DH closed bedroom door conversations… aibu to feel like he’s being rude?

[Pickupalilo]

DBIL lives with my DHs mum. Hes in his 30s. My DH had to drop off a prescription for his mum today, but she was out. DBILs bedroom is on the ground floor by the living room. Me and DH got there and DH knocked on his door, was talking in his room, and then went in and closed the bedroom door for around 10 minutes. I was standing awkwardly in the living room and just sat down waiting for DH. When DH came out he told me to come outside with them and have a drink (me and DH don’t drink so unsure why I would!).

DBIL didn’t say one word to me. I felt like I’d be waiting around and didn’t actually want to sit with them, so I asked for the car keys and said I’ll wait in the car (we had said we were popping in). DH got irate and said he wouldn’t bother so he got in the car too.

Aibu to think that this is really rude behaviour from two grown men? Surely you acknowledge your wife is just sitting around waiting for you?

Could be that he spent ten minutes persuading his brother that he could come out, you'd all sit and have a drink and it wouldn't be so bad despite how much he thinks you hate him - and then you kicked off.

Why do you have to be included in everything?

When you all went out back for that drink, did you address DBIL in a friendly manner yourself? Or was his not immediately greeting you enough to infuriate you further?
Maybe he and your DH had been talking about something which was distressing him healthwise (certainly something was of concern), so DH was perhaps attempting to give him a moment’s convivial company, but you immediately froze up and flounced off! No wonder DH was unimpressed.
(What do you mean about ‘this’ being a recurring theme there? Your not receiving sufficient fuss and deference, or what?)

Think you’re getting an overly hard time on here OP. If BIL wants to sulk in his room and not even say hello, why would you want to sit down and have a drink with him? Fair enough if it’s a one-off I’d probably be curious and want to have the drink to find out what was going on, but if this is the dynamic every time, no I wouldn’t be comfortable around a man who blatantly didn’t want me there! I’d stop going if I was you.

@Pickupalilo your reaction was odd. Maybe DBIL needed to say something in private to your DH. Or maybe he needed the door closed to get up and dressed.

Why do you need to be involved in everything and cause a situation if you’re not?

You should have sat and had a nice conversation with the two of them and not sulked off, embarrassing and angering your DH.

Surely, if @Pickupalilo is being asked to have a drink outside with the BIL, @RedSheep26, he is, by definition, not 'sulking in his room' - he is out of his room, attempting to socialise.

I really think there’s more to this than is being spoken about.
1.maybe your BIL has issues he wants to discuss on a personal level
2.maybe it wasn’t having a drink that was needed, maybe it was just a chance to talk to you about what’s really going on