To expect my elderly dad's surgery to offer non-digital options?

[CaringForMyElderlyDad]

I care for my 89-year old dad. Alongside many other responsibilities, I help him to manage his medication by putting his tablets into dosset boxes.

When he is running out of something, I ask him to call the surgery to request his repeat prescriptions. I write down what he needs and when he needs it by, along with the number for the surgery. Then I check that he has made the call.

I probably could order it from the surgery directly, but until now, it has been something that my dad has been able to do for himself. And as that list of things is gradually diminishing, I feel that it is important for him to be able to do it.

However, he rang today to request some tablets that were running out, and they instructed him that the only way he can now order a repeat prescription is online. Which of course he couldn't do, because he is 89 and struggling with the consequences of cognitive decline.

Obviously, I can do it for him so it isn't an issue, but what if I couldn't? Surely it isn't reasonable to expect all elderly people to be able to access digital options?

To be honest, I don't really understand why he needs to order the repeat prescriptions at all. The GP surgery knows what he takes and how often he takes it, and it should be easy enough to figure out when he will be needing another batch. But I accept that he does have to order it, and that's fair enough. I cannot accept, though, that he should have to navigate his way around an unfamiliar online system simply in order to get what he needs?

I am seeing the same with a family member whose working life was writing complex software and worked well past retirement age. Now in their 80s and they are starting to struggle with some of the things that a lot on this post are suggesting is easy. It may be easy for them, but not everyone is the same and it can get progressively harder with advancing age, even for those who were early adopters of technology and made their living in the industry.

My mum is the same age as you lot and can be self sufficient on her phone

When you go out of your front door do you fail to notice that people are different? Does your Mum have MS? Dementia? Arthritis?

Does he get anything like attendance allowance? If you weren’t there to do it, he could use that to pay. Thats what my grandad uses.

I'm 76 and manage things on line easily but I have to help husband (not good with smart phones etc). There won't be anyone to advocate for us if we live to be very old and that's what I dread.

Not at the moment but planning to apply for it... when I get round to it.

The NHS is becoming increasingly inaccessible.

They send my husband an email to inform him he’d tested positive for a disease. They’ve never done that before. He is unable to look at screens and his preferences are set as phone call. They also didn’t update the app which alerts him there’s a change so I can check for him.

22 days they left it with no response until on a call about something else they asked what he’d done about his X Disease! This is a man housebound through neurological symptoms that could be caused by X disease!

If you read my first post on this not the reply I specifically state that the UX and design of NHS services makes it difficult for elderly people and that this should be addressed. I state I have no sympathy for old people who refuse to engage with tech, but have every sympathy for those who struggle with the appallingly designed NHS interfaces.

I believe you can add someone else to your own NHS app. Perhaps that's the way.

The main use of the app is to do repeat prescriptions. It's excellent.

I was talking about being able to add a parent to your own NHS app, not about talking to the surgery. You can only add other people to your NHS app if youre at the same surgery. Which is ridiculous.

Some older people just don’t have the capacity to deal with any tech (not just NHS) even if they have previously used it.

Definitely worth trying to find time to apply as he can use that money to have someone help him with things like this if you can’t be around for any reason. My grandad uses it to pay for someone to do his washing, change his bed, do some cleaning and do any online stuff for him. She sorts out his prescriptions and appointments online.

Sorry I've not read the full thread but can you ask for a venalink for your Dad? The pharmacy sort all his pills for him into morning/lunch/teatime/evening and they'll deliver weekly/monthly. Maybe worth looking into?

Oh! Stop the presses! Hold the front line! @Shoobadadoo ’s mother can do it - and therefore everyone else should be able to! Clearly, a one-size-fits-all society is just what we need. No need to throw more money at the NHS or restructure it and, while we’re at it, those pesky reasonable adjustments employers and - oh, yes, service providers like the NHS - are legally required to implement for people with disabilities aren’t needed anymore. Everyone just has to try harder!

Am I pissed off by some of what I’m reading here? Yes, I am. Pissed off and thoroughly depressed. And with a view that’s currently coloured by 30 minutes on the phone with my elderly relative who was worried they’d ordered the wrong thing on Amazon and even more worried they’d inadvertently signed up (again) to bloody Prime. And this is a person who had a very responsible professional job until their mid-60s, who liked climbing mountains for fun, who taught themselves to use a computer back in the 80s….. and now the world is racing ahead too fast for them even to catch onto its coattails.

Here’s a thought: maybe some people who want to stay living independently (and good for them!) would find it easier to do so if life wasn’t so very difficult for them to navigate. If there were, y’know, easily accessible alternatives to ordering repeat prescriptions online.

Also - god help Shoobadoo’s mother if she ever does need help with tech. (Fingers crossed Shoobadoo is just a shit-stirrer.)

