Are people not buying Xmas presents anymore or just my family

[nicjoo]

We have not bought Christmas presents for the family for 15 years or so. As no need to waste time, money and stress buying stuff people don’t need and then for them to put into a cupboard and forgotten about.

Buy some nice food n drinks with the money instead

We do buy for birthdays as more personal.

There’s talk about people spending less money on gifts. But I don’t think this is the case.

Shops are full of pointless gifts sets such as little pots of jam that don’t cover once slice of toast.

Last year, a former colleague asked me what to buy her sister’s fiancés gran. I said nothing as you aren’t related.

Friends and family who work in retail always get customers coming in asking could they get refunds, credit or exchange on gifts they received as don’t like, item is the wrong size etc. Many don’t have a receipt so unable to refund etc.

Think before you buy and think do you really need to buy presents for certain people

After clearing out my inlaws house a few years ago, and chucking out so many ancient gift sets of soaps, fancy biscuits and novelty mugs that had been stuck in a cupboard in the dining room after being opened on Christmas day, we decided to take a firm stance on gifts. All my children are adults and have their own income, DH and I are at the stage of having sufficient of everything. We take it in turns to treat the family to something (breakfast, day out at the racing etc) and enjoy each other's company.

The only exception is that my DD buys me a nice calendar for the kitchen as she has done since she was 10. I make stockings for the family visiting on Christmas day, but that's for useful things like handcream or socks. We don't have any under 18s to think about but once grandchildren start to appear we'll have a rethink.

@didntlikeanyofthesuggestions You stopped buying your kids xmas presents when one of them was 3 years old?

Depends on your definition of family......

My sisters and I don’t buy for each other at Christmas, but we still do birthdays. We buy for the kids and our parents.

DH and I give each other a token present to open, but we don’t do big things. On birthdays, we just have a day out somewhere.

As adults, we have got to a point where we don’t really need anything, or if we do, we will just buy it instead of waiting for a big day.

My brother's girlfriend's granny isn't related to me. Even if they married she wouldn't be related to me. I responded to that post as looks like she misunderstood and thought it was husband's granny

Shops are full of pointless gifts sets such as little pots of jam that don’t cover once slice of toast.

How do you know? Have you been shopping? How very consumerist of you.
The little pot of jam might just have been perfect for my budget when I was a girl and wanted to get an older relative something.

I don't buy for anyone. Stopped last year for friends and distant relatives. I don't really celebrate Christmas now in any way.

Technically you wouldn't be related but if you spend time together as an extended family unit then it's all family to me.

I would love to buy more gifts and for more relatives than I currently do but we just can’t afford it. It’s no bad thing though to skip all the gift giving as it’s often wasteful/not good for the environment

I don’t buy things outside immediate family (7 people) and my two best friends. And for my team who I manage at work, I pay for a bottle of wine for each of them (3 people).

There’s no joy in meaningless consumption so it tends to be a few bits to unwrap and then an experience for dd16; bil and sil get a spa voucher to their fave place; dh and pil get wine or theatre/sports events tickets . Only ds8 gets any significant gifts to unwrap and actually this year he wants a day out in London.

As for me? I want garden stuff, great books, a new yoga mat, practical slippers . No one in my family will buy me this and my friends tend to get things I like but don’t need (like healing crystals or earrings).

The little pots are a great way of trying out fancy flavours without committing to a big jar.

Secret Santa for adults in the family and gifts for the children works really well for us!

Even if people don’t want to buy for everyone , Christmas is a time for exchanging gifts ,so why not just do secret Santa, set a theme , or get charity shop presents. At least get into the spirit of the thing . Growing up in the fifties we didn’t get a huge stocking full of presents with a main present eg bike under the Christmas tree like children do now, , but how thrilled was I to see Mum’s shopping basket, which I took empty to bed on Christmas eve, full of interesting looking parcels in which were an annual, a toy such as a xylophone a book, chocolate and sweets, gloves, hat and a game.

Then surely the fiancé should buy for his own gran, why would his girlfriend's sister need to buy for her.

The whole point about presents are that they aren't essentials, spread a bit of joy and excitement

I haven't done Christmas presents for many years and it's so wonderful to be free of that stress. I'm not into shopping at all and I try to limit how much "stuff" I own, so I have no interest in receiving things myself and in fact I absolutely dread getting gifts. It gives me great anxiety trying choose things for others as I invariably get it wrong. I resent the waste of my time as much the money. I really appreciate Martin Lewis's campaigning on this because it's helping to normalise the choice to let go of pointless tit for tat giving.

When your youngest child was 3 you stopped buying any presents even from Santa? 😳

We still buy for each other. We're only a small family so it's fine. I enjoy buying things for people though.

I’ve never met my sister’s fiancé’s gran. I suppose I might see her at the wedding, but I actually don’t even know if they’re alive. My sister didn’t ever meet my husbands grandparents either (we eloped) and we were together 15 years before they died.

Its not a “relative” that most people would see even at an extended family gathering

Thirty years ago I decided to only buy for DC and parents.

I buy for my mother, husband and two friends , and husband and I buy for our daughter. Husband buys for me and his dad.

I get presents from father in law husband and child and the two friends and some money from my mum.

I do know what you mean op albeit you do sound a bit preachy. Some people get into a huge present buoying scenario where they buy for people they are very tenuously linked to. I’m not sure your post will stop them!