobt you dh or you and the dc, they will just think he was pissed and happy.

madamez as usual has such calming and eloquent, and indeed prudent, advice on the subject i feel i need add no more.

honestly - how bad do you think he wqas? if you think he was talking about robbing and murdering or how much you like 3somes with hookers, id understand the embarrasment. otherwise, chill woman. you are coming across as v high maintenance.

Do you think he's irresponsible? I ow how hard it can be when you're the sort of persono who really cares what other people think, I'm the same, but they probably really aren't judging.

I can totally empathise with you over this because I am exactly the same, and get extremely concerned over what others like neighbours etc must think of me because of x,y or z that has occured (usually nothing that bad).

If it helps I can honestly say that reading your post from a rational objective, there is really no reason to for you to feel ashamed; but if you are like me, you can't help feeling that way. I am making a real effort to change my thought patterns about these sort of things e.g " What is the worst that can happen? They might think he was a bit odd, but even if they do - so what? They are only neighbours and as long as my loved ones think well of me then who cares..." That sort of thing.

Don't worry about it, just try to rationalise it in your head and it does help.