Holy Sh*t That Was Scary

[MakeThatMakeSense]

So, I was just driving home alone at ~00:15am

And I saw a guy in a black tracksuit, out in the rain, in a posh road amongst big gated houses. And it looked like he was trying to break into a parked car.

So I was just processing what I was seeing. So I slowed down as I drove past, and then came to a stop down the street (much further, but still in sight I suppose).

It's not a remote spot. And actually it's not a road that tends to have 0 passing traffic.

Anyway, I called the police and told them what I saw. They asked if he was still there. I looked in my mirrors, couldn't see him. Assumed he must have fled. And backed up, still with police on hands free. Said no, I can't see him anymore.

However, then I saw an eye looking at me through the gap between the gate and the wall of this big gated house.

I still had the police on the phone.

I wound my window down and said "can I help you?" And then he appeared over the fence, shouting abuse at me aggressively and proclaiming that that was his house.

I really felt like it was not his house.
But whatever, I drove off and was talking to the police giving a description of him.
But I see him running after me in the rearview mirror.

So I just continued to drive on at a steady pace. But he must have jumped in a car because next thing, I'm being chased / pulled up alongside by this lunatic scally shouting abuse at me through the window.

I didn't react and I didn't want to speed up so in the end he threw a glass bottle at my car and sped off like a mad man.

The whole time I was on the phone to police.

They're out looking for him now.

Was scared to go home for a while but I'm in now.

Just sat here thinking... Wow I was just wanting to get in bed and enjoy catching up on Traitors and somehow ended up in some sort of mad dramatic night.

Did I do the right thing?
Feel like j just got myself in dangers path?
Should I have just ignored what I saw?

It just depresses me to think I wouldn't look out for people in my local area. Hence j felt a duty to call police.

I don't know what scene I just stumbled on but there was definitely something 'off' about it.

YABU - you should have just ignored it and gone about your business

YANBU - you did the right thing calling the police

I havent read all the posts but it seems unlikely behaviour from a normal burglar who would want to flee in the night. Im wondering if its an ex partner or someone with a link to that particular house owner.

Rich folks who live in gated houses don’t have keys or need to start engines. Their cars just open and start automatically. I don’t know how she didn’t manage to just get away before him though!

I'm wondering whether it was a one-eyed burglar, like the giant in Odyssey?
This clue will surely narrow down the field suspects and help police track down the criminal before he can manifest in other gardens at dead of night!
A gripping Halloween dilemma!

Oh, egg of eggs on my face, I forgot that a fence one has demonstrably gone through in seconds offers complete safety. By all means lets open our windows to strange men then.

Really stupid comment.

Adrenaline causes people to react in different ways. The OP felt safe to try and help so they did what they felt comfortable with at the time. It's not being a vigilante. It's doing what you think is right.

Other people just completely turn a blind eye to crime. I would much rather have people like the OP out there trying to bring justice to this country.

Policewomen (and men) also need to be there for their families.

Huh? They applied for the job, I didn’t. Isn’t it part of their job spec to deal with car thefts?

Yes they applied just as the OP decided to get involved. Yet she's being criticised for her decision.

...and as I said they may have families just like you...

Adrenaline doesn’t make you forget principles of personal safety.

I’ve been in that position several times, adrenaline didn’t make me risk my own safety.

That’s an oversimplification of how the human brain responds to a threat.

Adrenaline doesn’t erase your knowledge of personal safety, but it can significantly impair your judgement, narrow your attention and trigger fight, flight or freeze responses.

Knowing what the safe thing to do is and being able to apply that knowledge under extreme stress are two very different things.

You cannot assume that someone will make perfectly rational decisions when they believe violence is imminent.

Lots of studies have shown this- here is just one: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/39070283/

You cannot assume an irrational decision is related to adrenaline. OP may just be naive and unstreetwise.

OP had no reason to believe violence was imminent when simply looking at a person from her car.

Well that's nice. But you're not everyone. No two people are the same.

Adrenaline works in different ways. Fight, flight or freeze. You're a flight person. Others are a fight person. Some freeze.

I broke up a fight between two Y11 boys, both well over 6ft tall and both much bulkier than me. Two male members of staff watched me.

Adrenaline told me that if someone didn't do something then one of them was going to get seriously hurt, so I stepped between them and managed to stop them.

That’s a completely different scenario, I’ve actually broken up a fight on a tube for similar reasons. In this case however, it was a property crime that needs no personal direct intervention.

Why not? If everyone intervened in crimes - even trivial crimes - there would be a lot less crime.

So property theft does need to people to intervene. It's just most of us aren't brave enough to.

How we convert our own inadequacies into criticism of others for their public spiritedness is beyond me.

Did you actually read my previous posts about my family member who was murdered when he tried to stop a car theft? With nobody being attacked? I specifically said that intervening to protect another person is different.

The partners of emergency responders have chosen to be with someone who takes such risks, and in any event they are very carefully trained and equipped to minimise risk. For example, my relative would not have died if he had been a police officer because he’d have been wearing a stab vest.

Seriously? Did you never do self defence at school?

It was drummed into us: if you are attacked for property or you see someone committing a property crime: let them have it, even if they are trying to steal a high value item from you or someone else - it’s not worth getting stabbed over.

If you see crime being committed call the police.

Exactly. I’m really sorry to hear it.

Er by calling the police which is exactly what she did. She backed up to get more info so maybe the police could get an arrest. Pp telling her to grow up is out of line.

So what?

Your relative did what they thought was right. Or they acted instinctively, who knows.

Either way they aren't an idiot, they aren't a bad person.

If you see a crime being committed do what you think is best. That could be nothing or it could be George Cross winning heroism. If other people want to criticise you later for your decision that says more about them than you.

Cars start without keys automatically 😮, I’m still in living in the 90s! And drive an old banger which needs a key

I think you are on to something with the Odyssey giant, but I’m thinking rather than cyclops it was a giant squid because they have a huge bioluminescent eye, clearly sucked up by a huge water spout 🌪️ due to the storm, and dumped in a swish area, desperate to get back to the sea, it tried to break into the car to make a hasty retreat, they are highly intelligent and realised it’s misdemeanours were clocked by the OP, so scarpered under the fence, since they can squidge themselves into the smallest of gaps, just as it popped it’s huge eye through the hole in the fence to see if the coast was clear, OP looked directly into its eyeball…