It’s simply unrealistic that we can have a world for everyone 0-62 (it seems) and the a digital free paper dependent world for old people. Like you get to 62 and it’s decided you’re old and senile and have to move to the basic version of everything because you can’t think straight or use your fingers any more

Are you quite young?

I suspect most of the posters on this board are 50s-60s and are supporting parents of the age 75-95+.

It is important that the world doesn't isolate the oldest generation by virtue of removing the most straight forward methods of contact.

Now it may be that tech moves on, so for example face recognition removes the need for some passwords, which is helpful. Alexa seems quite helpful, once you know how to drive her, but if your hearing isn't so good it can still be an issue.
However for example at the moment chatbots seem to be highly unhelpful things. As are banks which remove your local branch but then tell you to go to your branch to sort things out.

As people reach the elderly stage their brains get less flexible / able to learn and retain new things. Tech you know and love becomes slow and stops working. Then you get a new version, they have changed the layout and how to do things, and all of a sudden it is too hard to grasp.

My Dad uses his old screwfix catalogue, it is just there next to his armchair. Easier for him than having to remember how to turn the computer on, find the right icon, double click with arthritic fingers, finger peck type, not know the 'right' way to search etc.

Are you not reading any of the posts on this thread or do you have a problem with comprehension?

Plenty of people have pointed out that their relatives were once extremely capable but now have cognitive or physical problems.

I am currently on hold to my GP's surgery because, and not for the first time, a link they want me to follow just doesn't work.

I can't even reply to their message request because that doesn't work either.

...It is especially important that healthcare access remains accessible to older people. There must be a way the older or other more vulnerable people can access their GP and make appointments and requests without barriers.

I am 72 and can do on-line stuff but my surgery has my two regular medication on standing order with their pharmacy and I get a text once a month to say it's ready for collection.

I do admit that my post was a bit crass but I was not referring to people who have cognitive decline or other disabilities. For this I apologise sincerely.
Being able to go online is a really important skill and can be an absolute godsend for elderly people. People can order their food online or keep in touch with their friends. There are many people in our road in their 80s and 90s as they all moved into their houses at the same time 50 years ago when they were built and haven’t moved since. During the covid lockdown, like many other neighbourhoods, our street organised a WhatsApp support group. All these elderly people managed to use it. If they needed something they could post on this WhatsApp group and somebody would help them with it.
Most people are busy when they are younger, with work and young families but as these families grow older they have more time to learn new things and surely learning to go online should be important. Just as important as being able to read and write.
It is the same with everything when you get older. It is important to make an effort. The elderly parents board on this site has many posts from people who as well as working and looking after a family are expected by their elderly parents to run round after them, when their elderly parents are perfectly capable of doing these things themselves.
I used to do some things for a elderly aunt but on one occasion, I refused to book and take her to a new physiotherapist appointment because she had not even attempted to do the exercises she was given in the previous appointment!

The receptionist has to fill in the e-consult on their behalf if they're incapable. I hope they do this once it's explained he isn't able to.
They can't simply refuse to serve him.

A wonderfully patronising post by Abouttime

it's not that my dad can't go online, at all. It's more dealing with passwords and security that's the issue and can go pearshaped . Hence, he'd prefer to use the phone. Like a pps relative, he got into computers in the 80s.
He doesn't want me or anyone else to help - he wants to be independent.

Ive suggested WhatsApp, but its new to him and he doesn't trust it. So he sticks to texts and emails.

I was in a gp surgery and heard the receptionist telling someone to ask their grandson/granddaughter to help. Massive assumption there.

Also not only are banks closing, but so are post offices round my way.

It's eye opening to me how many people are unaware (and lucky them) of the realities of cognitive decline. My dad has parkinsons my mother dementia and two very independent minded clever adaptable and previously tech savvy people are thrown into a panic if they receive a message on their phone. Because they they can't then find the message again as they mix up text, WhatsApp and email and get completely lost on their phone. My mother said recently in bewilderment "what's whatsapp" .. this is the woman who set up our family WhatsApp 5 years ago. 50 % currently suffer cognitive decline by 85 so we will always have a generation locked out of tech as it currently stands. Maybe AI can be used to invent new user friendly systems

Fat lot of good it does telling people to use younger relatives when many people don't have any.

With the birth rate plummeting there are going to be a lot more childless people.

The thing is. Previous generations were baffled by phones and did everything by post. Then landlines were invented and people adapted. Then mobile phone invented etc. people have HAD to move with the times or we would still have old people using carrier pigeons or writing letters to their GP to request appointments but they’ve managed to learn to use telephones. People adapted. Human kind moved toward.

yes hopefully AI makes this smother for old people but the idea that they can do things without being online is unrealistic.